Cindels Posted September 11, 2013 Posted September 11, 2013 Having lived through more than a handful of breakups, this particular one is by far the hardest!! I met my ex in 2010 at a wedding and we had what most would call the most perfect relationship, we never fought and our personalities complimented each other perfectly. It was truly a match made in heaven! So you would wonder why did we breakup? Well like many other people I have been diagnosed with a common skin disorder called Keratosis Pilaris, although not harmful it is more of a cosmetic problem, with unsightly red bumps on the back of your arms, thighs, buttocks and in severe cases it can spread throughout the whole body. This ultimately affected my self esteem that caused me to shy away from my ex's advances to be intimate and his romantic gestures. I lived in fear that he might discover these small bumps on my arms and thighs, thus I never allowed him to see me naked or wear sleeveless tops in his presence. Him being so attractive and physically fit I couldn't bare to think how he would react if he would see them. In a nutshell this caused my ex to became distant and I had to endure the pain of seeing him slowly detaching himself from me emotionally as he became less and less affectionate till the end. The breakup was civil but what kills me most is the fact that he is still friendly towards me and tries to support me through this, I know I should stay away but every fiber in my body tells me to fight for this man!! I am a firm believer of NC and always followed it with my past boyfriends, but this ex of mine never treated me ill and our breakup was because of my insecurities which led him to believe that I don't love him. I plan to make this right and fight till the end, I won't beg and I won't sacrifice my dignity but I will win his heart back!
Philosoraptor Posted September 13, 2013 Posted September 13, 2013 It seems that you've realized that the issue is your self esteem and that pushing him away only worsened the issue. If he is still supporting you, then he obviously still cares for you. If you want to try again you need to sit him down and open up about all of this, from how you feel he would have thought about you to why you pushed him away. If you talk maturely and truly can let this go (if he wants to try again), you may be able to make a positive second chance out of this. 1
RiceaRoni Posted September 13, 2013 Posted September 13, 2013 I understand how you feel. I have the same skin condition and Yes it can take a toll towards your self esteem, but its much more worth it opening up and telling the person you're with rather than to risk losing them. I used to be afraid as well. And didn't want any intimate contact with my arms or thighs, and when I had told a bf i used to have why I was uncomfortable he told me he still loved me no matter what. Love is loving the person no matter what they have. So I say sit him down and tell him why, hopefully he'll understand and you two can have a second chance at this..possibly even a better one. Goodluck dear. 1
Something123 Posted September 13, 2013 Posted September 13, 2013 I know the problem is diferent and there is a bit of a age diference, but when i was younger i had severe acne (i still have some), i was embarassed of myself, my self esteem was very low, but i learned to live with it, and the time passed and i learned to no care about that, and to be myself to the fullest (even though im still a shy person). You have an advantage with that skin disorder, you can see who truly cares about you and who can see you past your appearance, i know its sounds cliché but its true, if she truly cares about you, you shouldnt be worried. If she dumps you because of that, you will know she doesnt deserve this relationship. Just my opinion, and sorry for my english.
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