Armyguy123 Posted September 3, 2013 Posted September 3, 2013 Here is my topic for reference. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/breaks-breaking-up/420941-got-dumped-out-blue-do-i-stand-chance-get-her-back So my Ex who I have been struggling to stop thinking about for the last 2 weeks finally contacted me out of the blue. I had been making some progress and gotten used to not hearing from her. Her and I just graduated college this past spring. I am a soldier and she is going to be a High School Teacher. She starts her first day of teaching tomorrow and texted me I'm so nervous about tomorrow I know I shouldn't do this but can you help me calm down. She called me yesterday and we talked for a hour she cried and said she misses me. I am so confused because she is the one who dumped me. I still care deeply about this girl but I do not want to be her emotional go to for her support and not get anything from her in return. I replied with "i hope your first day of work goes well but i dont think i can talk to you right now. i need some time to think about everything" I do not want to go back to square one where I cant function because I think about her all day everyday. Is she hinting that she has any doubt with her decision by crying over the phone and says she misses me, yet says she made the right choice. Afraid to hang up on phone call which lasted over a hour. Said she thinks about me at night and gets lonely. Texts me asking for support night before first day of work. What does this mean? Girls out there what are your opinions? Is she talking to me since she doesn't have that many close friends?, and pretty much lost the support of all my friends military, fraternity and otherwise. I want a girl who is going to stand by me even if I have to go away for a while in the military, man the military is sure great at destroying relationships.
Grumpybutfun Posted September 3, 2013 Posted September 3, 2013 Not a lady, but am a former military Submariner. She may be sorry about the way things ended and is trying to process it through you so she can feel some closure. However, this isn't reconciliation and she isn't in it for the long haul. Sometimes it is hard to end things when you know that it is for the best, but you still have feelings for someone. Feelings in themselves doesn't make a marriage or a relationship. It is loyalty and fealty that do that. I have an amazing supportive spouse who retired with me after 25 years in. She cried when I left and rejoiced when I came home, and she always was there when I needed her to be. I asked a lot, and she gave more than I thought possible. I never had a moment where I didn't trust her and she felt the same way. Why? We both made a decision to be each other's rock. Marriage and relationships are all about decisions...the big ones and the small ones and the ones you never make. The significant others and spouses who are in it for the long haul stands by you even when you are gone and cannot make a phone call or send a letter. They take care of your family and home because they know that you are taking care of the country. Find someone who is equal to the task of standing by you through all of life's challenges. No marriage is free from separations and conflicts, but the military has special challenges that you have to have a strong lover for. The military isn't easy so you need someone who is special...strong, independent and loyal. Good luck, and I hope you both get some closure on the breakup, Grumps 1
BC1980 Posted September 3, 2013 Posted September 3, 2013 She is probably having a hard time with the breakup, and it hurts her ego that you haven't called her. She was curious about you. People usually take months to really regret or rethink a decision. She probably just got emotional and caved in and called you. Don't see her at this point. You did right by saying you needed time and space.
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