Is he doing more than just a friend or nice guy?

[Ditapage]

I can't work out if this guy I've known for 4 months is interested or just nice.

 

A mutual friend of ours had been pointing me out to him and according to the friend, he always had the mmmm yeah look on his face, ha, that's how he described it. But the friend didn't give too much away, either.

 

Then we started hanging out and immediately hit it off. But according to the friend, he keeps everything close to his chest and his last relationship was awful so he's more cautious.

 

I feel like he likes me. There is the constant intense eye contact (but then at other times he was look away really fast when I catch him looking) and smiling and he holds the door open for me, touches my back, compliments me (on how I look but also on things like my handwriting and my humility-- which is a quality he told our mutual friend that he looks for) teases & flirts, defends me when other people make a comment about me (even if they were kidding), gets sulky when I talk to other guys & cheers up as soon as I'm talking to him again, initiates the conversation, waits around to talk to me/be around me, said my ex is an idiot though he's never met him. He also wants to talk about what troubles me but I have a hard time opening up to him at the moment with no guarantee he cares or is just asking to be friendly.

 

Yesterday I was very down & because it was partly due to not knowing if he's just being a friend or wants more, I gave him the cold shoulder, was short with him, and other than put his hand on my back and say "oh ok" when someone told him I was tired, he didn't seem to care. I went home telling myself to move on...an interested guy would have been more caring/concerned.

 

Then he sent me a message that night saying hey hope you're feeling better, then called to say he hates texting and said he hoped he didn't upset me that day and he had noticed I was down. I was the one to end the conversation saying I wanted to go to bed.

 

I still don't know if he's just being nice, a friend or wants something more. I've never had this happen. Guys who like me are so obvious & I haven't dealt with more cautious or respectable types. If he does like me he might think he's showing it but I really don't know. I worry that I'm overanalysing it because I like him.

 

Is he doing more than a friend or "nice guy?"

Edited September 3, 2013 by Ditapage

[HEY2147]

I would say he's has a crush on you I mean hes happy when you are there cares about what you say and feel and thinks about you when you not there, think about it he seems interested doesnt he? If you like him why dont you go for it and ask him out? I mean Im a nice guy (not doormat) but I dont act like that unless Im crushing on the girl pretty hard.

[todreaminblue]

i am not really good at discerning interest.....sounds friendly like, but also fairly interested..smilin.......the phone call thing.....interest....the hand on the back well...strong interest in my opinion only guys with extreme guts put their hand on my back..the sulky thing ...interest...happiness when you talk to him ...friendship.....waiting to talk to you friendship...the oh ok....friendship...conversation friendship..telling you he sitn into texting prefers calling....interest...he is letting you know for a reason...text messages keep it friendly in my opinion phone calls far more personal.......so yes friendly but fairly interested in maybe something more...possibly fairly sure, probably might be sure of that fact...ack:)

 

 

i really dont know i do know i wish you heaps of luck..did i help...smilin atcha...best wishes....deb

[Lansing]

OK.. I was in a similar situation with a girl. We met after she broke up with her BF of a few years so we just became friends. I was dating other girls at the time but I liked her. We would spend time together, cook each other dinner, go out to events together, etc. I enjoyed her company but she then started changing and becoming a bit bitchy. She would do things like you are doing to your "friend" now. It started bugging because because I felt like I was seeing a different part of her personality that I was NOT attracted to. Eventually she told me that she was interested in me but the way she did it basically was attacking me for not having made a move on her (she basically questioned if I was gay or uncomfortable around woman!!)... She really started acting weird and all of these things together made me not interested in dating her even though I had been before but figured she was just interested in being friends earlier.

 

So, bottom line is don't start playing stupid games with him. It sounds like he does care for you. Show him that you care for him back and maybe have a discussion with him if he could ever see a future between you two/etc.

 

This girl went on to date some dude and trying to make me jealous with him. I tried to maintain a friendship with her but she has become less and less like the person I thought I knew. I haven't talked to her in months and I am pretty much done making any effort with her now.