skibunny Posted August 31, 2013 Posted August 31, 2013 I've been with my boyfriend for about 6 months, and in the last couple weeks he's started making frequent jokes about me getting pregnant or being a mother. Some of it is obvious bragging, like after we'd had sex multiple times one day he said, "I feel like if we'd had sex one more time today, you'd have to have gotten pregnant." But sometimes it seems less sex/ego based. We'll be walking around town and he'll grab my stomach and say "There could be a little baby in there." Or he'll be talking to my dog and refer to me as "Mom." We're both graduate students, mid-20's, with no money and no prospect of money for several more years. So we've already talked about how difficult it would be on both of us if I got pregnant. I'm not sure I want kids at all, and I've been up front about that. Is this mostly an ego thing, or does he really want me to have his babies? Should I ask him about it? We're mutually committed to each other, but since we haven't been together very long, we haven't done any long term life planning. Is he maybe telling me he's ready to do more of that?
junkelope Posted August 31, 2013 Posted August 31, 2013 It kind of sounds like that's the case. Has he always made comments like this, or is it a new thing? My guy does this, but I already know he can't wait to be a Daddy. It sounds like a conversation you might want to have, if you're planning on staying with him for awhile.
MrCastle Posted August 31, 2013 Posted August 31, 2013 Leave it be if they are just jokes. No need to have a serious discussion. If he comes to you wanting a real conversation about children, be honest with him.
fanine Posted August 31, 2013 Posted August 31, 2013 Has he any friends or family who are pregnant or had kids recently? That might have got him thinking.
FitChick Posted August 31, 2013 Posted August 31, 2013 Maybe he is afraid you might leave him and is insecure. He feels one way to tie you down and make you less desirable to other men is by getting you pregnant. Next time he jokes say "We can talk about it after our lavish wedding and honeymoon in Italy." Before this conversation or "joke" comes up again, ask him what he would do if he suddenly had $250,000 extra after paying off graduate school debt. Ask him if he'd want to go on a luxury cruise around the world, buy a custom top of the line sports car, buy a vacation home in the mountains, buy you expensive clothes and jewels. Then say, "I read that is what it costs nowadays to raise one child to the age of eighteen." Then find friends or relatives who have babies and kids and offer to babysit them, especially on the weekend when you'd normally go on a date. He needs a dose of reality. 1
candie13 Posted August 31, 2013 Posted August 31, 2013 Maybe he is afraid you might leave him and is insecure. He feels one way to tie you down and make you less desirable to other men is by getting you pregnant. Next time he jokes say "We can talk about it after our lavish wedding and honeymoon in Italy." Before this conversation or "joke" comes up again, ask him what he would do if he suddenly had $250,000 extra after paying off graduate school debt. Ask him if he'd want to go on a luxury cruise around the world, buy a custom top of the line sports car, buy a vacation home in the mountains, buy you expensive clothes and jewels. Then say, "I read that is what it costs nowadays to raise one child to the age of eighteen." Then find friends or relatives who have babies and kids and offer to babysit them, especially on the weekend when you'd normally go on a date. He needs a dose of reality. that, or simply tell him "I don't see a ring up my finger, sparkling in the day light. Let's have that conversation after I do, shall we?". That usually calms men down - talking about diamond rings, marriage and stuff... even helped some of them become invisible . 2
Lixxy Posted August 31, 2013 Posted August 31, 2013 Maybe he has an impregnation fetish (yep, this is a real thing)... and his only way of breaking it to you is to joke about it because seriously telling you about it would making him feel awkward or ashamed... Not seriously, actually impregnating you in real life, or even arousal at a pregnant belly (also a thing!), but impregnation fetish as in: "He ****ed you so hard you have to be pregnant, because you had such great sex!" or "I wanna fill you up with so much spunk it makes you pregnant". There are guys who have this. It's not too rare. 1
veggirl Posted August 31, 2013 Posted August 31, 2013 yeah when he does that just be all "first comes love, then comes marriage, THEN comes the baby in the baby carriage...slow your roll!" I think he is just "marking his territory" with talk like that. 1
candie13 Posted August 31, 2013 Posted August 31, 2013 Maybe he has an impregnation fetish (yep, this is a real thing)... and his only way of breaking it to you is to joke about it because seriously telling you about it would making him feel awkward or ashamed... Not seriously, actually impregnating you in real life, or even arousal at a pregnant belly (also a thing!), but impregnation fetish as in: "He ****ed you so hard you have to be pregnant, because you had such great sex!" or "I wanna fill you up with so much spunk it makes you pregnant". There are guys who have this. It's not too rare. sounds legit !
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