allyk12 Posted August 28, 2013 Posted August 28, 2013 Thread title meant to say "I need help with a breakup" Hello there Thanks in advance for reading this, I hope someone in a similar position can advise me or some help can be thrown my way. Here goes. My long-distance girlfriend has recently just ended the relationship. It was 4 years old. We quarraled alot but it ws never serious and the love was very very strong. She came to live with me twice recently for a month, in Feb and in May, and it seemed to be going well and we had plans to move in together permanently. Last week we were on holiday together and there was an issue one day on the holiday. She said she received a Facebook message from a (married) colleague who said he liked her and wanted to sleep with her. She seemed flattered by this but promised me she said no and was not interested. I believed her. I proposed to her a few days later and she accepted and everything was going great until Thursday. I held off on announcing the engagement to my family as they were angry about her, nothing major but worth waiting the day for. She didn't like this and decided to stop contacting me. On Friday she managed to log into my Facebook account without my permission and read messages i'd been sending another girl. This girl was my friend and at all times remained my friend. My partner didn't like her and i ceased all contact with this girl in May however in early August i messaged her hoping she was doing well. The messages that were sent were simple and not confusing to anyone. We hope we can meet again after our friendship ended because of my GF and that maybe one day it will happen. She then accused me of cheating and said it was over even though i did nothing wrong. I was angry as i thought the other girl sent her a message, i accused her (wrongly) of doing something when she didn't and shen then sent her own messages to my girlfriend which were not very nice in the slightest. Despite numerous texts and emails re-assuring her i did nothing wrong, she maintains it's over and that she didn't want me to contact her again. Over the 4 years we've had 'mini-break ups' and we've always got back together but now I feel she is serious. She even sent me an email saying she would pawn the ring and send me the money. I know she has done wrong, and I was wrong for postponing the engagement, but what is happening? Was this a smokescreen of her doings? Does she just need her own space? I love her greatly and i'd like to think after 4 years she does too...but i am so confused, hurt and in need of assurances as to where i stand. Thanks again for reading folks, i hope some can help.
barky2 Posted August 28, 2013 Posted August 28, 2013 Maybe I missed it skim reading but how long have you guys been broken up? Why did she check in on you? Was it because she was doing something wrong? Id once again try and talk to her about it. Guilty conscious I think is written all over this situation. I may be wrong. Barky
Author allyk12 Posted August 28, 2013 Author Posted August 28, 2013 Maybe I missed it skim reading but how long have you guys been broken up? Why did she check in on you? Was it because she was doing something wrong? Id once again try and talk to her about it. Guilty conscious I think is written all over this situation. I may be wrong. Barky Why she checked on me i simply don't know. She logged in using the save details feature on Chrome. She claimed it was done by accidant at work helping a colleague by giving her/him the laptop. Facebook showed it was done at 11:14pm her time. As far as i know, she said she didn't mean it but she wanted to find a reason to "forgive me after postponing the announcment of the engagemeng" I have sent her about 8 SMS and 4 emails, all categorically telling her I was not cheating, but she has wrongly assumed on some messages to my friend that I have. This despite showing her a full Skype conversation that had happened hours before this all happened with me saying to the friend "you are my friend only, nothing more"/ I sent my final email yesterday afternoon, she has read it twice (i have read-notify on my email) and has no responsed. I hope i've not been vague...i'm very grateful for any help.
barky2 Posted August 28, 2013 Posted August 28, 2013 Honestly...man ...I think she has a guilty concious.( spelled right,?) I think she was looking for something to ease her guilt . She found it and now has ammo. Stop contacting her. You don't need this in your life man. Idk what she's up to....but some things up. Barky
Author allyk12 Posted August 28, 2013 Author Posted August 28, 2013 Honestly...man ...I think she has a guilty concious.( spelled right,?) I think she was looking for something to ease her guilt . She found it and now has ammo. Stop contacting her. You don't need this in your life man. Idk what she's up to....but some things up. Barky I'd be lieing if I didn't think this too. It hurts like hell and I know it's gonna hurt alot more...but i'll save this threat and let you know how I get on in the days ahead. Thanks for your insight, I appreciate it.
barky2 Posted August 28, 2013 Posted August 28, 2013 Just stay strong bro. Let it all go. Easier said than done...believe me I know. Focus on yourself...and attracting someone 10x better. Keep posting when needed. Barky
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