lowbattery Posted September 13, 2013 Posted September 13, 2013 When I was involved in divorce a lady from my work approached me and said she always had feelings for me but we were never single at the same time. She is in 10+ year marriage. I don't see her leaving it. We talked and talked and she was very helpful to me through divorce. One thing led to another and we got overly involved. Meeting before and after work, emails, phone calls... For the past 2 1/2 years we have been on again off again. We both know it is wrong. She tries to get involved in her marriage but it is rocky to begin with. I have dated a few different girls. They are good relationships but not great. We see each other on a regular basis through work and have known each other for 15+ years. We are currently making our best yet attempt to stop but I am miserable and she is showing signs of the same. I don't want it to start up again, I can't handle the ups and downs. The roller coaster is terrible to be on. Every night she goes home to someone else. It isn't a fun feeling. We both know it is wrong. I am sure she won't leave marriage. I have trouble getting into other relationships when she is in the back of my mind. When we are on it is the most addictive high I have found and that is what makes it tough. One look or comment or text or email can light things back up again but I don't think that is in either of our best interests. Ideas on stopping?
ConcreteHeart Posted September 13, 2013 Posted September 13, 2013 Welcome Low Battery. All I can say is you can stop this merry-go-round. It is difficult and it will take time, but for your sake, you need to be done. No Contact is what most people on this board do. It is tough and is like giving up a drug. Like quiting any addiction you will need to go through withdrawal. It hurts, it's not comfortable, it's hard. What I did was get a good therapist. I am going once a week and that is where I cry, yell, scream. We also work on plans to move forward. I started No Contact on Monday after months of trying keep things going, trying to be friends on his terms, wishing he would change his mind. But here I am. Just tring to do this one day at time.
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