mystery1234 Posted September 18, 2013 Posted September 18, 2013 I am a straight female and recently, one of my best friends told me that she is gay and in love with me. Since the feelings aren't returned on my part, we had a really, really hard conversation about it when it first happened about a month ago. There were many tears on both sides because we didn't know what to do or how to move on from this. For the first week after that conversation, she seemed to be healing, and said that hearing me say out loud that I'm not attracted to girls was the catalyst for starting to feel better. Since then, there have been some ups and downs - some days it seems to slowly get better. Other days she gets very depressed about it and tells herself (and me) she doesn't think these feelings for me will ever go away. On these bad days, I get depressed too because I feel so terrible about the situation (even though we both recognize no one is truly to blame), and I get major anxiety at the thought of our friendship ending. It's to the point that even on the good days, I feel anxious that a bad one is coming up. I think one of the things that makes it hard is that since we are so close, we tend to tell each other when we're upset about this and it feels like it starts to spiral downward. We both really value this friendship and want to figure out where to go from here in order to keep it in tact. Is there a way to do this without cutting ties completely? Are there things I should/shouldn't do to help her cope? I think part of that will be getting my own anxiety in check.
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