TheDovic Posted September 13, 2013 Posted September 13, 2013 Been single for a while now. Am not bad looking and am a relatively successful 30 yr old male. Would like to try a dating website but am a bit nervous. Has anyone tried dating this way in the past and if so what was your experience like? Thanks to anyone who replies
nescafe1982 Posted September 13, 2013 Posted September 13, 2013 I'm a 30 yo woman. Met my current BF of 2.5 years on OkCupid. Have many friends who also met their SOs there. I never had an excruciatingly bad date from OkC. Lots of so-so first dates that never went anywhere, but I did meet several good men and ultimately got together long term with one of them. Furthermore, my BF and I NEVER would have met in "real" life. We're both in higher ed and from the same city, but his crowd (sciences) never mixes with mine (humanities). The point of online dating is to cast the net widely and meet people from very different walks of life. On the whole, I was happy with the experience. 1
mammasita Posted September 13, 2013 Posted September 13, 2013 Yep, I do it. You'll hear from people on both sides of the fence: 1) On line dating sucks 2) On line dating is fine I say, give it a try. You never know - don't rule it out, keep an open mind. I do it because I'm not extremely social, I work full time and am a single mother. Good luck 1
Keenly Posted September 13, 2013 Posted September 13, 2013 Yep, I do it. You'll hear from people on both sides of the fence: 1) On line dating sucks 2) On line dating is fine I say, give it a try. You never know - don't rule it out, keep an open mind. I do it because I'm not extremely social, I work full time and am a single mother. Good luck Because the experience for women and the experience for men are the polar opposite of each other. 1
mammasita Posted September 13, 2013 Posted September 13, 2013 Because the experience for women and the experience for men are the polar opposite of each other. If more women were like me, OLD would be a better place for men then 1
soccerrprp Posted September 13, 2013 Posted September 13, 2013 Been single for a while now. Am not bad looking and am a relatively successful 30 yr old male. Would like to try a dating website but am a bit nervous. Has anyone tried dating this way in the past and if so what was your experience like? Thanks to anyone who replies TheDovic, You have 720 posts here and you haven't read or followed the many threads on OLD? I have been pleased. It's the only way that I date(d). I am with someone that I fricken' adore from OLD. There are those who will poo-poo it, but it's not inherently as bad as some make it out to be. Just remember that your date is likely contacting or multi-dating others. Not all, but many do. Good luck. 2
nescafe1982 Posted September 13, 2013 Posted September 13, 2013 ...I've met 5 crazies now. I'm sure there's good people but 90% are rebounding/ trying toget laid/ unstable.. Yeah, there is *that* element, so careful screening is necessary. When I say I never went on a bad OLD date, it's true. But I did get lots of dick pics, crazy guys, abusive guys, nasty messages, and more than a couple of swingers/polyamours/dramatic types/wannabe cheaters. I just didn't reply to those messages, and vetted the people I like carefully before meeting them in person. So I guess I say my experience was net-positive, but of course I had to ignore a lot of questionable stuff in my inbox. The only real downside I experienced was people I knew (like coworkers and even my uncle at one point) happened upon my profile. That was awkward.
gaius Posted September 13, 2013 Posted September 13, 2013 Because the experience for women and the experience for men are the polar opposite of each other. Not always. I think if you're in decent shape, know how to be interesting and confident with women and put some work into your profile picture and make your text unique you'll do ok. You can even get women winking and messaging you. Not talking about you keenly but I'll see guys here complain about old and at the same time have the douchiest looking profile picture of themselves. That isn't sexual whatsoever. Or you can tell by the way they type they give off a bad vibe. Im pretty sure they're carrying all that over to their old communications and dont even seem to realize it. 2
soccerrprp Posted September 13, 2013 Posted September 13, 2013 Haha I'm done online dating. I've met 5 crazies now I'm sure there's good people but 90% are rebounding/ trying toget laid/ unstable. That leaves a 10% chance Ain't nobody got time for that I've met 0 crazies, so don't know what to say...
