Drewx2 Posted September 6, 2013 Posted September 6, 2013 This girl rejected me due to 'trust issues' last spring but still wanted to be friends. Now I'm thinking that was BS because she had a bf a month later. (they just broke up) In reality, I believe it's because I failed to take action. She probably thought I was too nice, passive & slow. I graduated from school and moved away. She suggested that we exchange letters. I agreed and wrote, she wrote back. I feel weird writing letters to a "friend." It makes me feel soft and girly. I'm really not comfortable with it. I'd have no problem writing her letters if she was my girlfriend. But since she rejected me I kind of feel like her doormat/puppy dog. I know she might not see me in this light, but it's how I feel. Are these thoughts legitimate? Or am I over analyzing things? I think I'm going to stop. If she doesn't call me out I'll figure she didn't really care in the first place. Is this a good way to look at it?
thishatteredsymphony Posted September 6, 2013 Posted September 6, 2013 If you're feeling like a doormat to her in writing letters, then yes, by all means stop writing letters. This is the best thing you can do for yourself. 1
Misfortune Posted September 6, 2013 Posted September 6, 2013 This girl rejected me due to 'trust issues' last spring but still wanted to be friends. Now I'm thinking that was BS because she had a bf a month later. (they just broke up) In reality, I believe it's because I failed to take action. She probably thought I was too nice, passive & slow. I graduated from school and moved away. She suggested that we exchange letters. I agreed and wrote, she wrote back. I feel weird writing letters to a "friend." It makes me feel soft and girly. I'm really not comfortable with it. I'd have no problem writing her letters if she was my girlfriend. But since she rejected me I kind of feel like her doormat/puppy dog. I know she might not see me in this light, but it's how I feel. Are these thoughts legitimate? Or am I over analyzing things? I think I'm going to stop. If she doesn't call me out I'll figure she didn't really care in the first place. Is this a good way to look at it? Don't do anything that you don't want to do. If it makes you uncomfortable, stop. Your thoughts are legitimate. Maybe thinks of you as a door mat or maybe she doesn't, none of that matters. What matters, is how you feel about it. 1
hopefulfaerie Posted September 6, 2013 Posted September 6, 2013 I can see why it would make you feel that way. I don't think you're over analyzing. It does seem a little "off" she may be using you as a security blanket. I hope not but it's possible. But yea, seems a little strange. LOL ! And I'm a MAJOR GIRLY GIRL! 1
darkmoon Posted September 6, 2013 Posted September 6, 2013 she might not know that letters are a pain, you could ask both of you to phone no more letters anymore, I'd send facebook messages, or email, or find a girl who doesn't need letters, wants more life, imho, letters are a srs drag 1
formshifter Posted September 7, 2013 Posted September 7, 2013 It’s simple. You should tell her again that you want to be more than just friends. If she says “NO!” then you have to move on because you are wasting your time. Girls are very clever and they use this trick with “just friends” because they gain lots of advantages from it. And what do we get? Most of the time we gain nothing, we are losing our time . Oh, I forgot, one of the reasons to keep a girl as just a friend is because you can meet her friends or maybe you really like her as a friend but you have to gain something. Do you get my point? Do you like to waste your time writing letters? There are other girls available out there!
Misfortune Posted September 7, 2013 Posted September 7, 2013 It’s simple. You should tell her again that you want to be more than just friends. If she says “NO!” then you have to move on because you are wasting your time. Girls are very clever and they use this trick with “just friends” because they gain lots of advantages from it. And what do we get? Most of the time we gain nothing, we are losing our time . Oh, I forgot, one of the reasons to keep a girl as just a friend is because you can meet her friends or maybe you really like her as a friend but you have to gain something. Do you get my point? Do you like to waste your time writing letters? There are other girls available out there! 1st, you're born with p***y and then you get the everything.
KCCK Posted September 7, 2013 Posted September 7, 2013 it is not wise to continue doing something that hurts you.. writing letters are nonsense, after a while, when either gets busy from work or having new relationship than the writing begins to slow down, delay and eventually stop and forgotten.. dont waste your time doing that.. if you really want to know the truth, than go for a phone call and set things straight once and for all..
Mr Scorpio Posted September 7, 2013 Posted September 7, 2013 Maybe she lied to you about the commitment issue and rejected you maliciously. OTOH, maybe she was interested, you were apprehensive, and she fed you a line to avoid hurting your feelings? If writing her is causing you pain, then yes you should stop. However, I don't think I'd feel like a doormat from writing someone letters. I'd be happy that someone wanted to communicate with me.
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