miss_jaclynrae Posted September 9, 2013 Posted September 9, 2013 Sex in the relationship isnt something I personally would make a deal breaker. I personally see it as anything else, compromise and communication. There are certain things I like to do that the mister doesn't. Sex is still great because it is him,and over all we agree on most things. To each thier own though.
miss_jaclynrae Posted September 9, 2013 Posted September 9, 2013 One would think because he ejaculates so quickly he would be thankful for your "sounds" to maybe prolong his performance. Bad sex is completely a deal breaker for me because it will not get better only worse. Next! I totally disagree with this. 1
Brown-Eyez Posted September 11, 2013 Posted September 11, 2013 Yes, I'd dump them and tell them why in the process. There's no reason to sugar coat things when it's ended. and this ^^ is why there is so many heartbroken people in this incredibly disposable society we now live in.. ONE offense and they should be dumped ??? this attitude terrifies me very few people in this thread have suggested to the OP that she should TALK with him FIRST about the situation rather than immediately leave him.. 1
BradJacobs Posted September 11, 2013 Posted September 11, 2013 and this ^^ is why there is so many heartbroken people in this incredibly disposable society we now live in.. ONE offense and they should be dumped ??? this attitude terrifies me very few people in this thread have suggested to the OP that she should TALK with him FIRST about the situation rather than immediately leave him.. Tigers rarely change their stripes. This man sounds like a sexual prude and has PE to boot.
soccerrprp Posted September 11, 2013 Posted September 11, 2013 Love it when my gf makes sounds and louder, the better! Sex can get better if it's just an issue of lasting longer. He can work on that and you can help. 1
candie13 Posted September 11, 2013 Posted September 11, 2013 hum... in my case, a guy has two chances to impress me in the sack. If the second time was just as disappointing as the first time, I won't stick around longer. in your case, you've stuck around 5- 6 times, it means it's not that bad. maybe your feelings were hurt because of his behavior? I mean, the guy lives on his own, he invites a girl over and the girl cannot manifest herself? What sort of a guy is that?!? Sorry, it is his mission to please you - and it seems he ain't doing that much of it either. It's hard to "talk" about these matters, but discuss, if you feel there's anything that can be saved. Unfortunately, this means you need to change the power game: - he thinks he's the king, in control, thus telling you what to do - the reality is he's finishing fast and you aren't that impressed to begin with If you think you can get game back, fine, talk. Explain. Guys who don't understand that they need to please (and that they suck at doing so) are hardly understanding. Most of the times, they have an overinflated ego about themselves and their bedroom abilities. God knows why... I say dump him. why? "It's just not working out". You don't owe him anything (I mean, he slept with you 5 times, he should be pleased).
soccerrprp Posted September 11, 2013 Posted September 11, 2013 I would like to know if it was ever good? 5x....is it a matter of him not "knowing" what you require? He's too fast? Again, if you really like him and you are willing (and he) to "help" him, it can be done. I always hear from the ladies how guys are dreadfully lacking in the fore-play, stamina arena, but they can be improved with practice. 1
stormy_1011 Posted September 11, 2013 Posted September 11, 2013 I'm in the same position, the sex is horrific but he's a nice guy. However, there's lots of nice guys who are amazing in bed so why settle?? Follow your heart but take your brain with you and remember he most likely WON'T get better over time.
kenneth1010 Posted September 14, 2013 Posted September 14, 2013 So many " full cups " in here it beggars belief. Cant change, wont get any better, jesus, why not just shoot the guy and bury him now? very few people in this thread have suggested to the OP that she should TALK with him FIRST about the situation rather than immediately leave him.. He probably thinks he isn't doing anything wrong. If he refuses to change his "technique", then yes by all means, its game over. Lack of communication always causes problems. In everything. Sooner people realize this the easier things get.
Eddy B Posted September 14, 2013 Posted September 14, 2013 Dating someone new and the sex has been okay. Just okay. Keep hoping it will get better. And then yesterday while having sex he keeps telling me to be quiet. I'm too loud. Talk about ruining the moment. Express your feelings about it. Tell him that you want to be loud and this is how it's going to be. Give yourself a period of time to check whether the sex gets better and if it doesn't: BYE BYEEEE
MissBee Posted September 14, 2013 Posted September 14, 2013 Dating someone new and the sex has been okay. Just okay. Keep hoping it will get better. And then yesterday while having sex he keeps telling me to be quiet. I'm too loud. Talk about ruining the moment. This wouldn't work for me...wtf??!! I mean when I've had sex in a risque context and I'm getting too loud then the guy will tell me shhh and to keep it down, but if it's not in a context like that, then I've never been silenced during sex. There are things that can be worked on and things that can't and in considering being serious about someone sexually compatibility is important. If his style was something that was a turn off for me or if what I liked was a turn off for him, I'd not bother with getting serious.
spiderowl Posted September 15, 2013 Posted September 15, 2013 Yes, if you are not compatible in that area and he's trying to crush your enthusiasm too, then what is the point? Sexual incompatibility leads to avoidance later on and avoidance leads to affairs, which lead to extreme distress, mistrust and divorce. No point starting out with such a fundamental incompatibility.
Steves54 Posted September 15, 2013 Posted September 15, 2013 I have been married for 30 years now. I do love my wife but the physical part of the relationship went out the window about 12 years ago. After getting married this part of the relationship stared to change then came the kids and then more changes. My desires are very strong and she has none at this point. However she is a wife and the mother of our children and at this point in life I need to be there for her. I have lost something in life that I will never get back and this I regret. This has led to another woman ( same situation ), we help each other meet our needs. But I must say without the emotions it is just not the same. If your heart is into the relationship then talk and try to find out what is not working if that doesnt work than dont wait till its to late. The empty feeeling I have I wish I would have made a change years ago when I could.
ChessPieceFace Posted September 15, 2013 Posted September 15, 2013 Too loud because he didn't want people to hear, perhaps?
Recommended Posts