found out my ex dating the girl he left me for..

[hopefulfaerie]

It's been 4 months for me and I intend to avoid places we frequented for a VERY long time, it's utterly detrimental to me. I recall the first time she dumped me I went about the entire thing the wrong way. I used to go to parks we used to hang out at and just sit on a bench and wallow for hours. We also had this "special bench" that has an amazing view of NYC, this place is gorgeous, I used to go there as well and torture myself, but not anymore. I choose to stay away from those horrific places as it will only bring me nothing but grief.

Absolutely!

Also some things can NEVER be "unseen"

[crazy1234]

Is there any way you can avoid places where you may run into him? Even just for a while? I had to do that years ago. The bar with the same friends, parties, even the grocery store. I couldn't even drive by his street. I made it a point to avoid places I may see him with her. After a while I didn't even think about it and never ran into them anyway. Wait, there was one time I just HAPPENED to pull up behind them while they were driving. That truly sucked.

 

Some people here may argue that you shouldn't avoid places but to me it was a relief to not face those horrible triggers daily. I found a new place to hang out. A few new friends (All our friends were mutual so they were her friends now) OUCH!!!!

It was lonely and scary at first but it was worth it because the new hang outs and new friends didn't remind me of him.

 

Some people thought I was not facing it by finding new friends and places to hang out but I didn't really care what they thought. I knew I would feel so much worse if I saw them together and didn't see the need to torture myself and constantly "tear the scab off" I needed time to heal and of course I did.

 

They ended up getting married and having a baby (I still heard things from friends, that was unavoidable) Anyway, I thought can this get any worse? The pain was awful.

I'm NOT saying that will happen in your case but my point is I thought I was literally going to die of a broken heart. I didn't of course. ha ha!

I keep reminding myself that I have been through serious heartbreak that I never thought I would recover from before and I did. I will get through this one too!

And so will you!!! ((hugs))

It really hurts to everyday.Its a new morning now and i happen to have a bad dream about him and it just sucks now with all the why and how questions.I'm trying to sleep but i cant.It really hurts when i think how he put his status in a relatonship within just a month of breaking up.I never got that:(.Its been 6 months they'r dating and it just sucks to even think how long they'll last.I know I shouldnt care even if they end up marrying each other.All their pictures,i saw them 4-5 months ago and i remember each and every picture like it was yesterday.Ofcourse i avoid places where he could go and timings when i could bump into him and yes it is a relief not to see this *******'s face.

[crazy1234]

It's been 4 months for me and I intend to avoid places we frequented for a VERY long time, it's utterly detrimental to me. I recall the first time she dumped me I went about the entire thing the wrong way. I used to go to parks we used to hang out at and just sit on a bench and wallow for hours. We also had this "special bench" that has an amazing view of NYC, this place is gorgeous, I used to go there as well and torture myself, but not anymore. I choose to stay away from those horrific places as it will only bring me nothing but grief.

I'm sorry to hear that jdpt but atleast you realized sooner than later than you must pull away from it and you did.

[crazy1234]

Hold yourself at high regards and realize that his actions towards you are utterly disrespectful. You will be ok I promise, take it a day at a time.

I hope I can.He makes me sick to my stomach.I cant bear the idea of him ever being this heartless and cruel.But anyways it was not just meant to be from the very beginning.It was my mistake that I kept trying.I should'v stopped years ago,but anyhow its just sad and cruel how things can be in life sometimes.

[JDPT]

I hope I can.He makes me sick to my stomach.I cant bear the idea of him ever being this heartless and cruel.But anyways it was not just meant to be from the very beginning.It was my mistake that I kept trying.I should'v stopped years ago,but anyhow its just sad and cruel how things can be in life sometimes.

 

Life is like a rollercoaster, filled with many ups and downs it's never steady. Unfortunate events and issues are thrown at you unexpectedly to deal with. Breakups, death, financial issues and everything else that comes at you with no notice. We need to readily accommodate and be ready to take on challenges head on, this is life. We can always strive towards making life as pleasant as we will like to be and this is our everyday journey. This breakup is another lesson to be learned from life. We will eventually find someone who will come close to what we need to in life and face challenges with this new person who can be of assistance to is per say. Be strong as you will make it through this. We are all stronger than we think we are, when faced with challenges survival instincts will kick in and we will truly see how strong we are.

[crazy1234]

Life is like a rollercoaster, filled with many ups and downs it's never steady. Unfortunate events and issues are thrown at you unexpectedly to deal with. Breakups, death, financial issues and everything else that comes at you with no notice. We need to readily accommodate and be ready to take on challenges head on, this is life. We can always strive towards making life as pleasant as we will like to be and this is our everyday journey. This breakup is another lesson to be learned from life. We will eventually find someone who will come close to what we need to in life and face challenges with this new person who can be of assistance to is per say. Be strong as you will make it through this. We are all stronger than we think we are, when faced with challenges survival instincts will kick in and we will truly see how strong we are.

There is no other way than being strong.Its just a bad day today and I cant understand how all these happened.Ofcourse we have to move forward and make each day better for ourselves.Thankyou so much for your words as they are really worth realizing and true facts of life.This breakup has been a lesson learnt after too much heartache.I'm glad I never got back when he was saying sorry and what not.He is in a relationship with this girl already.Its just so shocking.Its been 6 months already and I just don't want to think about this guy anymore.I keep sinking into the last days he was ignoring me and how miserable and undefined i felt.Pray for me that I get over it.I'v wasted years for this guy and it was never worth it.I walked away in silence.Thank you again JDPT for your kind words.

[JDPT]

There is no other way than being strong.Its just a bad day today and I cant understand how all these happened.Ofcourse we have to move forward and make each day better for ourselves.Thankyou so much for your words as they are really worth realizing and true facts of life.This breakup has been a lesson learnt after too much heartache.I'm glad I never got back when he was saying sorry and what not.He is in a relationship with this girl already.Its just so shocking.Its been 6 months already and I just don't want to think about this guy anymore.I keep sinking into the last days he was ignoring me and how miserable and undefined i felt.Pray for me that I get over it.I'v wasted years for this guy and it was never worth it.I walked away in silence.Thank you again JDPT for your kind words.

 

Joy wouldn't feel so good if it wasn't for pain. We are all in the same boat here striving for better days. With the clear understanding that one day we will find someone who will reciprocate 100% as we always give ourselves 110% and we should not expect anything less than that. We are all here for each other and will end up being new and improved us.