Sadguy33 Posted September 18, 2013 Posted September 18, 2013 we dated 5 years,she cheated on me, was a bitch to me/abusive for a year at least, had no respect for me whatsoever at the end of the relationship. why do i still want her to be back with me? we arent and she has no interest, i hate her and know its so damaged things are ****ed. but why would a logical person (me) still be open to working things out? 1
Miss P Posted September 18, 2013 Posted September 18, 2013 I know just how you feel! I think it must be to do with rejection - I think it blows a whole in our self-esteem. Being dumped hurts like hell & if we had them back at least it would stop the horrid pain. We also invested a ton of time & effort in them. Honestly mate, you are better off without someone like that even though it hurts like hell now. I think once you heal & start feeling good again you're see what a negative part of your life she was.
Ireallydontknow Posted September 18, 2013 Posted September 18, 2013 Is that me writing this post? This sounds almost 100% identical to me. I think it's probably because we're just that great of a person. She did everything you listed, hell we even dated 5 years too! I do think it has to do with dulling the pain. I miss her, I miss her stupid face, I miss her stupid body, I miss her stupid voice, I miss her stupid conversations with me. Were just going through withdrawal it sucks, but it's part of the fact. I have nothing to say that will help, just keep on keeping on and don't hold on to hope. I lost mine a long time ago.
tart6245 Posted September 18, 2013 Posted September 18, 2013 It's familiarity. You miss the good times you had with that person and you wish you could go back and recapture them. Hell, I feel the same way. I miss my FWB, but she was sleeping around and was using me for what I could do for her in the process, so I had to stop that. It hurts like hell. I miss her, I miss doing stupid crap with her, I will spending time with her. But things will never be the same. You have to convince yourself of that. 1
ashleyn09 Posted September 18, 2013 Posted September 18, 2013 I was the same way. He was an emotional abuser and I had little self confidence after being with him but until last night I wanted to do everything to get him back. It's insane...it may have to do with rejection. I may also be because in my case as the victim I was so used to it and didn't know how to function without him. Even though he made me feel like crap, last night he did it again and I found out he was already living with another woman just a month after our breakup so he was cheating on me too. I'm sure he has told her lies about how horrible I am like he did me with his ex wife but whatever she will find out lol. I'm so happy I am free of him, I think that it was the straw that broke the camels back and enough was enough. Maybe you have to get to that point.
crazy1234 Posted September 18, 2013 Posted September 18, 2013 we dated 5 years,she cheated on me, was a bitch to me/abusive for a year at least, had no respect for me whatsoever at the end of the relationship. why do i still want her to be back with me? we arent and she has no interest, i hate her and know its so damaged things are ****ed. but why would a logical person (me) still be open to working things out? Ofcourse not..No one deserves such sick people in their life.Let that do whatever she wants to do in her life and you move on immediately.You cannot want a person so heartless,no one can.Its just the habit thats pulling you towards her.
Vinsanity1307 Posted September 19, 2013 Posted September 19, 2013 My relationship was 5 years as well. I am on day 56 of NC and day 67 since the break up and am still longing for her and those good memories. The first 2 years with me she was an awful person was doing everything to hurt me and we were engaged. Then I stopped being as nice and sensitive and had the confidence to walk away this turned her around completely and she would do everything and anythign for me the next few years... Mind you she had no job or was in between cars(not having one), and cell phones being shut off constantly..Then she got her life together recently and basically left with no warning out of the blue...Again two months and she is still all i think about...It sucks man i KNOW how you feel'
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