moosekaka Posted September 9, 2013 Posted September 9, 2013 (edited) I am obsessed with how well my ex is doing in terms of work and career to the point it is driving me to think of switching fields (we are both in the same line of work). Even though I have not seen or had contact with her for 1.5 years and she has just started grad school in another state her work and name comes up and I am sure will become more and more prominent as her career progresses. I feel emasculated and resentful of her success, I know how beta this makes me look and how shallow it sounds but I cant help it. I keep thinking I wished I had chosen a different path in life, a different trade/career. Appreciate any feedback but really I am just venting. I cant stop thinking about this and it is driving me mad (again). PS: I guess after some thought what it really boils down to is that I dont think I am very good or am suited for this line of work and my resentment at a stranger's success/failure is my subconscious way of telling me this. Perhaps I am also using her as an excuse to not try harder and to excuse my failure by blaming my loss of confidence on her. At some point though life is passing me by and I am not getting younger. I think I need to decide firmly whether to sink or swim pretty damn soon. Edited September 9, 2013 by moosekaka
Oldcatskinner Posted September 9, 2013 Posted September 9, 2013 Hey, You get it! You should feel emasculated. Not because of her success, but because you are letting the thought of her success determine your feelings! I firmly believe that if you really loved a person, then you will be happy for their success. Now, go out and succeed for yourself!
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