orangegirl Posted August 24, 2013 Posted August 24, 2013 Yes and given that the original poster is normally on the infidelity board, this definitely feels more like a jab or a "learn your lesson" type of "tale" to OW/OM. I don't think so. It seems real. but again, I just read a lot of these posts ppl make. I usually don't respond. I'm shy.....and scared of what ppl say.
fanine Posted August 24, 2013 Posted August 24, 2013 I guess. But people do it all the time. Right?? You really think there are many married couples out there getting a third party involved who does not know the full story? Sure there are couples who go for threesomes but the third party usually knows the score surely.... 2
So happy together Posted August 24, 2013 Posted August 24, 2013 You really think there are many married couples out there getting a third party involved who does not know the full story? Sure there are couples who go for threesomes but the third party usually knows the score surely.... I agree with the others, OP is making a point. There really is no difference between this and an A... someone is in the dark. Except for the fact that it's not the wife who's being deceived. 1
crederer Posted August 25, 2013 Posted August 25, 2013 Well....your friend isn't a victim she knows the guy is married and she's falling for the most basic and commonly used lines ever used. It's her own damn fault for getting with a married man. Instead of the spouse getting hurt, it's going to be her. Stay out of the kitchen if you don't want to get burned.
wanting more Posted August 25, 2013 Posted August 25, 2013 Well....your friend isn't a victim she knows the guy is married and she's falling for the most basic and commonly used lines ever used. It's her own damn fault for getting with a married man. Instead of the spouse getting hurt, it's going to be her. Stay out of the kitchen if you don't want to get burned. What about when a BS post how "the OW seduced my husband and wouldn't back down till he gave in to her". Roles reversed but it's the same thing. If its a game for this couple, I can see it happening. By the way, if this is real, you've got some fu*ked up friends. 2
jlola Posted August 25, 2013 Posted August 25, 2013 I wonder why this is so difficult to believe. I have 2 male friends who were in affairs. Both admitted MW laughed at BS or made fun of him in some way. Both thought nothing of it back then. I asked if they could not see the cruelty in that. But I guess AP bond in that way. One friends MW even laughed about her BS's ex wife. Though she would never admit she had an affair with BS while he was still married to his 1st ife. She told my friend her BS's ex-wife was so desperate to keep the marriage, she pretended to be pregnant. she thought it funny. I saw no humor in that. It was sad. I do see the irony of this story.Many OW/OM are willing to help betray,help plot against, laugh about,put down BS they may not know and rarely think of the pain they are helping to cause. But when the shoe is on the other foot and they are the ones who may be laughed at ,used or plotted against, then it is cruel? IT is cruel either way! When I ask one of my male friends who left MW if he did not empathize with BS and think of the pain he would endure he were the one being betrayed, he said in the affair, he did not think about that. But now, being more rational, he knows it would destroy him emotionally had the shoe been on the other foot. 3
HopingAgain Posted August 25, 2013 Posted August 25, 2013 I don't see what's so supposedly far fetched about this story. I guess all the naysayers don't believe married couples swing either! LOL. It takes all kinds in life and some people get off on some off the wall sordid stuff. There are all kinds of deviants out there. Those that don't want to believe this particular story just don't want to think of an OW in the betrayediu role.... 1
Author Betterthanthis13 Posted August 25, 2013 Author Posted August 25, 2013 The only thing thing I made up in this story is the fact that these people are my friends. They are definitely not my friends. I cant stand any of them to be honest. I think they are all pretty disgusting. Jimmy is a client of mine and I am unlucky enough to know people like this, and had the (not) pleasure of spending time on his yacht and meeting his atrocious wife Alexis, as well as meet Kara briefly, who was on the boat. Hiding in plain sight I guess. I also changed their names. I always think telling is the right thing to do, I'm always on the infidelity board talking about telling. This one stumps me. Kara really does apparently think she