paigej91 Posted August 28, 2013 Posted August 28, 2013 Normally I don't think much of going to a guy's apartment after a date given that it went well and there's chemistry. With this guy, I had gone a month without seeing him (we've been dating casually and intermittently) so I invited him on a date to this art festival. I had a lovely time and we ended up walking about 4 miles afterwards and stopping to eat (he payed even though I offered to pay my part). We stop at his apartment because I had dropped some of my stuff off at his place earlier- so I had to pick it up. We walk in as I'm telling a story (that's actually pretty funny, not just me rambling), and the instant I finish, he starts making the moves. Keep in mind we hadn't seen each other for a month, so while the date was great, it felt kind of weird since we were also sort of "catching up". Him making the moves on me the instant we get to his place made me feel.....used. It's as though he only went on this date and walk so that we could possibly hook-up later. I probably wouldn't be annoyed by this if he had set the mood once we got home rather than just going for it right away. Does he only want to be FWB or is it possible he really (genuinely) likes me that much and couldn't wait? I sometimes have trouble determining when a guy is being a player and when he just has a sex drive.
SJC2008 Posted August 28, 2013 Posted August 28, 2013 Does he only want to be FWB or is it possible he really (genuinely) likes me that much and couldn't wait? I sometimes have trouble determining when a guy is being a player and when he just has a sex drive. You're going to have to ask him a question that's seemingly harder than havning sex in this day and age: "What are you looking for?" 1
Author paigej91 Posted August 28, 2013 Author Posted August 28, 2013 You're going to have to ask him a question that's seemingly harder than having sex in this day and age: "What are you looking for?" I asked him this early on and it's not entirely clear. He said he's not looking for a fling, but he hasn't moved things up a notch relationship-wise/emotionally either.
SJC2008 Posted August 28, 2013 Posted August 28, 2013 I asked him this early on and it's not entirely clear. He's not looking for a fling, but he sure hasn't moved things up a notch relationship-wise/emotionally. Ok good you asked him. Saying he's not looking for a fling isn't good enough. He still has an "out" in that there were not exclusivity talks. If he's not trying to take you off the market you have your answer. 1
soccerrprp Posted August 28, 2013 Posted August 28, 2013 Normally I don't think much of going to a guy's apartment after a date given that it went well and there's chemistry. With this guy, I had gone a month without seeing him (we've been dating casually and intermittently) so I invited him on a date to this art festival. I had a lovely time and we ended up walking about 4 miles afterwards and stopping to eat (he payed even though I offered to pay my part). We stop at his apartment because I had dropped some of my stuff off at his place earlier- so I had to pick it up. We walk in as I'm telling a story (that's actually pretty funny, not just me rambling), and the instant I finish, he starts making the moves. Keep in mind we hadn't seen each other for a month, so while the date was great, it felt kind of weird since we were also sort of "catching up". Him making the moves on me the instant we get to his place made me feel.....used. It's as though he only went on this date and walk so that we could possibly hook-up later. I probably wouldn't be annoyed by this if he had set the mood once we got home rather than just going for it right away. Does he only want to be FWB or is it possible he really (genuinely) likes me that much and couldn't wait? I sometimes have trouble determining when a guy is being a player and when he just has a sex drive. Eesh. Well, you're on again and off again is an indication that he's not taking YOU SERIOUSLY right now. And his wanting to jump into the sack after some absence is also an indication that he's mightily interested in sex right NOW. I would say the best way, but, by no means, fool-proof, is to lay-off on the sex and see if he's willing to date you, become exclusive for some time. Tell him and see if he's interested in doing that. If not, then he doesn't think you're worth it, so move on. If so, time will only tell, really.
Recommended Posts