lillybear1 Posted September 15, 2013 Posted September 15, 2013 Hey! Thanks for reading! Backstory: I'm 20. He's 23. So, I've been on four dates with this guy, but really, 3 close together time-wise. Our first one was way back in June. Anyway, I know he likes me. He told me. But, as far as any sort of physical closeness...nothing. Maybe it's just me and I am giving off the wrong signals. I'm not sure. Anyway, the first even little bit of physical closeness we've had (besides hugs at the end of each date) was at a concert we went to last night. We stood very close together and our arms would often touch. However, he's made no move to hold my hand, much less kiss me. I'm really scared to take the initiative. It's been a while since I've soberly kissed someone, and I guess I'm just REALLY nervous. Any ways I can tell him/show him that I want that without having to actually do it myself? Side note: we JUST told each other officially that we were into each other via text last night. I haven't seen him since, so who knows? It might correct itself now that he knows for sure that I like him. But, I'm not sure.
TB Rhine Posted September 15, 2013 Posted September 15, 2013 Via text, eh? You kids these days are awfully bold. ;-) Seriously, the guy sounds like he's either in the closet or extremely timid. Don't discount the latter: there have been girls I was very, *very* into that I lacked the courage to physically engage with. It's just a thing some guys have trouble with. If you don't take the initiative to at least TELL him what you want, he may never get there on his own. If you DO initiate something physically, and he shies away or tries to put things on hold, I'd lean more toward the 'in the closet' explanation. I've heard of girls being strung along for years by self-deluded young gay men. Don't be some guy's beard. 1
tinydancer93 Posted September 15, 2013 Posted September 15, 2013 I agree with TB Rhine. He is probably very nervous, much like you. The next time you see him, if he doesn't make any sort of move, playfully say "Aren't you gonna kiss me?". Some guys need a LOT of encouragement because they are often oblivious to body language and flirting. Many guys need to be sure that they aren't going to be rejected before they make a move. As you said, now that you've both established that you like each other, things might change. 1
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