Spiritofmetal Posted September 3, 2013 Posted September 3, 2013 Who should initiate contact in this situation? The dumpee or the dumper? (I was the dumper the first time but he contacted me because he was at fault, but this time (2nd time) he dumped me) The first time I broke up with him because I found out that he has been lying to me that he loves me when he didn't even like me anymore.. He didn't seem hurt AT ALL when I broke things up... But 2 weeks after NC he came back The 2nd time we got back together after he came back So 11 days after we got back together the second time we were talking and what happened was that he was unintentionally making me jealous but it got to a point where I brought my ex up who he asked me never to bring up. But my ex was the only guy that made him jealous. ( no matter who else I talked about he didn't care) then he got so mad he stopped talking to me and a week later he broke up with me. When he said we are over, i was at shock and i yelled at him and told him i cant take your lies and bullsh*t anymore, it doesn't hurt that you broke up with me it hurts that you never loved me. even though i was hurting like hell... after the first break up i had researched so much i learned that when he wants to let go you should let him without begging.. so i didn't beg and He walked away silently, and ignored all my messages. It's been about 10 days into NC and he hasn't contacted me or responded to my messages... It was my birthday yesterday he posted "Happy birthday :-)" on my fb wall that's it... Since I did something he personally asked me not to do and caused him to lose feelings... I was thinking who should contact? I am afraid I might make things worse if I make the first move... I want to make it right again.. I want us to be together.... i just don't want things to be worse..
Eddie007 Posted September 4, 2013 Posted September 4, 2013 My philosophy is the "dumper" should always reach out first. They are the ones who ended it, so it falls on them to try and reconcile if they desire. My ex dumped me 18 days ago and its been 18 days of no contact from either of us. I have no real desire to contact her. I miss her but I refuse to reach out.
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