elbe Posted December 1, 2013 Posted December 1, 2013 How does giving a flower make you vulnerable? I still pack a .45 ACP. I guess we define vulnerable differently. Sorry, I didn't mean to question the size of your penis.
Author irc333 Posted December 2, 2013 Author Posted December 2, 2013 Actually, since you've been together for 5 months, and Valentines was coming up, he probably ignored what you were saying about flowers because..well...women ...who have been known to say one thing and mean something else, probably took it as "I'd love for you to send me flowers at work for Valentines!" Yes, men will more than likely ignore your requests regardless (esp in this circumstance) and send you flowers anyways, becuase he probably doesn't believe you.LOL And doesn't want you dumping his arse for "forgetting flowers" for V-day. lol I'm not keen on flowers - something which I do say to men I'm dating too. On a second date - as it won't be as either my place nor his then a flower would be too much but also something I then have to carry around all evening (as someone else also mentioned). The last guy I was dating sent some flowers to my work after we had been dating for 5 months. We hadn't been getting on terribly well - I didn't have as much free time in the day as he did and couldn't give him the attention he wanted. Anyway..back to the flowers...I had already said that I wasn't keen on flowers and wouldn't want them sent to my workplace (Valentines was just around the corner so I made this clear - I also don't own a vase - this he also knew). So...he ignored all that I had said and sent the biggest bouquet..box actually of flowers to my workplace. They were pretty..however..I don't drive and it's a mile and a half walk to work. (he knows I walk to and from work) The box of flowers was almost 3 ft high and I am only 5ft plus they came in a big box with about 2ltrs of water in a bag inside the box. I couldn't get them home that day (Monday) and couldn't get to a shop to purchase a vase either as I can only get to a shop that sells that kind of thing at weekends. I had to arrange a lift in the end to get them home and then had to just leave them in the box on the floor at my place. We don't have a garden waste collection where I live as it's communal maintained gardens and the gardeners deal with the waste and take it away themselves. The nearest garden waste place is in the middle of nowhere and impossible to get to without a car so when the flowers died I had to arrange for someone to take them away for me - I did try to bin them in the usual weekly waste collection but they refused them. I told him all of this and that flowers are not a good option for me - and said again that I just don't really like cut flowers - yet he did the exact same thing again on Valentines and on my birthday a few weeks later as well....even though I asked him not to each time.
gaius Posted December 2, 2013 Posted December 2, 2013 Thats just an example, but gentleman ever have women give youdating advice that made it seem a little "off" about their advice? If she became friends with you when you were single she'll most likely try to keep you that way. What does she gain by you successfully dating another woman? Nothing. In fact she only loses out since you'll be less available. In all fairness though she probably doesn't realize she sabotaging you on a conscious level. Plus very few people can accurately verbalize exactly what their own needs and actual turn ons are because they don't know what they are. I've looked at some of my old posts about myself annd cringed at how wrong they were. 2
Mrlonelyone Posted December 2, 2013 Posted December 2, 2013 I'm not keen on flowers - something which I do say to men I'm dating too. On a second date - as it won't be as either my place nor his then a flower would be too much but also something I then have to carry around all evening (as someone else also mentioned). The last guy I was dating sent some flowers to my work after we had been dating for 5 months. We hadn't been getting on terribly well - I didn't have as much free time in the day as he did and couldn't give him the attention he wanted. Anyway..back to the flowers...I had already said that I wasn't keen on flowers and wouldn't want them sent to my workplace (Valentines was just around the corner so I made this clear - I also don't own a vase - this he also knew). So...he ignored all that I had said and sent the biggest bouquet..box actually of flowers to my workplace. They were pretty..however..I don't drive and it's a mile and a half walk to work. (he knows I walk to and from work) The box of flowers was almost 3 ft high and I am only 5ft plus they came in a big box with about 2ltrs of water in a bag inside the box. I couldn't get them home that day (Monday) and couldn't get to a shop to purchase a vase either as I can only get to a shop that sells that kind of thing at weekends. I had to arrange a lift in the end to get them home and then had to just leave them in the box on the floor at my place. We don't have a garden waste collection where I live as it's communal maintained gardens and the gardeners deal with the waste and take it away themselves. The nearest garden waste place is in the middle of nowhere and impossible to get to without a car so when the flowers died I had to arrange for someone to take them away for me - I did try to bin them in the usual weekly waste collection but they refused them. I told him all of this and that flowers are not a good option for me - and said again that I just don't really like cut flowers - yet he did the exact same thing again on Valentines and on my birthday a few weeks later as well....even though I asked him not to each time. Every man reading this is thinking yeah if he hadn't sent you flowers you'd be complaining about him not sending flowers. Or This is how she gets to talk about a guy sending her flowers without blatant bragging. Kinda like a very thin woman talking to an overweight woman about how much she'd like to gain weight someplace other than her boobs, and how annoying it is to be so skinny. 1
ThatMan Posted December 2, 2013 Posted December 2, 2013 I've never seen so many men feel insecure over flowers before in my life. What the heck. 1
Am4Real Posted December 2, 2013 Posted December 2, 2013 (edited) Let’s look at the purpose of the first date…generally, can we not assume there was an initial attraction of some type be it physical, intellectual, humorous or some other factor? There was a spark of sorts having each person gain an interest in the other. So the first date is all about validating the initial intuition (baring a long-standing friendship that turns romantic of course). So off we go on that first date. We converse; we hopefully discover some new things about the other person, perhaps share stories, share laughs and further our interest in each other. Given something along those lines occurs and a second date is imminent or planned, a flower on any date after that would be an extension of one’s interest. What’s to stop the woman from giving such a gesture to the man? However, unless the two people have already manifested the discovery phase earlier, bringing a flower to the first encounter seems a little much. It can be construed as “assuming” by the recipient; “creepy” even if it comes across as an over-gesture. I would strongly lean away from such a deed on the first date but given there is enough interest for a second date – you have the best feel on the situation and the recipient, if you think it would be appreciated then go for it, apparently the majority of woman on this thread are in agreement and who would EVER disagree with a woman….LOL??? Sounds like fun, let us know how it goes when you muster up the chance to experiment. Edited December 2, 2013 by Am4Real
Am4Real Posted December 2, 2013 Posted December 2, 2013 Oh H E L L no, we have a long list of insecurities!!! LOL I love your observation though.... I've never seen so many men feel insecure over flowers before in my life. What the heck.
Titania22 Posted December 2, 2013 Posted December 2, 2013 What’s to stop the woman from giving such a gesture to the man? Funny you should bring this up. With my last boyfriend, I once brought hima rose to his place of work. Afterwards he got so angry, that I had embarrassed him in front of his work colleagues and was never to come to his work again. (I had been to his work before that, I had just never brought flower(s). I get that's a bit different, but the point is I was being romantic. I did something that I would have appreciated myself.
xxoo Posted December 3, 2013 Posted December 3, 2013 Men who do what they want with a devil may care attitude are attractive. This includes decisions about flowers.
WhiteButton Posted December 3, 2013 Posted December 3, 2013 I am a guy and i would never ever EVER bring a flower to a girl on first date. Whats the point of giving her flowers? To impress her, to show her you are romantic and gentlman. You can do that millions of other ways, You can impress her by being charming, funny, good listener etc. - but bringing flower that early in the game,i think its coming to strong that early. Now having said that maybe a two months or so into dating and you got a good feel for the girl, then yeah i would then do it.
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