Capucine Posted August 29, 2013 Posted August 29, 2013 (edited) My friend of 4 years convinced me to date him 5 months ago. It took him 2 months to convince me since we were living in two different cities. We clicked right away as a couple..had great conversations. He is a very successful guy and a workaholic..has his own business, takes care of his sick parents..his mom has Alzheimer's and is in bad stages. He is going through a lot in life currently and there are times that he says he is losing it all. Two weeks ago we where together for a week in his town. Had a great time but of course he was working even when we were together and his mind was elsewhere. I am not a needy girl, but as a woman, I need to see a minimum of emotions and affection to be able to stay in the relationship. Although he always said he'd chased me for years and he wanted to marry me etc etc..he never really said he loved me. May be once or twice. After our meeting two weeks ago, his workload doubled and I never even heard a sweet word from him. Not even once. I told him I missed hm like once or twice and he said nothing back. So I stopped..We were about to meet last weekend but he canceled and said he had to work..also said he could not arrange to meet this coming weekend..I confronted him and asked if he still wanted to be with me..that this was an LDR and for me to be able to continue, I needed to see some signs that he cared.. we got into a huge fight. He said he was tired of my craziness, attitude and bull**** comments..that all I had brought to his life in the past months was nothing but stress..that he panicked everytime he spoke to me..that he was on edge and I was pushing him..that this relationship was all about me and I never even once supported him ..he said he was done. Then immediately deleted and blocked me on FB. I wrote him an email..said I had no clue what I had done but that I was sorry he was hurting..that I wanted to be there for him..etc etc.. 4 minutes after sending the email he called me, shouting and screaming that why I had contacted him..why I hadn't waited to send it in 3 weeks or two months! he said he asked me to leave him alone, that I played mind games..that I drained the energy out of him, that he wanted me gone..that if I f*** with him he'd gather every ounce of energy he had left and would destroy me..screamed and yelled at me to F off and never to contact him ever again! I was shaking...and was in shock. This was not the guy I'd known for the past 5 years. I don't know what to think..He forced me into a relationship with him, made me believe I was the one for him, got me engaged in his problems and his life ..then dumped me in 2 days..just like that. I really don't know what to think. I am worried about him because he truly is going through a lot, but I don't understand all the rage and hatred towards me. I don't get it why I should be his punching bag.. I am definitely not contacting him, but I'm wondering if this is a phase and may be he'll contact me ever or if he's really done. I feel used and hurt.. Edited August 30, 2013 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
Sparkle304 Posted August 29, 2013 Posted August 29, 2013 It must be a confusing time for you. And I'm sure you are hurting. But please be truthful with yourself as it is the only way to heal. You stated that he "forced [you] into a relationship with him". Unless there was abuse taking place (which I hope there wasn't), you entered this relationship by choice. You didn't have to become party to his problems and issues. For some reason, that is the path you chose to follow. Right now, you have the power to make more choices. You can choose to try to reconcile with this hurtful man (which will not end well), or you take this relationship as a learning experience and move on. And if you're not able to make a decision, choose option #2. 1
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