is getting away with a secret affair. I think Jimmy started off as more of a sugar daddy to her but its apparently been going on for more than 2 years and she didnt come across as a pure gold digger, she seemed to genuinely want to be around him. But I could be wrong. Maybe she is just using him and could care less. I'm pretty sure she's not the only girl on the side either. The wife is a real piece of work too. My work has me interact with people I really don't care for sometimes (spoiled rotten wealthy people) in the land of plastic surgery an fakeness, where it is not all that uncommon at all for young, very pretty girls to date wealthy older (often married) men. In this case it seems like there is no clear cut right and wrong. It's just all wrong. Kara's not my friend but I still sort of feel bad for the girl, on the other hand the last thing I need to do is get further involved in this situation to even find out what the deal is with her. But that makes me a hypocrite.... But I really don't want to be a part of my eccentric wealthy clients lame soap opera life either. So I just posted it on here instead because the whole thing just bothers me 2
Author Betterthanthis13 Posted August 25, 2013 Author Posted August 25, 2013 I do understand why you guys would think I'm just starting trouble or trying to prove some sort of "point" but really I don't see the point in any of the games these people are plying, it's all just sick A year ago (before my own life exploded from a Dday) I think I would have been oblivious to the whole situation (or ignored it and dismissed it as "crazy rich people problems" because I am not a fan of that whole crowd of people here. I wasn't socializing with these people by choice, it's just a function of my job to have to attend stupid things like this sometimes. 1
whichwayisup Posted August 25, 2013 Posted August 25, 2013 a friend of mine (Kara) is in love with a MM (Jimmy) and has been with him for 2 years. He tells her he is in love with her but can't leave his family even though his marriage is dead and he and his wife (Alexis) don't have sex anymore. They have 2 kids. He says he will divorce her when the time is right. Kara is head over heels for Jimmy. She thinks that when Jimmy finally leaves Alexis, he will marry her. I also know Jimmy and Alexis personally. I'm freaking out. Alexis has a fetish where she likes to make Jimmy sleep with other women. They are swingers but it just really turns Alexis on to think that Jimmy can get girls to fall in love with him. They laugh about Kara and how gullible she is to fall for it. Alexis reads all her texts and gets a kick out of the fact that Kara is so smitten with her husband. Jimmy and Alexis are freaks and use this scenario to better their crazy sex life. I'm afraid if I tell Kara she will be upset, because she loves Jimmy and I don't want to hurt her. And if I told, Alexis and Jimmy would be mad at me. It seems like everyone is happy and getting what they want. I feel like I should mind my own business. What should I do? I would talk to Jimmy and his wife first. Tell them that what he/they are doing to your friend is just plain cruel and mean - TO lead her on like that and then laugh about it when she IS falling for him. I couldn't care less if they are swingers, good for them -- But what they are doing isn't right, purposely messing with your friend? It's wrong and hurtful. Uhmm, how good of friends are you with them? If anything, you might want to reassess your friendship with them and be a supportive friend to Kara..She IS going to need you when you tell her the truth. Yeah it'll hurt but it's better for her to know that it's been one big lie/joke so she can get over him.
whichwayisup Posted August 25, 2013 Posted August 25, 2013 I don't know. Kara is no saint either. Shes not a very nice person in general- plus Jimmy and Alexis have a lot of money- jimmy pays for Kara's condo and her car and gives her an allowance every week so she doesn't have to work. It's complicated. I know she thinks Jimmy loves her but- it looks like she is using him anyway. OK, then maybe you should dump ALL of them as friends since they ALL don't seem very nice for various reasons and stay out of it completely. Do more than just deleting them off of facebook though. That isn't going to end the friendship, but telling them goodbye will.
whichwayisup Posted August 25, 2013 Posted August 25, 2013 Just a sick thought here- If you do end up telling your friend the truth she can play a joke on them. 1-"I am pregnant!" 2-"Better get tested for STD's as I am positive for *insert std of your choice*!"
