Dorota Posted September 6, 2013 Posted September 6, 2013 So my ex-boyfriend broke up with me about 7 weeks ago. Recently we started talking through email, but I felt like maybe I'm not quite ready to be his friend. He said the emails were helping relieve the tension for him, but I explained to him that even emailing was stressing me out. I told him after the way he treated me I didn't trust him and that it would take time for me to heal and for him to regain my trust. He said that there's nothing he could do to regain my trust and that I was the one that needed to find peace. I agree that I need to find peace, and I think I have. I've forgiven him, but it doesn't mean I have to forget right? Now I feel guilty for making him earn my trust. Do I have the right not to trust him? Do I have the right to ask him to earn my trust back? I just feel like what I'm feeling isn't valid.
melell Posted September 6, 2013 Posted September 6, 2013 Everything you has said is perfectly understandable. Just because you forgive someone it doesn't mean you will automatically trust them, and it doesn't mean you won't still feel uneasy about it. I have felt guilty so many times because it was as though I was punishing my ex while he was trying to be nice. The reality is things hurt us and it does take time to get over those hurts! You have every right to ask, and if he respects you he will understand. It is not your fault at all, you can't help how you feel. And you should never feel guilt because of how you feel with things like this!
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