I don't know whether this is a game or a competition.

[Rick1]

My ex-girlfriend of 2 years and I broke up at the end of June. (I'm 26, she is 21) A week after we broke up she immediately got involved with someone else (Who was actually one of my "friends") and they've been together ever since. From now til then, we've have periods of no contact.. but of course we've ran in to eachother a few times Downtown because we go to a lot of the same clubs and know the same people. 4 weeks ago we texted, she called me to come over and talk - and after hugging to say goodbye we wound up having sex(while she's still with this guy). I left feeling like an idiot but I didn't let it show. Instead I made it seem like it didn't effect me and left.

 

Anyway, after that I went right back to square one with myself and this breakup and from that point on I went completely NC. Well yesterday I found out that her and her boyfriend broke up. From what I've noticed she's had quite a few trust issues/fights with him, mainly because he doesn't trust her and she still has feelings for me but won't admit it. (She's admitted it to me in the past during the break up.) Last night I was in at a bar with some of my friends and sure enough, she showed up. She was staring at me the whole time. Trying to get my attention. I remained to myself and continued talking to my friends. Then she walked over and said hi to them - and of course then she said hi to me. I kept it cool and brief, gave her a hug and she walked off. We decided to leave and venture off elsewhere, and her and her friend started to follow us out. She tried to follow us but one of her friends stopped her. Later on in the night she texted me and said "hi". Then she texted me and said "doing?".. I didn't respond to either one. Then at 3 in the morning she texted "?".

 

This morning I wake up and she sent a text saying "Morning, good seeing you last night. Glad we can be civil have a good day."

 

I texted back and said "Same. You have a good day too."

 

She tried to start conversation by saying "Ugh I'm hungover at work!" I didn't reply. Then she texted me again and said "Question?" I texted back "What's up?" She asked me if I was "talking" to the bartender, cause we were flirting a little that night and I guess she saw it. I told her "No". Then she said to me "You're so short with me, you hate me that much?" And I said to her "I don't hate you." She txted back "Promise?" And I texted back "I promise". Then she sent me a ":)" and that was it. We haven't texted or talked since.

 

WTF is going on? I don't understand. If she doesn't want me back, why is she acting like that? Why is she trying to get my attention in the club and text me? I had tried to get her back in the past and she didn't want me. And she knows I want her back. I'm guessing she's still dealing with her current situation with her little boyfriend. I know you guys are going to tell me to remain in NC, but I am just wondering if anyone has some insight on this?

[reddragon588]

Yes, it's a game because you turned it into one. It's also a game with no winners.

 

What she's sending you are called breadcrumbs. They're feelers, no substance.

[Rick1]

How did I turn it in to one? What do you suggest I do to get the situation to turn in my favor?

[reddragon588]

It's not about having it "in your favor" or anything. It's life, just live it.

 

I would not respond to her unless she gives you something more concrete than breadcrumbs about how you're doing. She's leading you on.

[Simon Phoenix]

How did I turn it in to one? What do you suggest I do to get the situation to turn in my favor?

 

Stop eating the breadcrumbs for one.

[Rick1]

Alright. That's pretty much how I was planning on handling this. It's just confusing.

[Rick1]

So just ignore her completely from this point forward?

[Rick1]

llllllllll

[hurts2death]

run away to save your ass man

 

dont get that low.

go nc all the way or you become trapped and then ask heartbreak advice from us.

 

wish you can do it

 

john