thewrongonee Posted September 8, 2013 Posted September 8, 2013 (edited) Hello loveshack, hope you are doing great today! I need help making a desicion about a girl im seeing. We've been seeing each other and talking for a while now and i feel like we've hit a slum. How we initially started: i met her in a class and from there we started to talk more and more. When i told her how i started likin her she told me that she recently left a 7 year relationship. ( she moved away, can never see him and she broke it off, they would fight over texts often too). She said that shes not ready for a commitment, she wants to be single. But we both expressed how we like each other and flirt everyday and have those long special moments when we go out. When she told me she wants us to be the same, no commitments ( friends) i told her no and said this will be the last time we'd see each other because of my feelings. She was crying as she and i left, he kept textin me but injust ignored. The next day we met up ( because she kept texting me) and she told me she dosent want to lose me, and for the first time told me she likes me but shes not ready to commit. She said we are in a "relationship" but to me i dont know what that means. She just wants time to move on. I know she likes me, she obviously cares bit she said these two things to me that i can't forget. She said that she dosent want to hurt me if she leaves in the future. Does that mean she doesent see a future towards us? Because she does not like short term relationship; only long. Should i give her time or end it and go cold turkey? Edited September 8, 2013 by thewrongonee
ThisGal Posted September 8, 2013 Posted September 8, 2013 (edited) She said that she dosent want to hurt me if she leaves in the future. Does that mean she doesent see a future towards us? Because she does not like short term relationship; only long. Should i give her time or end it and go cold turkey? Well she's said it a few times, she 'needs time.' I don't know how much clearer she can get. If you are unable to give her the time she needs then you can end communication. The best way to get over someone is to stop all communication because the longer you prolong it the more your feelings will grow. So if you truly cannot accept not knowing where you two stand and need the assurance that this may lead to something long term then end it. But if you are willing to be patient and take it one day at a time then go for it. She has made it clear she is interested in you (says she doesn't want to lose you and came back after you both attempted to end the friendship). She got out of a long term relationship so she needs time to heal. However, be careful not turn into her rebound guy, one she uses as a distraction from her ex. Do as you feel is right for yourself. Edited September 8, 2013 by ThisGal 1
Author thewrongonee Posted September 8, 2013 Author Posted September 8, 2013 Well she's said it a few times, she 'needs time.' I don't know how much clearer she can get. If you are unable to give her the time she needs then you can end communication. The best way to get over someone is to stop all communication because the longer you prolong it the more your feelings will grow. So if you truly cannot accept not knowing where you two stand and need the assurance that this may lead to something long term then end it. But if you are willing to be patient and take it one day at a time then go for it. She has made it clear she is interested in you (says she doesn't want to lose you and came back after you both attempted to end the friendship). She got out of a long term relationship so she needs time to heal. However, be careful not turn into her rebound guy, one she uses as a distraction from her ex. Do as you feel is right for yourself. I want to give her all the time in the world, believe me. But it scared me that she might not see me in her future. Also, as for the rebound im not sure what any one would do in my spot, i did not expect her to break up with her bf or even l knew.
ThisGal Posted September 8, 2013 Posted September 8, 2013 I want to give her all the time in the world, believe me. But it scared me that she might not see me in her future. Also, as for the rebound im not sure what any one would do in my spot, i did not expect her to break up with her bf or even l knew. Well that's the reality that you have to face. Like I said, it's either you can accept her moving at a slow pace or leave. Whatever will make you content.
Author thewrongonee Posted September 9, 2013 Author Posted September 9, 2013 I just hate feeling like this, makes me feel worse and worse
Author thewrongonee Posted September 9, 2013 Author Posted September 9, 2013 I know i should wait, but what if she finds someone else because we havent commited? i feel like this is some type of relationship that could end any time. I did not talk to her yesterday, because i was so confused. I feel bad, ill call her tonight but i just want to see some sort of change in her to make me believe she'll put some sort of commitment.
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