Myab23 Posted August 30, 2013 Posted August 30, 2013 What are good reasons for divorce? I know the obvious ones like cheating. But feeling like you love someone more than they love you...that they don't put in the effort they should... that they take you for granted, don't look at you the same way, etc... is that enough to want to leave? I just have been having these intense feelings lately that this relationship maybe was a mistake that I should have ended years ago, that I've settled...like maybe there was someone better out there for me. Has anyone felt this way?
hayewils Posted August 30, 2013 Posted August 30, 2013 yes, I have been married to a woman the last 4 years where I did not feel she really loved me.. she only told me she loved me on her own 3 times over those four years. any other time she said I love you it was instigated by me. She never tried to put anything into our relationship, I was always trying and even had my kids tell me one day out of the blue that they saw me trying all the time, that she never did anything. hearing that really made me think, it was crazy... I didn't think the kids noticed but they did. it really told me that you don't understand what you see, unless your on the outside looking in. my reasons for divorce are cheatings and beatings.. but also In my opinion there are other things such as being treated like crap period. if your with someone who expects you to do everything for them, I would run unless they do the same for me. relationships ARE TWO WAY STREETS. they go both ways. if its a one way street, then I believe I would bail.. yes, I would bail. ive learned that lesson. however, I do know that there are people who tend to not feel that loving as you do, or saying I love you is not important to them.. they tend to have an issue with it, but not mean that they don't love you. am I getting across? Some people in this world are just not affectionate as others. my stepfather isn't, but he shows he cares in other ways.. its in the person. I myself love affection, I love hearing that I am loved.. its a security thing. doesn't mean I want or need it all the time, I don't. Its only that I like to know it from the person who is so so special to me. I don't think its something to divorce over, yet.. I think its a discussion that should happen first.
hayewils Posted August 30, 2013 Posted August 30, 2013 needless to say..my wife left me almost 6 months ago.. They very person who I felt didn't really love me.. I haven't heard or seen her since. something to think about.
Author Myab23 Posted August 30, 2013 Author Posted August 30, 2013 Thank you for your reply and I am sorry for your situation. I will discuss with him before I decide to do anything. I've tried many times to tell him how I feel and he just gets angry which compounds the problem as it makes me doubt our relationship even more. I'm just so tired of trying to make something work or make him feel something that he doesn't feel. But I will try to talk again, maybe with a more serious approach.
Mr. Lucky Posted August 30, 2013 Posted August 30, 2013 I'm just so tired of trying to make something work or make him feel something that he doesn't feel. But I will try to talk again, maybe with a more serious approach. You and your spouse sound like ideal candidates for MC. It may be as as simple as an inability on his part to express his feeling in terms you understand and appreciate. Certainly something I'd try before considering divorce... Mr. Lucky 1
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