Cali408 Posted September 11, 2013 Posted September 11, 2013 I think on this forum, some fall in one, most fall in two and three. Those that fall in 2 break NC, those in 3 struggle but are fighting the good fight. Everyone should strive for # 4. Where do you fall? I"m at 3.5 right now. The 4 Stages Defined Sometimes called the "Learning Ladder," the four stages illustrated above are borrowed from the field of Neurolinguistic Programming (NLP). This concept has been applied to everything from success in business to success with bedding supermodels. Here's a breakdown: Stage #1: Unconscious Incompetence – You're doing something wrong and you don't even know it. Blissful ignorance. Stage #2: Conscious Incompetence – You're doing something wrong, you know it, but you either can't or won't change. Stage #3: Conscious Competence – You're doing something right or productive, but it's a struggle. You make the right choices and do the things that will lead you to your goal, but it's a daily mental battle. Stage #4: Unconscious Competence – You're doing everything right without really having to think about it. The right actions and decisions are now second nature 4
JDPT Posted September 11, 2013 Posted September 11, 2013 After roughly 4 months of being dumped, I'm definitely stuck on 3, have one more level to go. 1
reddragon588 Posted September 11, 2013 Posted September 11, 2013 I think I'm at 2.5. I'm doing a lot right, and I'm still in a struggle like stage 3, but I'm also making my share of mistakes that I'm still aware of. Just have to keep working to move forward. 2
Helloprincess Posted September 11, 2013 Posted September 11, 2013 Its been 3 months after the brekaup and im on stage 3. So hard :'(
travelonic Posted September 11, 2013 Posted September 11, 2013 IMO, the problem with these stages is just how much pigeonholing goes on... particularly evident with the names of each stage, and the concrete images they invoke... for example, personally I think just because one breaks NC doesn't mean you are consciously, or subconsciously incompetent - there are some gray areas I've seen so far as having to break it - specific interactions like to tell an ex to stop bugging you if you requested NC and she keeps bugging you, causing you to break it to tell her off,.... hope that makes sense.
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