Coryg2011 Posted August 28, 2013 Posted August 28, 2013 So I met this girl last week at college, we had a math class together and I had an extra copy of my book, so she offered to buy it from me. She gave me her number and I text her and we hit it off, that whole week we would meet and talk for hours on end, about really intimate and personal stuff, she confided in me a great deal and I did too. I asked her if she wanted to hangout at my house, and she agreed, at this point we had been holding hands and flirting quite a lot. She came over and we laid in my bed and watched a movie, I made a move and kissed her, she immediately started French kissing me and we did that for a half hour or so, it got heated so much that I was on to of her in between her legs running my hands all over her body. After that I took her home and I thought it was a definite that we were going to keep doing that and eventually hook up and possibly date. We hungout again that weekend, and the very next day she sends me a message saying she thinks its be best if we stayed friends because she wasn't ready for a relationship, she's a freshmen in college and she said she's got a lot going on in her life and I would just complicate things, as if I hadn't already, but before this we had both said we liked each other multiple times and I still do and so does she, the only thing that's changed is that she keep saying she just wants to stay friends, we haven't hungout at my apartment since that day, but I want to ask her to come over so we can at least be alone and I can talk to her in private, I really like this girl and I want it to work, but I'm not feeling the same vibes from her since she said it, and she said she's been thinking about it, and she had to make a mature decision, I want to wait for her but if In the end she never intended to get in a relationship I'll feel very angry. On a side note before she told me she wants to be just friends she would always say I was the perfect guy and said her parents and brothers and sisters would really like me, idk how that came to be but I just want to get her to realize that I need her in my life. Thank you, Cory
Philosoraptor Posted August 28, 2013 Posted August 28, 2013 Well if you don't want to "just be friends" make that clear. You don't have to submit to less just because that's what she wants. Let her know you want to take her out on a real date, or she needs to meet someone who only wants to be friends. Have a backbone and don't accept less than you want. If you're not comfortable being friends right now you don't have to be.
Author Coryg2011 Posted August 28, 2013 Author Posted August 28, 2013 So if I ask her on a real date, she'll probably say she just wants to be friends and stop talking to me, which isn't good..but I still want to talk to her...
Keenly Posted August 28, 2013 Posted August 28, 2013 Just say " look, I have enough friends, I don't need any more. I like you, and we can either just hang out and be a little more than friends and worry about a relationship some other time, or you can take a risk, plunge in head first, and who knows, you might actually find that you can have a really great time. "
NateC Posted August 28, 2013 Posted August 28, 2013 Be happy that you've figured this out early on and not months down the road when you've developed true feelings for her. As others have said, you basically have nothing to lose about being up front and asking her out on a real date. If she says no, you're in no worse position but you have your questions answered. If she says yes, then you've opened a door and also answered your questions. Good luck.
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