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Uh oh, what am I getting into...


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Posted

I'm really confused with what to do in this situation... My ex (calling her A) and I broke up almost a month ago now. She broke up with me saying she needed space and blah blah blah. For a bit more information my ex is going through depression and is literally pushing anyone close to her away, friends, family, and myself included. Anyhow I took those weeks to heal myself and have recently started to reconnect with friends and going out more often.

 

Last night I stopped on my lunch break where an ex's friend works (calling her M). M was super excited to see me and asked if I wanted to grab a drink with her tonight. Well I got done with work early last night and texted M that if she wanted to get together when she was off of work we could. She said yes and we agreed to meet up at a local bar. When we saw each other she ran up and gave me a hug, asked how I was doing, and then started to ask about things that had transpired with A. I told her I didn't want to just sit there and rehash my feelings about A and that I was moving on with my life.

 

M then began to talk about how good I was to A, that A was never appreciative enough of me. And that M had always had an interest in me even when things started with A. I met them both at the same time when we all worked together and the three of us would hang out after work.

 

Long story short, I think M has feelings for me and may want to start dating me. I'm not for sure yet but that seems to be the direction this is all heading. Tonight I am hanging out with M again and I'm not really sure what direction to take this.

 

I feel like if I dated M that A would be beyond livid and would get in the middle of the friendship that the two of them have had well before me. Though M is telling me that her and A aren't close anymore and she's tired of trying to make a friendship work when A is completely unappreciative of their friendship.

 

My gut says that I need to establish a boundary and that M and I just need to remain friends and keep it at that. Maybe after some time, like many months from now after A and I have both healed that perhaps something could happen but right now I feel like it would be a breach of trust. So am I thinking the right away or should I go with the "All is fair in love and war" approach?

Posted

Sounds messy. With all the girls in the world why date your ex's friend?

Posted

Ah man M sounds so cool and awesome, fun, outgoing and even listened to you wimper over your ex when she just wanted to grab a drink with you and have some fun. What a woman.

 

Forget about A especially as she made out she needed space from you because she was unhappy which is bulls**t because if she actually liked you then you would make her happy, such a lame excuse. Screw A and her feelings.

 

Get it on with M and do not for a second let A come back into your life ( which she most likely will try to do once she finds out about M )

 

If you do not get it on with M hook me up please, I need me an M.

Posted

M seems like a real friend... less than a month after her friend (whether close or once was close) has broken up with her ex, she's ready to pounce. She probably doesn't care whether you're on the rebound.

 

I think you can find someone that will create less drama in your life.

  • Like 1
Posted

Keep moving on with your life. M is toxic. She's not a good person. Drama.

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