HappyLove Posted September 7, 2013 Posted September 7, 2013 Full disclosure: I have no game whatsoever when it comes to flirting. I don't know how to do it, don't know where to begin. I'm also terrified of approaching men I'm interested in, I'm talking knees knocking hands shaking. There's this gorgeous guy at my local coffee house. He is ALWAYS by himself for at least 2 years he just goes get his coffee, wears his headphones, and scans his iPad. This guy is model type cute, nice height, nice body, muscles but not too much muscles. Dark hair and features, very good looking! Quiet, never seen him talking to anyone really. Actually for the first time ever I did see him talking to a girl maybe 2 months ago looks like they were on a lunch date, but haven't seen him with her since. My heart skips a beat every time I see him, which is pretty often because he goes every single day in the evening for coffee and I go a lot as well. I would love to get to know him but he has never showed ANY interest in me. I feel like I could really embarrass myself if I get dissed then I'd have to see him everyday. Is it worth taking that chance? What should I do...how should I do it? Or save myself the embarrassment, he would have let me know? What do you think?
soccerrprp Posted September 7, 2013 Posted September 7, 2013 Full disclosure: I have no game whatsoever when it comes to flirting. I don't know how to do it, don't know where to begin. I'm also terrified of approaching men I'm interested in, I'm talking knees knocking hands shaking. There's this gorgeous guy at my local coffee house. He is ALWAYS by himself for at least 2 years he just goes get his coffee, wears his headphones, and scans his iPad. This guy is model type cute, nice height, nice body, muscles but not too much muscles. Dark hair and features, very good looking! Quiet, never seen him talking to anyone really. Actually for the first time ever I did see him talking to a girl maybe 2 months ago looks like they were on a lunch date, but haven't seen him with her since. My heart skips a beat every time I see him, which is pretty often because he goes every single day in the evening for coffee and I go a lot as well. I would love to get to know him but he has never showed ANY interest in me. I feel like I could really embarrass myself if I get dissed then I'd have to see him everyday. Is it worth taking that chance? What should I do...how should I do it? Or save myself the embarrassment, he would have let me know? What do you think? Relax, breath, and ask yourself, "Am I in the same league as this guy is?" I hate to put it that way, but if he's model-cute, then he's likely looking for other women who are about that too, right? Are you confident in your physical offerings? After that, you having nothing to lose except, perhaps, a favorite coffee shop to frequent if things don't work out and you're too embarrassed to return. I say go for it!
henderson14 Posted September 7, 2013 Posted September 7, 2013 (edited) Well the good news is that you are a girl, so you don't have to do the hard work. All you have to do is show him you are interested and he will do the rest if he is interested. Just make some random comment. You could go with something like "you must like this place." He will say why. You say "I see you here all the time." Or ask him how he likes his Ipad because you were thinking of getting one (even if you have one already ). Thats all it takes. Picking up guys 101. But ya, unless your above average in looks, I would pass. If he doesn't compare to any of your previous BF's, he might be out of your league. Some girls look better than they think though. Edited September 7, 2013 by henderson14
Author HappyLove Posted September 7, 2013 Author Posted September 7, 2013 Relax, breath, and ask yourself, "Am I in the same league as this guy is?" I hate to put it that way, but if he's model-cute, then he's likely looking for other women who are about that too, right? Are you confident in your physical offerings? After that, you having nothing to lose except, perhaps, a favorite coffee shop to frequent if things don't work out and you're too embarrassed to return. I say go for it! But the thing that gets me is this guy is ALWAYS alone. He doesn't have hotties hanging off his arm. Maybe he needs a friend . I don't know I'm pretty cute I get enough attention just not from guys I'm interested in. I don't necessarily think its a league thing. I'm thinking ok maybe he would have approached you if interested. And I'm scared out of my mind to approach anyone so...
