fanine Posted August 31, 2013 Posted August 31, 2013 After bartending for a year and being a frequent club patron for much longer than that, I've come to the conclusion that women that go to clubs frequently go for two reasons: 1) casual sex (they will find the largest collection of alpha guys at clubs) 2) attention-whoring I've yet to meet one that goes there "just to dance". If they only cared about dancing, they would just stay home and dance in their living room. It can depend on the type of club. Here in London yep there are clubs which are pretty much places where people go to hook up. But there are plenty of other clubs that are not like that at all. And what about all the women who go there in a mixed group, including their boyfriend etc or you just referring to single women?
xxoo Posted August 31, 2013 Posted August 31, 2013 Why do married men go to sports bars with the guys? They can watch football in their living room! 11
MrCastle Posted August 31, 2013 Posted August 31, 2013 does the island have WiFi/tv? What happens if you break up? Do you get kicked off the island? Yeah. Yep...you break up, and they send a boat to get you and bring you back to the main land.
candie13 Posted August 31, 2013 Posted August 31, 2013 Yeah. Yep...you break up, and they send a boat to get you and bring you back to the main land. they should make those swim back, really.
fanine Posted August 31, 2013 Posted August 31, 2013 I think if you follow the logic that 'taken' women should not be allowed to go to clubs, then where does it end? Should women with partners not go to work as they could have an affair with a co worker? Should they not go to the beach and sit in a revealing bikini with their friends, as they are 'putting it all on display'? In the end if someone has a partner and they are going to cheat and flirt with other men they could do it anywhere. They don't have to go to a club to do it...fact is as seen here women do like to go to clubs and dance and have some fun. It's more exciting to dress up, meet friends and go to a place then be in your living room where you can't exactly play loud music and the neighbours will probably complain...
fanine Posted August 31, 2013 Posted August 31, 2013 I'm referring to single women. If a woman goes to a bar alone, she's DEFINITELY looking for trouble. No question about it. If women go in groups FREQUENTLY (more than a few times per year), then what I wrote above applies. Well I sometimes go out with my girlfriends for fun. My boyfriend goes out with his male friends for some fun. I don't think when he is hitting the bars with his mates he is looking out for girls. Ditto I am not looking out for other men.
bentleychic Posted August 31, 2013 Posted August 31, 2013 I'm referring to single women. If a woman goes to a bar alone, she's DEFINITELY looking for trouble. No question about it. If women go in groups FREQUENTLY (more than a few times per year), then what I wrote above applies. That's totally and completely close minded. It's okay for men to do, but not women? Whatever. I go at least 1x a month to clubs, etc.. Normally it's to see a live band, but sometimes it's just for a girls night out with friends.
fanine Posted August 31, 2013 Posted August 31, 2013 LOL at this bad comparison. Watching sports involves guys sitting around a TV and cheering for their sports team at a bar where everybody is concentrated on the game. Dancing at clubs involves getting dressed up, going on a dance floor in front of a lot of people, getting drunk (usually), and shaking your a** in front of guys that are trying to get with you. This all occurs in a highly sexually-charged atmosphere. If you do not see a difference in these two things from that point alone, no amount of logic will convince you. Do you think all men that go to clubs without their partners are also just on the hunt for another girl?
candie13 Posted August 31, 2013 Posted August 31, 2013 So taken women shouldn't go in bars or clubs, not taken men should go to sports bars. Ok folks, what other businesses shall we close tonight? I say... cinemas. Alone or accompanied. It's dark, you never know what might happen with the person sitting next to them. I also vote for... beach bars - imagine that, in swimming suits. Let them die of thirst or bring their own water. Other ideas, anyone?
bentleychic Posted August 31, 2013 Posted August 31, 2013 We dance and dress up to enjoy ourselves and have fun. I didn't realize being involved means we can no longer have any fun. 1
fanine Posted August 31, 2013 Posted August 31, 2013 How often is sometimes? It's also a bit different when both of you are into this kind of thing. I'm thinking more in terms of a girl that goes out weekly or bi-weekly, while her boyfriend sits at home. I don't go clubbing as much now as i did when younger. But I would often go out with the girls to clubs, and now just to other places, when my boyfriend was busy with his mates or something. I'm sure many women are the same. He has his guys night out, and I have mine to enjoy some female company and catch up with friends. Makes the whole relationship more rewarding I think. We are comfortable enough with each other, trust one another enough that it is never an issue there might be an ulterior motive other than having some fun.
