JessieJ08 Posted September 18, 2013 Posted September 18, 2013 So what would you think if a boyfriend/girlfriend gave you a password to an email but you knew they had another email they won't give you a password to? And if their reasoning was because it is linked to their FB would you think they were hiding something from you? This is what is going in with my friend the guy she has been with for years has always kept things secret, when they first started dating they would give each other passwords it was no big deal until she caught a woman hitting on him and she asked him about it he instantly changed all his passwords from that day on, He also has always kept a lock on his phone which when they started dating he never did, she did find out he was downloading apps like Hide a text and sms lock and she questioned him about he gave 3 excuses 1 he wanted to make sure she wasn't on them 2 he never used them 3 he doesn't remember why he downloaded them Well now my friend who use to never say anything to him really or freak out about it finally stands up for herself but she stills feel as tho he is hiding things between other women from her, She went on his FB and saw he had looked up an ex who deleted him years ago it wouldn't have been a big deal but this ex and him were suppose to be married so she thought that was strange asked about that He said he went to her profile 3 times because he was trying to block his ex because she wrote him but there were no messages from her in his inbox. Now that he has been called out for his trustworthiness he let her have his Gmail password but when it came to Yahoo he said no because that was hooked up to his Fb. My friend gets people need privacy she is a very respectful person of that but What are you to do when someone your in a relationship with seems to be this much about their privacy suddenly but are doing questionable things?
Philosoraptor Posted September 18, 2013 Posted September 18, 2013 Trust is trust. I don't need my fiancee's passwords to trust her. What he is doing shows signs of him being untrustworthy, and that's enough of a reason to leave. Actions will show you if someone is trustworthy. Even having a password, a good sneak could make sure to erase his trail or even make a separate facebook/email/whatever in order to make contact with others.
almond Posted September 18, 2013 Posted September 18, 2013 I believe in transparency in long term relationships, but I also believe in allowing each other space and respecting boundaries. His secrecy re: contact with other women does sound a bit dodgy, and it is concerning. I hate to jump on the paranoia bandwagon, but I'd be bailing from this relationship. It's not necessarily because I think he's cheating, but because of the trust issues. I don't think it's healthy to be with someone that you do not trust. And in this instance, there doesn't seem like there are any steps being made toward rebuilding it either...things aren't looking good for them IMO.
Babolat Posted September 18, 2013 Posted September 18, 2013 That's a lot of BS drama to have in a relationship. When the need for passwords and snooping crops up - IMO the relationship might as well be over. Agreed...I snooped on my last gf, felt like crap doing so, and it was a trigger to me that something was seriously wrong in the relationship.
Shepp Posted September 18, 2013 Posted September 18, 2013 I'd never want my gfs password to anything - she either wants to be with me or she doesn't, im not going to go reading her emails.....I cant even be bothered to read my own! Id be pretty insulted if she wanted my passwords - she should trust me! Saying that I tick remember me on everything and I never put a password on my phone or owt so she can read what she wants - ive got nothing to hide!!
FitChick Posted September 18, 2013 Posted September 18, 2013 I wouldn't give any man my password unless we were engaged to be married.
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