NGC1300 Posted September 17, 2013 Posted September 17, 2013 I don't think it is. No matter how serious the relationship seems, how can you know they won't eventually walk off or cheat on you? I've had it happen twice, and it's gotten to the point where I don't think I'll ever really feel connected with a woman again. This is because I'll have to keep alive the possibility of betrayal.
RiceaRoni Posted September 17, 2013 Posted September 17, 2013 I don't think it is. No matter how serious the relationship seems, how can you know they won't eventually walk off or cheat on you? I've had it happen twice, and it's gotten to the point where I don't think I'll ever really feel connected with a woman again. This is because I'll have to keep alive the possibility of betrayal. Yeah I agree with you on this one...Ive been left so many times to the point where I don't think there is a guy out there that WOULDN'T walk away. I guess it's part of the whole "letting go of the past thing" you have to let go of the past because not everyone is the same when it comes to relationships..not saying you need to trust someone right off the bat, I also think trust needs to be build over time. It takes time for trust to be built, and after a while you just learn to trust that person based on their actions towards you and how they treat you.
todreaminblue Posted September 17, 2013 Posted September 17, 2013 (edited) hey ngc, it is really hard to trust people, and to truly trust someone you have to let go of what others have done to you, if you think hey i am trustworthy i would never do that....you are not alone in the world there are many who believe in honesty and fidelity and how dont walk out at the first sign of trouble..... i think when you have been cheated on you learn the signs and you can determine when in a new relationship if the person will fold or try and work things out if they are committed........and you take that with you, so you can trust you wont be blind in trust but you can trust.The fact remains that if someone is going to cheat you might be the last to know but nearly all cheats get found out.all lies that are told need to be remembered the truth doesnt and thats how they slip up it becomes a lie to protect a lie and eventually it unravels.the truth is always constant.People who arent committed let you know pretty fast in a relationship so until it happens...you let it go and enjoy what you have ......which is not the same as what you had before with a person who let you down....its a new start with soemone who is just maybe exactly like you..trustworthy..good luck .....deb Edited September 17, 2013 by todreaminblue 1
RiceaRoni Posted September 17, 2013 Posted September 17, 2013 hey ngc, it is really hard to trust people, and to truly trust someone you have to let go of what others have done to you, if you think hey i am trustworthy i would never do that....you are not alone in the world there are many who believe in honesty and fidelity and how dont walk out at the first sign of trouble..... i think when you have been cheated on you learn the signs and you can determine when in a new relationship if the person will fold or try and work things out if they are committed........and you take that with you, so you can trust you wont be blind in trust but you can trust.The fact remains that if someone is going to cheat you might be the last to know but nearly all cheats get found out.all lies that are told need to be remembered the truth doesnt and thats how they slip up it becomes a lie to protect a lie and eventually it unravels.the truth is always constant.People who arent committed let you know pretty fast in a relationship so until it happens...you let it go and enjoy what you have ......which is not the same as what you had before with a person who let you down....its a new start with soemone who is just maybe exactly like you..trustworthy..good luck .....deb well said I agree.
Silly_Girl Posted September 18, 2013 Posted September 18, 2013 I trust my husband more than anyone in the world. But that's not 100%, because people can and do surprise. No one is infallible. And I've been hurt a lot. I could never say "I KNOW he would/wouldn't do XYZ". But I can be almost sure and that's as much as I can hope for. 1
SuperGeek Posted September 18, 2013 Posted September 18, 2013 I am struggling with this very issue myself. I've had a lot of rejections with dating over the last year and my last two major relationships ended with the woman walking out the door. I'm at the point now of just accepting women just won't stay around and that at some point they will trade me in for an upgrade. I guess this is okay I suppose, though I did hope I could score a life companion. Maybe life companions don't exist? The divorce rate certainly suggests this might be true. It's been three years since a divorce, still single and still struggling with not trusting. Three years of mostly rejection has really made it worse too.
Phoe Posted September 18, 2013 Posted September 18, 2013 I believe in trust. No one has yet earned mine, but i still believe in it. 1
gaius Posted September 18, 2013 Posted September 18, 2013 I don't think you can ever trust that someone will never depart from your life. But sometimes you can trust in what they tell you and not always end up disappointed. And that they'll be a decent human being about it if they do decide to depart. If women are frequently cheating on you then it's an issue you need to explore. As deb said, you can usually learn the warning signs after the first time. So what's going on? Why is it a repeating pattern? There are definitely loyal women still out there. 1
miss_jaclynrae Posted September 18, 2013 Posted September 18, 2013 I trust my husband more than anyone in the world. But that's not 100%, because people can and do surprise. No one is infallible. And I've been hurt a lot. I could never say "I KNOW he would/wouldn't do XYZ". But I can be almost sure and that's as much as I can hope for. This definitely.
emva07 Posted September 18, 2013 Posted September 18, 2013 I like to think the best in people, I am very trusting. But if they were to do something to hurt me I wouldn't be shocked, we are all human and you can't put anything past anyone. 2
thefooloftheyear Posted September 18, 2013 Posted September 18, 2013 100% trust is for family and usually like gendered VERY close friend(s). SO's are just random strangers that you meet in the street...Before you met them they were nobody to you..They dont share blood, DNA, anything. 50% of marriages end in divorce and of the other 50% at least 40 is on the fence or cant because of variouos reasons...Put trust in them? I know I can always trust my mother and my kid...Everyone else?, just depends on the day of the week.. TFY
almond Posted September 18, 2013 Posted September 18, 2013 I disagree. It's definitely possible, but it's (obviously) heavily dependent upon the people in the equation.
carhill Posted September 18, 2013 Posted September 18, 2013 Is it possible to have complete trust in someone?In a romantic relationship? Probably not, but I did for many years with multiple partners. Marriage taught some valuable lessons in that regard. I do trust my best friend completely. He's earned that trust, and I his, over decades. We're like brothers.
Philosoraptor Posted September 18, 2013 Posted September 18, 2013 What's there not to believe in? Trust and faith go hand in hand. Can you logically trust that anything is what it is? Can you 100% trust that your keyboard isn't going to suddenly melt right now? Sure, it's unlikely, but your stove could explode right now and make the room so hot the keyboard melts. Likely, no; possible, yes. Same goes for trust in people. We all know that people can be unpredictable and we're always learning new things about them. But if you have faith in someone enough to give over your heart fully, you need to have the trust in them that they are not going to break it. To me, this goes hand in hand. If you're saying you can't trust someone 100% it's your own way of saying you don't trust yourself enough to give yourself to someone 100%. Relationships fail, trust get broken... but a relationship is doomed from the start if you can't open up enough to give yourself totally to another. 1
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