Maleficent Posted August 31, 2013 Posted August 31, 2013 I was out with some friends the other night, it was Meetup event, and one of the ladies brought 5 more rather attractive women to the group...most of the people in said group are spoken for or kind of older in years. So it was nice to see a series of fresh new faces to get to know. Well, turns out one of them was married, another engaged, and the rest had boyfriends. Buzzkill, but I still flirted regardless since, well, it was a "Girls Night Out" for them and well, if he ain't around what would the boyfriend know, right? I didn't flirt with the married or engaged one, but one with the boyfriends...well, boyfriends always come and go. But...anyhow, regardless, I sometimes wonder the desire to hit clubs and bars is really all that interesting to a woman that's already "taken" but, I wonder if said women get tired of being hit on by legitimately single guys and will just stay at home or find non-night club related activities to do. I even asked one of the said women to join me in a dance (the one that had a boyfriend), and she complied...so at least I got some fun out of it. LOL But it can be frustrating for guys regardless. They left early, and the rest of our regulars stayed around and I said to one o f them, "Man, I can't believe they all had boyfriends and crap". And he was like "Meh, they always do" lol Soooo basically you're saying that once a woman is in a relationship with a man, she can't have fun with her friends anymore?
Succession Posted August 31, 2013 Posted August 31, 2013 Why do married men go to sports bars with the guys? They can watch football in their living room! You know, I thought of the same analogy. But I dismissed it for several reasons. 1. Men go to sports bars to watch the game with fellow fans. It's like a cheaper, more convenient alternative to attending the sporting event live. Women don't go to clubs as an alternative to concerts, do they? 2. Men wear their sloppiest outfits at sports bars. Now, I'm not saying women wear their sexiest outfits to clubs specifically to get male attention. It is, perhaps, an unfortunate coincidence that the clothes they like wearing to clubs happen to be the same ones that attract the most male attention. 3. When I dress up, I like the fact that I get more looks and attention than when I wear sweats. Who doesn't like attention for being attractive? Why are the women in this thread arguing so hard that they don't have that natural human emotion? Why are you letting men make you feel guilty for it? Just say "yes, I like the attention" and get on with your life.
fanine Posted August 31, 2013 Posted August 31, 2013 You know, I thought of the same analogy. But I dismissed it for several reasons. 1. Men go to sports bars to watch the game with fellow fans. It's like a cheaper, more convenient alternative to attending the sporting event live. Women don't go to clubs as an alternative to concerts, do they? 2. Men wear their sloppiest outfits at sports bars. Now, I'm not saying women wear their sexiest outfits to clubs specifically to get male attention. It is, perhaps, an unfortunate coincidence that the clothes they like wearing to clubs happen to be the same ones that attract the most male attention. 3. When I dress up, I like the fact that I get more looks and attention than when I wear sweats. Who doesn't like attention for being attractive? Why are the women in this thread arguing so hard that they don't have that natural human emotion? Why are you letting men make you feel guilty for it? Just say "yes, I like the attention" and get on with your life. I don't care if I get male attention or not when I'm dressed up. I like to dress up sometimes as it makes a change from work clothes etc. it makes me feel good. I like wearing nice dresses, good shoes. I dont give a toss if a man notices or not tbh. Don't feel guilty about it. 3
bentleychic Posted August 31, 2013 Posted August 31, 2013 Shoot, you should all know that we dress up to impress other women. If we wanted to impress men, we'd just walk around naked. 7
fanine Posted August 31, 2013 Posted August 31, 2013 Not when that fun includes getting drunk and dancing with other men, often making out with them. Sure some women will do that. As some guys may well do the same if they are out without their partners. Doesn't mean all do....
