bbcaptcha Posted September 11, 2013 Posted September 11, 2013 Hi, So here it goes. I knew this guy a year ago, he worked in a company where I was a trainee for like 6 months or so. We took bus together, his office was right next to mine so we had the chance to talk several times. In different occasions I saw him staring in secret, he approaches me all the time, and he enjoys talking to me but never made any obvious step. When I finished my training, He sent me message on Facebook followed by a friend request. Since then we talk from time to time about general stuff. A week ago, he asked for my phone number I gave him, then he asked me if I'm single. At this point I didn't know what to say, well yes I'm single but I don't want to say it in a desperate way. So I kept turning around until I said it. He stopped talking to me for two days then he talked back. This time he told me that he wants to make a new family and stuff like that then he asked me what are my future projects I told him that I want to have a good career and he was like what about romance, I said yeah I want to have my own little family too. Next thing he asked me when can he see me I changed the subject because I felt like he is rushing things so he didn't get back to that subject again. Then we kept talking about usual general stuff until I ended the conversation and he was like "take care, see you soon". I want to mention that the whole conversation went through Facebook. I don't even know why he took my phone number if he wasn't willing to call. It has been a week since this conversation, I see him posting things but didn't text me again. Well his behavior kept me wondering, would that be normal ? If so why would guys do such things? As I know him, he is not the kind of shy guy ... I'm a bit confused here I'm not showing that I'm too available neither pushing it too far, I'm the kind of friendly girl. Lately I had few guys approaching and making hints and once I react they simply vanish into thin air the only ones that stayed around are the apparently desperate ones that I pushed away without hurting their feelings!!! It seems that I still don't get this dating game after all ...
Philosoraptor Posted September 11, 2013 Posted September 11, 2013 He showed interest and once you didn't reciprocate he moved on to the next girl. The "he wants to make a new family" was a little forward though, kinda creepy.
truth_seeker Posted September 11, 2013 Posted September 11, 2013 He was digging and you gave him a vibe that you weren't that much interested in him. He bailed. It's funny: when a guy senses women are not that into them, they disappear. When its the other way around, women will make it a point to stick it to them, then disappear
Author bbcaptcha Posted September 11, 2013 Author Posted September 11, 2013 Believe me I don't like it either. I'm just not sure about the guy's way of thinking. As you see it was not me who started playing this game. He wasn't direct right from the beginning causing this confusion. Besides, some few times before I tried to SAY IT and I ended up embarrassed, I even got asked out, one guy kept insisting and I was busy for real until the moment he invited me out and I accepted he called later and declined and never called again. Humans in general are not mind readers not only men, and women are more sensible to these matters than men you know. So it seems like I'm a bit lost here, what should I have done instead of trying to make sure that he is truthful and he really means what he says ?
clia Posted September 11, 2013 Posted September 11, 2013 I don't see why you think he was playing games. He friended you on Facebook. He asked you for your number. He asked you if you were single. He asked you out. You declined, so he moved on. If anything, you are the one playing games. Hi,A week ago, he asked for my phone number I gave him, then he asked me if I'm single. At this point I didn't know what to say, well yes I'm single but I don't want to say it in a desperate way. So I kept turning around until I said it. Game playing. There is nothing desperate about saying "yes" when a guy asks you if you are single. He was asking because he was trying to figure out whether he could ask you out on a date. He stopped talking to me for two days then he talked back. You also stopped talking to him. Next thing he asked me when can he see me I changed the subject because I felt like he is rushing things so he didn't get back to that subject again. And bam...you rejected him. I don't even know why he took my phone number if he wasn't willing to call. It has been a week since this conversation, I see him posting things but didn't text me again. And obviously you didn't text him either. As I know him, he is not the kind of shy guy ... I'm a bit confused here I'm not showing that I'm too available neither pushing it too far, I'm the kind of friendly girl. You don't seem to be showing that you are available at all, or interested in him at all.
omarthedude Posted September 11, 2013 Posted September 11, 2013 I can totally relate to this since I'm going through the same thing he's going through. I hit it off really well with this great girl in my college class but the next day she talked to every guy BUT me. And I'm that guy she couldn't let go off the day before. I even texted her something funny during class and she ignored it. I simply went, 'Oh well, NEXT!' Word of advice: Text HIM! It may be your last chance if you're actually interested in him. And I think you kinda are because he kept you wondering. Indirectly, it means you MISS him. What are you waiting for?
Author bbcaptcha Posted September 12, 2013 Author Posted September 12, 2013 Well first I suppose I should thank you guys. This is the first time I post here and I feel like your answers are quite detailed and significant, especially you Clia you made me feel somehow guilty by stating exactly what I have done. But as I told you, I had some miserable experiences that happened just by behaving normally and being as spontaneous as possible: I got dumped, some guys vanished as well without leaving any hint. So I became a bit conservative concerning showing my real personality. Though I'm very friendly and smiling and have some very nice friends. Anyway, so showing that I'm interested in a guy became something hard for me, I feel like I need to make sure he is serious ... So what if I kinda like this one, is it too late ? how can I do about that ?
Recommended Posts