cici713 Posted September 1, 2013 Posted September 1, 2013 Is it possible to remain friends with someone you dated? In the past, I have stayed friends with some people I have dated. One guy is actually one of my closest friends now and has been for almost 10 years. As I'm a little older, some people just cut off all ties. But for me, I'm very cautious who I let in my life and when I let them in, I hate them to disappear all together. I'm not talking about situations where things ended badly or it was just a bad relationship. More where things ended cordially or there wasn't a romantic connection. 1
RedRobin Posted September 1, 2013 Posted September 1, 2013 Yes, I try to keep good people in my life, even if it didn't work out romantically... no matter who does the breaking up.
Author cici713 Posted September 1, 2013 Author Posted September 1, 2013 The last guy I dated, I felt we were building a strong friendship more than a romantic relationship. Things ended and I miss the talks we had because we had so much in common. I would still like to be friends with him but don't know how to go a out it bc I'm not quite sure how he feels.
sillyanswer Posted September 1, 2013 Posted September 1, 2013 Is it possible to remain friends with someone you dated? Yes. Sometimes. One way that can work is if both people want to do that and neither continue to harbour grudges relating to splitting up or desires to get back together romantically or intimately. Other ways may be possible, too. 1
theonlyjuan Posted September 1, 2013 Posted September 1, 2013 The dumper - Yes and defanitly a lot easier. They get the best of both, single and keep them in their life. The dumpee - not so much. Too hard to move on and not bring feelings into the friendship After a few years then I think it is defanitly possible for both. Time has healed your feelings and have moved on. Both usually change a bit and have new experiences, it can be like meeting for the first time again. You can actually talk to each other without having to make small talk. I personally believe that in the long run it's best for the dumper to go NC on them, if the dumpee can't go NC themself. It will allow the dumpee to move on with their life. I am technically friends with my ex but it's a pathetic friendship, just small talk really. It's more being civil than a friend. It's too early to be friends, but I'm open to it one day.
Leigh 87 Posted September 1, 2013 Posted September 1, 2013 I think I will be great friends with my ex. We already are. It is still too soon for us to hang out though. We keep in touch via phone occasionally. I can tell we are lifelong friends.
Leigh 87 Posted September 1, 2013 Posted September 1, 2013 I was the dumpee. I can see we were not ideal for each other and am at peace with that. I honestly hope he finds love again and I will feel joy tomorrow if I find out he has. He feels the same way, but it feels too weird to see each other with new partners. Like. We would not CRY or be upset if we heard that we had found the loves of our lives. It is just not... indifferent to us, to find out that the person we lived, hugged tightly every night and had sex with for almost 3 years, is now more in love with another person they are doing the same thing with (the same things that were once SO personal and special to us). Sometimes you can be friends and not care if the other person is happy elsewhere, while at the same time not being ready to be around them. He is the dumper but we at the same stage. In fact, I think he cares MORE about me finding the love of my life than I do with him.. I told him I have been with other guys and he hates it a lot more than I react to him being with others. It is a male thing in some cases. An ego thing. Some guys get super attached and possessive and it is hard for them to shake.
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