bentleychic Posted August 31, 2013 Posted August 31, 2013 How does one "have sex by accident"? Just walk around and fall on a penis? I've never done anything questionable with anyone from a bar, much less "had sex by accident". 2
candie13 Posted August 31, 2013 Posted August 31, 2013 All women like attention. And if a woman wants to get attention, she doesn't need to go to a bar or a club to get it. She puts on a pair of high heels and tight dress and I swear she won't even have to cross the street to get to the supermarket to "get attention". Women, just like men, are social creatures. That's why, just like men, enjoy going to a club or a bar. Do some women (taken or not) have ulterior motives for hitting a bar / other than friends, drinks, dancing and entertainment? For sure, just like a lot of men (taken or not). Denying women the social component of their behavior is not considering them as belonging to the human specie. Now, if you think women belong to a social skills-lacking subspecies... that is a whole different thread. 1
fanine Posted August 31, 2013 Posted August 31, 2013 More women lie about it. Girls night out. Yea sure girls night out. You sound very bitter. So basically do you think if any woman goes out to a public place without her partner with her friends she is likely to cheat? And do you have the same opinion of men who go out without their partners? 1
Succession Posted August 31, 2013 Posted August 31, 2013 Watching sports involves guys sitting around a TV and cheering for their sports team at a bar where everybody is concentrated on the game. Dancing at clubs involves getting dressed up, going on a dance floor in front of a lot of people, getting drunk (usually), and shaking your a** in front of guys that are trying to get with you. This all occurs in a highly sexually-charged atmosphere. Obviously we were posting at the same time. I agree with your points. For the record, if a guy was going out to clubs with his male friends, I suspect that women wouldn't think it was just a fun way for him to hang out with his friends. They would be nervous as hell. And, they would be equally justified as a man feeling nervous about his woman. Men aren't looking to enforce a double standard here. Although it hasn't been discussed in this particular thread, I think that women may be. 4
crederer Posted August 31, 2013 Posted August 31, 2013 You're right. Any woman that's taken should sit at home, cook dinner and make babies. 2
fanine Posted August 31, 2013 Posted August 31, 2013 Obviously we were posting at the same time. I agree with your points. For the record, if a guy was going out to clubs with his male friends, I suspect that women wouldn't think it was just a fun way for him to hang out with his friends. They would be nervous as hell. And, they would be equally justified as a man feeling nervous about his woman. Men aren't looking to enforce a double standard here. Although it hasn't been discussed in this particular thread, I think that women may be. I don't feel nervous when my boyfriend goes to a club. I trust him. If he really wanted to cheat, he could find a woman anywhere really. But I don't believe he would. Like he trusts me. I would probably have far more opportunities on work trips etc than in a club. But he doesn't feel nervous about that. Ditto when my other half has work trips abroad...
candie13 Posted August 31, 2013 Posted August 31, 2013 You're right. Any woman that's taken should sit at home, cook dinner and make babies. Don't forget washing the floors ... I like mine squeaky clean ! 1
bentleychic Posted August 31, 2013 Posted August 31, 2013 More women lie about it. Girls night out. Yea sure girls night out. Drunk and scantily clad at a club when she tells her boyfriend she is going somewhere else. You bet she's more likely to cheat. Aw, someone thinks women care way more about them than they actually do. OR someone is a bitter woman hater b/c those drunk and scantily clad women don't hit on them. Bless it's heart.
Succession Posted August 31, 2013 Posted August 31, 2013 All women like attention. Women, just like men, are social creatures. That's why, just like men, enjoy going to a club or a bar. Do some women (taken or not) have ulterior motives for hitting a bar / other than friends, drinks, dancing and entertainment? For sure, just like a lot of men (taken or not). Candie, I couldn't agree with you more. The part of this thread that's a little unsettling is the women you're directly contradicting: I don't care if I get male attention or not when I'm dressed up. I like to dress up sometimes as it makes a change from work clothes etc. it makes me feel good. I like wearing nice dresses, good shoes. I dont give a toss if a man notices or not tbh. Don't feel guilty about it. Oddly enough, she "liked" your post. Some people just make no attempt to think critically about their own behavior, so when they act in a way that's confusing or frustrating to others, there's no empathy. 1
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