CrazyAndre Posted September 14, 2013 Posted September 14, 2013 Hey, im not going to go super in the details and try keep my story as short as i can, but it concludes with me not knowing wtf to do. I've dated this girl for almost a year back in the day about 4 years ago... I was really happy back then, she was my first, she was perfect, she was one of the few people who truly understands me and who i am and still is one of the few people (rly introverted). But after about a year i started giving her less attention, i started feeling sort of bored of her... even though she's exactly what i want... as if the spark of love was drawn out of me. She eventually dumped my ass. Now about a year ago she wanted me back so bad, i even (sort of) went back with her for 3 weeks, but it was still the same... I felt bad and trapped since she gave me so much of her love... and i couldn't give her any of mine... I swear to god my mind wants this women so bad... but my heart just doesn't see eye to eye.. This is where my problem actually starts and is why i am here tonight, writing this message down and looking for help.. When i have her... i feel trapped, and i feel like this isn't suppose to be cause i still have this bored feeling of her... and when i don't have her... I feel miserable, i hate myself for denying such a good women (it feels like im saying no to the girl who is suppose to be my soulmate since i can't see myself meeting a better girl than that), and i end up wanting her back again.. It's like no matter what decision i take (weither i say yes or no to her), the outcome is unhappiness... And now about a week ago she came back into my life, and told me she still wanted me... Spent a night with her (hugs, kisses, cuddling, everything)... And now i feel like i've made a mistake... as if i was reminded of the reason why i had said no to her last year... And now i feel absolutely miserable again, because i know that if i refuse her again this time, i'll just end up wanting her again and hating myself for it... I ****ing hate myself for being like this, giving this girl high hopes and then just shattering everything... Sorry for making this so long when i said i was going to make this short but this really is as short as it can be... It just sums up to: -When i have her, i don't want her -When i don't have her, i want her Im so messed up...
barky2 Posted September 14, 2013 Posted September 14, 2013 Read your last 2 sentences ....I've been there. Its called the chase. Its not love. Cut it loose and find someone you love . Barky
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