StanMusial Posted September 13, 2013 Posted September 13, 2013 TheDovic, You have 720 posts here and you haven't read or followed the many threads on OLD? Good luck. No kidding. I'm thinking its a troll. Either way, in the event this is a real question, my advice would be if you have other options DON'T do it. 1
soccerrprp Posted September 13, 2013 Posted September 13, 2013 Maybe you use a different site? haha if you're implying it's me you're incorrect I screen them by talking for a while over the phone I used pof No, not implying it's you at all. Many factors: 1. age group 2. location 3. etc. etc. etc. I've used POF and dated three ladies that were sane. Didn't work out of course, but they were not crazy.
Keenly Posted September 13, 2013 Posted September 13, 2013 Not always. I think if you're in decent shape, know how to be interesting and confident with women and put some work into your profile picture and make your text unique you'll do ok. You can even get women winking and messaging you. Not talking about you keenly but I'll see guys here complain about old and at the same time have the douchiest looking profile picture of themselves. That isn't sexual whatsoever. Or you can tell by the way they type they give off a bad vibe. Im pretty sure they're carrying all that over to their old communications and dont even seem to realize it. I think for me its because I can't fill out my profile or talk about myself to save my life.
soccerrprp Posted September 13, 2013 Posted September 13, 2013 Ohhh I see lol I'm a girl Thats the main difference here okay, so that may explain the difference in experience... 1
MrCastle Posted September 13, 2013 Posted September 13, 2013 (edited) Not always. I think if you're in decent shape, know how to be interesting and confident with women and put some work into your profile picture and make your text unique you'll do ok. You can even get women winking and messaging you.[/Quote] I don't think so. My online dating luck (emphasis on the word luck) has been terrible for my entire experience. The girls I get in real life (highly attractive [to me], good personalities) compared to what I get online (nothing) is pretty stark. I am both a photographer and a writer. My photos look professional, and my profiles are always cleverly written and witty. I'd venture to say I put a little bit more effort into it than the average man. The only messages I've gotten from women (few) were from ones I didn't find attractive. But I guess that's something a lot of us deal with. Getting attention from those you don't want and being ignored by those you do want. I will say though that it is probably a numbers game and being active I'm sure is also part of it. I use a sniper rifle, not a shotgun. Meaning in a week's time I may have sent messages to two different girls as opposed to 15-20. I know what I like. So I only messaged girls that fit my admittedly tight criteria. No dice. It was only supposed to be a supplement to my real life dating life but it failed to give me anything good so I dropped it. Not worth the headaches when I am doing fine in real life. I think that's how it should be treated though. As a supplement. If you are spending hours of your day on those sites, then you are replacing it with real life interactions, and a good majority of people do much better in real life than they do online. Edited September 13, 2013 by MrCastle
Author TheDovic Posted September 14, 2013 Author Posted September 14, 2013 Wow, lots of replies. Thanks everyone. It looks like the majority have good experiences so I'll go for it. Cheers 1
tinydancer93 Posted September 14, 2013 Posted September 14, 2013 Been single for a while now. Am not bad looking and am a relatively successful 30 yr old male. Would like to try a dating website but am a bit nervous. Has anyone tried dating this way in the past and if so what was your experience like? Thanks to anyone who replies I say go for it. I've used dating sites in the past and they are great fun. Just by checking out someone's profile, you can easily determine whether they are compatible with you or not, at least in theory. The only downside is that you get some losers who message you, but they are easy to weed out from the good ones.
Mliu Posted September 15, 2013 Posted September 15, 2013 Am I the only who doesn't get replies from ladies? I'm on okcupid and message loads of ladies. . Even the unattractive ones and none replies. I'm sure my message isn't that weak, I just message them about their profile and find a link between mine. Been on it for 5 month and only got one message and that's not even a reply.
soccerrprp Posted September 15, 2013 Posted September 15, 2013 Am I the only who doesn't get replies from ladies? I'm on okcupid and message loads of ladies. . Even the unattractive ones and none replies. I'm sure my message isn't that weak, I just message them about their profile and find a link between mine. Been on it for 5 month and only got one message and that's not even a reply. Mliu, I've found that the messages are not as important as many of the ladies make them out to be. There are other visual cues, characteristics that need to entice them first and then the profile. Believe me, I went to simply asking them if they'd be interested in chatting and was as or more successful that way then writing some contrived, winded message to impress.
Sum12Luv Posted September 15, 2013 Posted September 15, 2013 Yes. I haven't had any luck yet. Try match.com or zoosk.com. I know 3 people that had success.
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