collegeguy2004 Posted November 18, 2004 Posted November 18, 2004 Hi everyone, Okay, I need some objective second (and more) opinions on this situation. I'm a college senior and I've met an amazing girl, who happens to be a freshman, in one of my classes. (It's an elective class.) We started by talking to each other in class, then we studied a few times with other people and even studied alone once. We had to write an essay about a movie for our class, so I invited her over and we watched it together. She was always very sweet and seemed to enjoy herself, so I got the definite impression that she was interested in me. On night after class I walked out with her and asked her out. (It was one of those day-time activities that aren't necessarily dates, even though I think we both knew that it was.) She said yes and we ended up spending almost three hours together that weekend and she seemed to have a great time. Now, here's where it gets tricky. I asked her out again on a similar, non-threatening day-time "date" the next week after class. She immediately began to look nervous and just gently said no thanks and goodbye. I took this as a turn down. I figured maybe she really didn't have a good time during our last "date" and decided that was enough. I was expecting class to be a little awkward the next week, but it wasn't. She sat next to me in class and talked with me. The next day I had a question and called her, but she wasn't in. She ended up calling me back and we talked about it for quite a while. And after our last class, she went out of her way to come up to me afterwards and say goodnight. What's going on?! Did she change her mind? Or is she just trying, maybe a little too hard, to smooth over the bumps so we can stay study-buddies? (She's very smart and has never really needed my help, but I've needed her's.) Any advice, thoughts, etc would be greatly appreciated. Thanks!
Scarlett_girl Posted November 18, 2004 Posted November 18, 2004 that is weird. Maybe she is trying to keep the friendship or maybe she just thought you were coming on too strong before, whateverr the case I think you should back of abit..you asked her out (twice)..if she's into you..you'll know..she'll make sure you know, girls are obvious in that way! good luck!
red4kat Posted November 18, 2004 Posted November 18, 2004 Well it's hard to say in your situation because we can only judge by what you say. I haven't seen you or her interract. But if you're really interested in that girl I would try giving it one more shot. From what it sounds like, it may be the activity itself that turned her off, not you. She said "no thanks", that sounds more like she wasn't interested in going out and doing that particular thing, rather than stop hanging out with you. I mean what kind of activity did you invite her to? You never know, I mean if you invited her to go say skating, she may not know how to skate or have a bad history of braking her leg skating one time so she doesn't want to do it again. I would suggest asking her out on a date, a real evening date, say a dinner. It is a bit risky, because if she's not interested, she'll probably say no and if she is, she'll be more than happy to go out with you. You could say: Would you like to go out for a dinner with me sometime? and if she says sure, then how about Thursday or something like that. This way you will know for sure what her thoughts are regarding you. K
alphamale Posted November 18, 2004 Posted November 18, 2004 Dear CG2004: Could you plz explain why you are trying to be the "nice" and "non-threatening" dude? Why do you think behaving like this wouold get you anywhere with her? This puts you into "friends" category right away. And once you are in this category it is VERY hard to claw your way out.
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