henderson14 Posted September 7, 2013 Posted September 7, 2013 But the thing that gets me is this guy is ALWAYS alone. He doesn't have hotties hanging off his arm. Maybe he needs a friend . I don't know I'm pretty cute I get enough attention just not from guys I'm interested in. I don't necessarily think its a league thing. I'm thinking ok maybe he would have approached you if interested. And I'm scared out of my mind to approach anyone so... I think you should go for it and tell us what happens. What do you think about my line of asking him about his Ipad? There would be nothing embarrassing about that. Its not like you are asking him out or anything. Just casual chit chat. It just makes it harder that he has his headphones on. On a side note, I think this site should offer the option to put pictures of yourself on your profile. I'll tell you if your cute or not.
soccerrprp Posted September 7, 2013 Posted September 7, 2013 But the thing that gets me is this guy is ALWAYS alone. He doesn't have hotties hanging off his arm. Maybe he needs a friend . I don't know I'm pretty cute I get enough attention just not from guys I'm interested in. I don't necessarily think its a league thing. I'm thinking ok maybe he would have approached you if interested. And I'm scared out of my mind to approach anyone so... Nah, plenty of guys are shy about approaching other women in public, especially. Go ask him if you can buy him a coffee or tell him that you see him a lot and was wondering if he was dating. Be the pursuer....again, what do you have to lose except the chance to get to know someone you like. The vast majority of guys would be flattered by your interest and approach. And most would, if dating someone else, appropriately and lightly let you down with a smile.
Author HappyLove Posted September 7, 2013 Author Posted September 7, 2013 I think you should go for it and tell us what happens. What do you think about my line of asking him about his Ipad? There would be nothing embarrassing about that. Its not like you are asking him out or anything. Just casual chit chat. It just makes it harder that he has his headphones on. On a side note, I think this site should offer the option to put pictures of yourself on your profile. I'll tell you if your cute or not. Even the thought if doing that scares me to death. I know it's stupid but we all have our issues...that's mine. Lol, trying to imagine myself tapping his shoulder oh um hey nice iPad. It's a great idea but can I follow through without spilling his or my coffee all over him from being so nervous is the question.
Author HappyLove Posted September 7, 2013 Author Posted September 7, 2013 Nah, plenty of guys are shy about approaching other women in public, especially. Go ask him if you can buy him a coffee or tell him that you see him a lot and was wondering if he was dating. Be the pursuer....again, what do you have to lose except the chance to get to know someone you like. The vast majority of guys would be flattered by your interest and approach. And most would, if dating someone else, appropriately and lightly let you down with a smile. Very true, most men are very kind and flattered by being approached.
henderson14 Posted September 7, 2013 Posted September 7, 2013 (edited) Even the thought if doing that scares me to death. I know it's stupid but we all have our issues...that's mine. Lol, trying to imagine myself tapping his shoulder oh um hey nice iPad. It's a great idea but can I follow through without spilling his or my coffee all over him from being so nervous is the question. I wouldnt tap him on the shoulder. Look at him or sit at the table next to him and try to make eye contact. Then when you make eye contact tell him you were thinking of getting one and ask how he likes his. BTW. I think its adorable when a girl acts scared and awkward trying to talk to me. Those are usually the ones I like the most!. Your a girl. You can get away with more. I actually had a cute girl hit on me not too long ago. I was kind of in shock at first, but I liked her! Unfortunately she was only here for a few weeks. Want to guess what her line was? It was "are you from Illinois." LOL. You think I cared? No way! I was flattered that she tried! And no, don't ask him if he is dating. That is LAME! Sounds like advice my MOM would post. No one ever asks that. Usually people ask what someone did on their weekend if they want to know if someone is singe. If they are with someone they will say they did X activity with their boyfriend/girlfriend. But there is no need to ask that. If he is single and likes you he will carry on a conversation with you. If not, you will know. If he's not making eye contact or looking around ever, he probably isn't interested or looking. Trust my advice. I have a proven track record of pickup up random girls. Edited September 7, 2013 by henderson14
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