BetrayedH Posted August 25, 2013 Posted August 25, 2013 For what it's worth, I believe the OP. I've kept up with BetterThanThis since she started posting and while I could name a dozen BSs that would enjoy stirring the pot, she's not one of them. She also wasn't married to her wayward boyfriend and so I think a lot of the deep anger suffered by BSs is pretty absent in her posts. Just my $.02 As for the original post, good lord, I thought I had seen it all. It shouldn't surprise me, really. My exwife and the OM really enjoyed the idea of cuckolding me and wrote about it on a site dedicated to such stories. BTT, I don't engage in a lot of mental gymnastics. Regardless of this woman's lack of innocence, she doesn't deserve to have years of her life wasted by people that are manipulating her. He's gotten her to fall in love with him and strung her along in a sick joke. She may have some of it coming but enough is enough. Don't let her spend years wasted on a lie. Just as with a BS, give her the truth so she can move on with life. And then yes, disengage from these freaks altogether. 4
Author Betterthanthis13 Posted August 25, 2013 Author Posted August 25, 2013 Just a sick thought here- If you do end up telling your friend the truth she can play a joke on them. 1-"I am pregnant!" 2-"Better get tested for STD's as I am positive for *insert std of your choice*!" That made me laugh ^^ I'm probably just going to stay out of it because they aren't "friends", just people i know. and I'm not putting my job in jeapordy for any of these people. If they were friends (god forbid my life involved people like that ugh) I probably would find a way to tell Kara... I dunno maybe I can find a way to tell her that won't cause me any drama. I don't have any of her contact info and it would be weird of me to ask for it. So that's a problem. She never was on my Facebook but I could probably find her there. But if I contact her on FB she will know who I am. This really is NONE of my business...I can't really justify getting involved and sticking my nose where it doesn't belong but then I think- what if this girl really is being played... Yep I feel like a hypocrite
Author Betterthanthis13 Posted August 25, 2013 Author Posted August 25, 2013 For what it's worth, I believe the OP. I've kept up with BetterThanThis since she started posting and while I could name a dozen BSs that would enjoy stirring the pot, she's not one of them. She also wasn't married to her wayward boyfriend and so I think a lot of the deep anger suffered by BSs is pretty absent in her posts. Just my $.02 As for the original post, good lord, I thought I had seen it all. It shouldn't surprise me, really. My exwife and the OM really enjoyed the idea of cuckolding me and wrote about it on a site dedicated to such stories. BTT, I don't engage in a lot of mental gymnastics. Regardless of this woman's lack of innocence, she doesn't deserve to have years of her life wasted by people that are manipulating her. He's gotten her to fall in love with him and strung her along in a sick joke. She may have some of it coming but enough is enough. Don't let her spend years wasted on a lie. Just as with a BS, give her the truth so she can move on with life. And then yes, disengage from these freaks altogether. Lol maybe I need a new line of work that doesn't bring me around such lovely people.... I wonder if I could find out where she gets her hair done and just have a random kid drop off a simple letter in a sealed envelope for her there or something. That probably couldn't get traced back to me.
BetrayedH Posted August 25, 2013 Posted August 25, 2013 I'm not usually a fan of the anonymous tip but in this case, I think you're into something. How about using a fake email address or FB account?
BetrayedH Posted August 25, 2013 Posted August 25, 2013 Another thought regarding the "believability factor" here: BetterThanThis's wayward boyfriend used massage parlors for happy endings and trolled for hookers to get BJs. There was no particular "other woman" with whom she has a beef. 1
ComingInHot Posted August 25, 2013 Posted August 25, 2013 did I read it right that the twisted M coue is Paying for the OW who Thinks She's the one duping the Wife?!
jlola Posted August 25, 2013 Posted August 25, 2013 And that person is usually the betrayed spouse. For a huge change, it's the person who CHOSE to walk into it. She deserves whatever she gets. I once read a story on a swinger couple. Seems the wife had an easy time just getting men to sleep with her. But the husband said many times he would pretend to be single to the women he would involve himself with. Apparently some women were freaked out being involved with a swinger. So he did whatever he had to do to get his way. Pure selfishness.
