mixeypixey Posted August 31, 2013 Posted August 31, 2013 Ever been swept off your feet by a guy who struggles with his life (career wise etc)? Of course they never show that dark side in the beginning... but when they eventually do... what do you girls think of it? Is it true that all women expect their men to be men? Or any of you fall in love with a person just because they are that person..? Is someone accepting you whole-y (?) a fantasy? Rain or shine you love em no matter what? Or is that just a fantasy?
darkmoon Posted August 31, 2013 Posted August 31, 2013 a guy struggling with his life? over the age of 26 or so, he is a loser who must have learned nothing, he could even be a habitual moocher! under the age of 26, he needs his family, or even meds if you want to feel special to him by supporting him (money or morale) alright, help him, but be aware that you might not get support from him because you have chosen to be the more able of the two of you, which leaves him never having to be responsible for himself, let alone you as well I would run away from him or just see him less, I have worn the T-shirt twice over this sort of mess, yup, mess
Author mixeypixey Posted August 31, 2013 Author Posted August 31, 2013 Well I'm talking about a different kind. I know the type you're describing. A loser who doesn't care and is not willing to try and is happy (somewhat) and too lazy to change.. But say someone who does try real hard.. makes the effort etc.. but just has trouble getting there..
darkmoon Posted August 31, 2013 Posted August 31, 2013 Well I'm talking about a different kind. I know the type you're describing. A loser who doesn't care and is not willing to try and is happy (somewhat) and too lazy to change.. But say someone who does try real hard.. makes the effort etc.. but just has trouble getting there.. if a potential breadwinner can not get an income going, well, he will not be much of provider for any family, cheap cute dates are fine at age 19, but not forever, sorry you wrote "trouble getting there" try a different goal that is less trouble to get to others might have a different take on this 1
todreaminblue Posted September 1, 2013 Posted September 1, 2013 personally i don't think a guy who is jobless is messy.....there are reasons why people are jobless....none of them involve messiness.....i would want to know he wants to do something with his life.......that he has dreams and aspirations that dont involve the accumulation of money for personal gain..unless its fundraising...then i get passionate i am not materialistic, i want to go a journey when my family has left the nest.....i will be doing it off my own bat...with one suitcase...and i dont expect to be paid other than to be able to eat and live......in all honesty i would annoy the crap of someone who was driven in a career field if were to be their gf.....conversations with me would be pretty lacklustre...i dont plan to have roots and settle and build a nest egg.....i also am not working.....who am i to judge......deb
Author mixeypixey Posted September 1, 2013 Author Posted September 1, 2013 Are you ignorant, or just stupid? Life is a constant struggle, it isn't linear. You have ups, you have downs. I'm around that age, and I'm not a success, but I have things I am working towards. Amen brother! Life ain't easy. I was quite drunk and pretty frikin down when I wrote this... I dunno there are many different types of women who want different things... I guess sometimes we just want that someone who'll just understand you and take you for who are... and can also be that fire to push you and her further in life... that's much better isn't it?
Els Posted September 1, 2013 Posted September 1, 2013 When I read your thread title, I thought you were talking about leaving your socks out, really... 1
nicolewest Posted September 1, 2013 Posted September 1, 2013 Depends. Everyone struggles at some point. The most important part is what you do when you are going through a difficult time and how you change [hopefully for the better] Ive dated messy guys. When a person is always going through something it wears both parties down.
EsmerKiss77 Posted September 1, 2013 Posted September 1, 2013 To be honest i think younger women may be more likely to love you for you. Once a woman has a career and children or goals its hard to accept another persons "hard times" for very long. Eventually, the question will come up to when you will be able to get it together. Ive dated a few messy guys and i have to say it feels more like being a mother than in a relationship with a grown man. But then again, i have a baby on the way and a strong career going for myself, so i look for that in a significant other as well. Had this been years ago when i didnt know what i wanted and was just living my life, i would easily date a guy who was "messy". My priorities have changed. So i guess it depends on where the girl is at on her life too, im sure youll find someone who will accept you for who you are. Be wary though if it lasts too long (a couple of years or so) and youre still in the same predicament, things may become a little bumpy, as things and people are constantly changing. 1
Author mixeypixey Posted September 1, 2013 Author Posted September 1, 2013 To be honest i think younger women may be more likely to love you for you. Once a woman has a career and children or goals its hard to accept another persons "hard times" for very long. Eventually, the question will come up to when you will be able to get it together. Ive dated a few messy guys and i have to say it feels more like being a mother than in a relationship with a grown man. But then again, i have a baby on the way and a strong career going for myself, so i look for that in a significant other as well. Had this been years ago when i didnt know what i wanted and was just living my life, i would easily date a guy who was "messy". My priorities have changed. So i guess it depends on where the girl is at on her life too, im sure youll find someone who will accept you for who you are. Be wary though if it lasts too long (a couple of years or so) and youre still in the same predicament, things may become a little bumpy, as things and people are constantly changing. Well I don't really drag on about it. Some of my past girlfriends they hear about it once and they just run off. Some of them don't really mind. I don't know it's very heartbreaking and traumatizing cuz the same thing happened with my recent girlfriend and that just drove me to the ground. She's still young so she didn't really understand wtf was going on with me... I'd say 8/10 girls would have a similar reaction but still.. I have "emotional" problems which hindered my progress after highschool and stuff.. it just slowed everything down and now I'm in a little bit of a limbo. I'm going back to school soon and I'm trying my best to sort myself out. But sometimes life just deals some people cards and I just really wish I was in a better position right now. Sucks. But yeah.. I guess I'm just asking if anyone believes in that "there's one person out the for everyone", who will just change your world. Some people tell me you'll really change when you meet your wife. I dunno. Or are we all just in some kind of rat race to be with the most suitable person in our general area haha some serious sh*t *party over here*
Author mixeypixey Posted September 1, 2013 Author Posted September 1, 2013 When I read your thread title, I thought you were talking about leaving your socks out, really... I'm good with laundry! So..... no.. LOL
daisylane Posted September 1, 2013 Posted September 1, 2013 When I fall in love with someone, I accept and love everything about them. (which doesn't mean that I might complain every now and then :] ) But what someone does for a living isn't important to me. Also I don't expect a man to 'take care of me' financially, as it is my job to do that. So to answer your question, if I love someone it doesn't bother me that he is 'messy'. We all have our struggles as someone else pointed out and I would feel hypocritical to judge someone based on the fact that he is struggling in an area. 2
EsmerKiss77 Posted September 1, 2013 Posted September 1, 2013 I believe there is someone out there for everyone. You'll find them but the truth comes when you realize no one is going to be able to change your life, only you can do that. Don't depend on anyone for that, because 1. You'll find yourself disappointed a lot and 2. You'll never give people a chance to love them for who they are, instead youll be loving them for what they can do for you. 1
Scales Posted September 6, 2013 Posted September 6, 2013 On one hand I think everyone should be striving towards goals and ambitions. He may be sending off red flags with a lack of motivation and hygiene, which is anyone's fault. On the other hand, saying you won't date a guy who isn't "successful" is like saying you won't date a girl because she isn't a D cup.
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