newmoon Posted September 3, 2013 Posted September 3, 2013 I tried to patch things up with my bf of 2 years and although he was reluctant at first he (appeared) afterwards to want to do the same. We were working towards becoming friends again for the past 7 weeks and although there was no sexual contact or kissing we were hanging out and talking. I was in the process of forgiving him for past hurts and I thought he was doing the same. Then I told a mutual friend we were trying to work things out and get back together and our mutual friend says to me “wow, you’re able to forgive his cheating too?” WTF?! My ex never told me that he was cheating on me during our relationship, but when I confronted him he readily admitted it. Had I not gone back to talk and be friends after the initial breakup, had I stayed NC, I would not be suffering from further hurt and now embarrassment. He, like many other dumpers, already had someone lined up and ready probably two months before he dumped me. He made me believe that the relationship was ending because of something I did, when in fact it was him all along. I spent time doing the begging thing and the ‘I’m sorry’ nonsense, and all along I was not even in the wrong! Just don’t go back. Don’t do it. Keep your pride intact and move on as fast as possible. You might be forgiving far more than you know if you stick around. 9
crazy1234 Posted September 4, 2013 Posted September 4, 2013 I tried to patch things up with my bf of 2 years and although he was reluctant at first he (appeared) afterwards to want to do the same. We were working towards becoming friends again for the past 7 weeks and although there was no sexual contact or kissing we were hanging out and talking. I was in the process of forgiving him for past hurts and I thought he was doing the same. Then I told a mutual friend we were trying to work things out and get back together and our mutual friend says to me “wow, you’re able to forgive his cheating too?” WTF?! My ex never told me that he was cheating on me during our relationship, but when I confronted him he readily admitted it. Had I not gone back to talk and be friends after the initial breakup, had I stayed NC, I would not be suffering from further hurt and now embarrassment. He, like many other dumpers, already had someone lined up and ready probably two months before he dumped me. He made me believe that the relationship was ending because of something I did, when in fact it was him all along. I spent time doing the begging thing and the ‘I’m sorry’ nonsense, and all along I was not even in the wrong! Just don’t go back. Don’t do it. Keep your pride intact and move on as fast as possible. You might be forgiving far more than you know if you stick around. i went back to my ex..and baam!he left me for someone else only months after dating again and now they'r in a relationship.Sucks rights?Hurts too..deeply.Ofcourse I will never ever talk to this ungrateful piece of **** and for all of you out there still thinking about about getting back,let me tell you you'r only waiting under a big sword soon to fall on you.Things happen for the best.Maybe not now but soon you'll see it too. 2
emi Posted September 4, 2013 Posted September 4, 2013 Some work out, some dont, its depend on people. 2
saltyfishhead666 Posted September 4, 2013 Posted September 4, 2013 Oh that sucks! I hope you kicked his ass for that one. I can't stand people who are guilty of playing around and try and turn it round on someone else. What an absolute coward
Jiminy Cricket Posted September 4, 2013 Posted September 4, 2013 same with me, my ex denied there was anybody else. but i later found out she was and is still lying. we shouldn't believe anything our exes say, because they're just white lies to keep us from getting hurt. 1
travelonic Posted September 6, 2013 Posted September 6, 2013 Some work out, some dont, its depend on people. This. To use one experience as a blanket "don't do this," as opposed to a more cautionary "be careful," is IMO a shaky road to take - it really does depend on the people involved among other factors. 2
Joyvke Posted September 6, 2013 Posted September 6, 2013 What an ******* for doing something like that. Why can't people be honest with us. Hope you are ok *hugs*
StrongLass Posted September 6, 2013 Posted September 6, 2013 I found out the hard way too, but the only reason I agreed to reconciliation in the first place is that I knew that no matter what happened I WOULD ULTIMATELY BE OK. So will you you just need to remind yourself of that. As you know it still hurts a bit, but at least you know you DEFINITELY won't be missing out on anything good. Pity his next target as well as him; she isn't lucky enough to know what you do and he's lost you forever. 1
jesse93 Posted September 6, 2013 Posted September 6, 2013 Wow, I'm sorry to hear this, isn't it crazy the stuff you figure out after the relationship is over? I personally have found out quite a few things from my ex that I had no idea about this whole time, it's sad the things people are willing to hide from someone they "loved" but at least you found out sooner than later and you were able to confront him before you started dating again.
hotpotato Posted September 7, 2013 Posted September 7, 2013 Some work out, some dont, its depend on people. True. Sometimes it does work out but those people aren't hanging around at ls. 1
travelonic Posted September 11, 2013 Posted September 11, 2013 True. Sometimes it does work out but those people aren't hanging around at ls. Which leads to some of the BS ideas regarding reconciliation you sometimes see on here - about how it "never happens," often asking about what you see on LS [or lack thereof] as if you could evaluate overall "does it happen" in a vacumn like that
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