Author Betterthanthis13 Posted August 25, 2013 Author Posted August 25, 2013 did I read it right that the twisted M coue is Paying for the OW who Thinks She's the one duping the Wife?! Essentially, yeah I guess that sums it up. The married couple has more money than they know what to do with so the financial part is definitely not affecting them. The way I overheard Alexis cackling about it to her idiot girlfriends was just really nasty If I had to guess: jimmy is a philanderer anyway. Alexis is just making a game out of it for her own amusement. Kara either knows the deal and is just enjoying the free ride, or really thinks she loves him and doesn't know jimmy has no intention of leaving, or that Alexis is fully aware of everything and thinks its funny. I'm leaning towards believing that Kara must know- she just enjoys the sugar daddy setup. Why else would she be involved in this. Maybe I'm just over thinking it. The only person I really know is jimmy, because he is my customer. He is not a jerk or anything, he's just a guy with a lot of money who likes to sleep around and has a wife with an evil streak I guess.
So happy together Posted August 25, 2013 Posted August 25, 2013 There is a simple answer to this thread: It is none of your business what others are doing in their bedroom. It is THEIR private life. Butt out. 1
jlola Posted August 25, 2013 Posted August 25, 2013 Essentially, yeah I guess that sums it up. The married couple has more money than they know what to do with so the financial part is definitely not affecting them. The way I overheard Alexis cackling about it to her idiot girlfriends was just really nasty If I had to guess: jimmy is a philanderer anyway. Alexis is just making a game out of it for her own amusement. Kara either knows the deal and is just enjoying the free ride, or really thinks she loves him and doesn't know jimmy has no intention of leaving, or that Alexis is fully aware of everything and thinks its funny. I'm leaning towards believing that Kara must know- she just enjoys the sugar daddy setup. Why else would she be involved in this. Maybe I'm just over thinking it. The only person I really know is jimmy, because he is my customer. He is not a jerk or anything, he's just a guy with a lot of money who likes to sleep around and has a wife with an evil streak I guess. Perhaps the wife knowing he is a philanderer ,thinks she has control in allowing him to do as he wants, but including her. Sick. My mother always says(and this applies to everybody, not just AP) stay out of people's marriages. Because when you involve yourself, it will end badly. Because MP make up and then they turn against you! I have seen this happen too often not to see the truth in this. Whether it's a friends marriage,a sibling ,in-law or whoever. Stay out of their business. And if you feel you were "invited" by a member of the marriage to enter the relationship, you have every right to say refuse. This whole mess can be avoided if women and men avoided MP!!
HopingAgain Posted August 25, 2013 Posted August 25, 2013 BetterThanThis, run like the wind from these people! And if you still feel compelled to drop a tip to OW do so anonymously and in an ambigious manner so there are no professional repercussions for you. Another similar scenario that happens, and I know some couples who have done this, is that a husband or wife will go out and get a sugar mama or daddy with full knowledge and participation of the spouse. They trick OP into thinking they're in love an will leave the marriage for them, while going back sharing the money and perks with their spouse. There is often no honor among thieves when it comes down to the betrayal business. 1
AlwaysGrowing Posted August 25, 2013 Posted August 25, 2013 I don't understand where some see hypocrisy. Everyone...regardless of the alphabet soup label you have identified yourself with should have self respect. What I have an issue with...is all because another lives with none, does that mean we should? For me, everyone is responsible for their OWN actions. We can't point a finger at anyone else..and say "see...they have no morals ", and that in of itself gives us the RIGHT to act in exactly the same way. It doesn't. Our actions speak to our self respect. This also has been swirling in my head.... If the wife is a knowing accomplice ...is she really a bs? If there is no bs...is there really an ow?
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