Brown-Eyez Posted September 12, 2013 Posted September 12, 2013 Is it really so bad to reach out and see if there is anything left? i miss him so much and would love to just talk to him tomorrow is his Dad's b-day, maybe a short text just to say Hi? He's been away and I know he's back in town, it would be so great to see him!
JDPT Posted September 12, 2013 Posted September 12, 2013 It will be a terrible thing and utterly detrimental for YOU. Fight the urge, you are experiencing a weak moment. It's irrelevant whose birthday it is you need to look out for yourself and no one else. Get through this moment you will feel more empowered when you do. 1
forgetmenot75 Posted September 12, 2013 Posted September 12, 2013 Reach to him if you have the urge. He'll probably had moved on. the only thing you'll have to lose is all the hard work you've done so far. you'll be again on day 1 if things don't go as you expect. 1
Author Brown-Eyez Posted September 12, 2013 Author Posted September 12, 2013 Really? It will be that bad? what if he's been missing me and doesn't know how to approach me? shouldn't i just try alittle?
forgetmenot75 Posted September 12, 2013 Posted September 12, 2013 It's not probable he doesn't know how to approach you. If he wants you, he'll look for you like crazy. Has he made any attempt so far? 1
mtnbiker3000 Posted September 12, 2013 Posted September 12, 2013 Don't do it!! You will not get the result you want. You will feel terrible and undo all of your hard work. Do NOT do it!!! 1
Author Brown-Eyez Posted September 12, 2013 Author Posted September 12, 2013 It's not probable he doesn't know how to approach you. If he wants you, he'll look for you like crazy. Has he made any attempt so far? no, he hasn't reached out but i miss him so bad maybe he just needs some contact from me?
Simon Phoenix Posted September 12, 2013 Posted September 12, 2013 Really? It will be that bad? what if he's been missing me and doesn't know how to approach me? shouldn't i just try alittle? He broke up with you, it's up to him to try. Don't be pathetic. 2
forgetmenot75 Posted September 12, 2013 Posted September 12, 2013 no, he hasn't reached out but i miss him so bad maybe he just needs some contact from me? Maybe you need to test it for yourself. I guess you won't have the answer you're looking for. Have you keep no contact for at least 60 days? If not, I'd highly recommend you to refrain from contacting him now 1
Simon Phoenix Posted September 12, 2013 Posted September 12, 2013 This is also some important information to consider. Dumper's prerogative to contact, dumpee's prerogrative to answer. If she was over it, I'd tell her to go for it if she wants. But right now she's running into a samurai sword. Plus it's absolutely illogical to think that he'd be afraid to contact her after not being afraid to break her heart. 2
Author Brown-Eyez Posted September 12, 2013 Author Posted September 12, 2013 He broke up with you, it's up to him to try. Don't be pathetic. i don't want to be pathetic but maybe sincere?? who can resist sincere? maybe he has rethunk his decision
forgetmenot75 Posted September 12, 2013 Posted September 12, 2013 He broke up with you, it's up to him to try. Don't be pathetic. Simon, let her bump against the wall if that is what she wants. We already told her he won't receive the answer she's looking for, but sometimes she'll need to test it for herself... 2
forgetmenot75 Posted September 12, 2013 Posted September 12, 2013 i don't want to be pathetic but maybe sincere?? who can resist sincere? maybe he has rethunk his decision omg, NO! Sincere?? You're gonna be hurt in 5, 4, 3,....
Author Brown-Eyez Posted September 12, 2013 Author Posted September 12, 2013 If she was over it, I'd tell her to go for it if she wants. But right now she's running into a samurai sword. Plus it's absolutely illogical to think that he'd be afraid to contact her after not being afraid to break her heart. samurai sword? no, that i don't need or want.. man, I miss him bad tonight
Simon Phoenix Posted September 12, 2013 Posted September 12, 2013 i don't want to be pathetic but maybe sincere?? who can resist sincere? maybe he has rethunk his decision Stop being foolish. If he rethunk his position he'd be contacting you.
Simon Phoenix Posted September 12, 2013 Posted September 12, 2013 Sociopaths. OP, your mind is made up, I can tell. You'll get no discouragement from me. Go forth. Give it a red hot crack. I'm guessing she's very young, because she comes off as awfully naive.
mtnbiker3000 Posted September 12, 2013 Posted September 12, 2013 Why let her suffer unnecessarily because she is having a weak moment? We KNOW this is not a smart idea. I say NO NO NO. It is a bad, bad idea!!! 1
Simon Phoenix Posted September 12, 2013 Posted September 12, 2013 Yeah, i'm not going to tell her to run into traffic on the highway so she can test it out.
reddragon588 Posted September 12, 2013 Posted September 12, 2013 i don't want to be pathetic but maybe sincere?? who can resist sincere? maybe he has rethunk his decision If he had rethought it, he would have reached out by now. Don't contact him tomorrow. If he's not over it, if he's having the feelings you wonder if he's having, he'll probably say something to you about why you didn't say anything. I'm willing to bet he doesn't. I didn't contact my ex on her birthday. Nothing.
Author Brown-Eyez Posted September 12, 2013 Author Posted September 12, 2013 ok ok ok that's why i posted here first just wanted to see if maybe maaaybe it wouldn't be the worse idea i hate to be textbook but everyone clearly sees my contacting him as a very wrong move i'll stay strong thank you for talking me out of it as much as i want to i won't i hurt so bad already I don't want more misery:sick: 2
mtnbiker3000 Posted September 12, 2013 Posted September 12, 2013 ok ok ok that's why i posted here first just wanted to see if maybe maaaybe it wouldn't be the worse idea i hate to be textbook but everyone clearly sees my contacting him as a very wrong move i'll stay strong thank you for talking me out of it as much as i want to i won't i hurt so bad already I don't want more misery:sick: Mission accomplished!!! Count your lucky stars you checked here first!!! 1
mtnbiker3000 Posted September 12, 2013 Posted September 12, 2013 I know it's a ridiculous idea. But sometimes you have to touch the stove to know it's hot. She's not asking for people to talk her off the ledge. Did you notice that? She hasn't asked for someone to pull her back. She's going to do this anyway. And if she needs to experience in order to learn, I am all for that. She can come back her and we can support her when it goes wrong. She's not endangering her life and this supportive community exists if she has a crash-landing. I'm not against learning by doing. She knows it's a bad idea. I don't need to tell her. Meh. It's unnecessary pain. I rather try and head it off before hand then console her afterwards... 1
Author Brown-Eyez Posted September 12, 2013 Author Posted September 12, 2013 Mission accomplished!!! Count your lucky stars you checked here first!!! maybe I'll never know what my lucky stars were.. but there is alot of wisdom here that i can't deny I'm stupid and an idiot and miss him like crazy and want him back but IF my reaching out will just cause me pain i gotta avoid that
Author Brown-Eyez Posted September 12, 2013 Author Posted September 12, 2013 The only way I really learned the value of NC, was by breaking it. 100 opinions about how wrong it was taught me some, but the heartache of breaking it taught me everything I needed to know. That's life. the one thing I DONT NEED IS MORE HEARTACHE somehow i was hoping if i took the matter into my own hands maybe it would mean a better outcome guess i was wrong? 1
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