Monodare1 Posted September 5, 2013 Posted September 5, 2013 Hi Troops Thats me almost 3 months in from innitially separating, just wondering what opinions there are about how long the transitional phase lasts and if there are kids are involved and no contact is not possible does that lengthen the transitional phase regards the ex partner? How do you know you are ready to move on?
Author Monodare1 Posted September 5, 2013 Author Posted September 5, 2013 Incidentally, its the exes birthday, should I just ignore it? I've arranged a birthday card on behalf of my son, which will arrive a day late, as I was snowed under at work, but should I say anything when I give my son his daily call or just let it pass?
73Fras Posted September 5, 2013 Posted September 5, 2013 I think it all depends on the specifics of your situation Why the separation - how long together, etc My ex and I will be married 22 yrs this Saturday and have been separated over 13mths now and for the most part have been very cordial. Well in fact, today is my ex's birthday and we had lunch together and I gave him a card but no present. Getting a card on behalf of your child I think is perfect and definitely taking the high road. 1
littlejaz Posted September 5, 2013 Posted September 5, 2013 Unfortunately, there is no one answer to your question. It is different for everyone. Time doesn't heal all wounds - it is what you do with the time that will heal your wounds. You will know when you are ready to move on - one day you will find yourself smiling or humming and know that you are feeling better. I firmly believe that posting on this site and reading other posts here will help. There are some truly inspiring stories on here that let you know there is life after divorce and you can be happy again. Be good to yourself. 2
Author Monodare1 Posted September 5, 2013 Author Posted September 5, 2013 Cheers guys, was a a pretty low ebb today, I know that the blues in a separation ebb and flow like the tide, but today was definitely a high tide moment. My little one had a new haircut and he was boasting how his step grandfather took him to get it done. As I live a fair distance from where he lives, and don't drive, I only get him one day over the weekend and feel like I'm missing out on the little things like that. Pretty hard just now but hopefully thing will lighten a bit, seems a long way off though. 1
Author Monodare1 Posted September 5, 2013 Author Posted September 5, 2013 Also feeling pretty lonely and bogged down with paperwork due to my moving back in with my father. While feel the ex is getting away with everything.
MrE_UK Posted September 5, 2013 Posted September 5, 2013 Also feeling pretty lonely and bogged down with paperwork due to my moving back in with my father. While feel the ex is getting away with everything. Sounds familiar! Look up the 180 here: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/separation-divorce/406628-critical-readings-separation-divorce Believe me, it helps...
Misadventure Posted September 5, 2013 Posted September 5, 2013 Mono, do something for you...I don't care what it is..something that makes you feel good. Read a book, fly a kite, get a bloody drink, whatever's your fancy, it makes you feel better if just for that time.
Author Monodare1 Posted September 6, 2013 Author Posted September 6, 2013 Well, bought a couple of sweaters (getting cold here already in bonnie Scotland), bought some DVDs to take my mind off the situ. I'm a member of an old fashioned gym that I go to during my lunch hour at work and toying with joining a local gym for some night time work outs so trying. Live with my dad so not totally lonely, still miss the company of a woman though, but will just need to get on with it I guess.
Recommended Posts