FearingTEN Posted August 22, 2013 Posted August 22, 2013 I know that I shouldn't love my girlfriend anymore. But I do very much. No natter how much she hurt me, I can't get over her one bit. I love her so much. You may call me crazy, but I am so inlove with this woman despite her betrayal against me. Me & her were together for 2 and a half years. She began crushing on a another guy a year into it, which caused us to have alot of arguments. These arguments led to her breaking up with me and dating this other guy 2 weeks later. I know that what she did was wrong. But I also know that the woman I fell inlove with is still in there somewhere. I do not know if this is a rebound guy or not (considering that she said she loved him and got super committed with this guy a week into the relationship) , but I know for certain that I love this girl to death. Yea, I am VERY angry at what she did. At times when I feel like crying, I just begin to think about how much she betrayed me and that she lost a very loving boyfriend. But other times I remember the good times we had and how much I absolutly love and adore her. I know that I must move on. Wether she comes back or not, I must move on because its for the better and crying everyday won't do anything. Its been 2 months since our breakup & a month and a half since she went out with this guy. It kills me everyday from morning to night. Sometimes to the point of full on breaking out in tears almost everynight. She tells me how much she loves him and that I should leave her alone. Yesterday was the start of my no contact Yes, I would LOVE her back. But in this circumstances, I don't know if that is possible. And there really isn't anything else to do but to move on. If she comes back, then she comes back. But if she doesn't, I'm hoping that I have moved on already and forgot about her. My question is.. How can I cope with this. How can I somehow stop loving her ? Stop thinking about her? Stop being SOOO attracted to her? And most importantly, stop wanting her back? Anything will help. Thanks guys.
Faith13/2 Posted August 22, 2013 Posted August 22, 2013 I know that I shouldn't love my girlfriend anymore. But I do very much. No natter how much she hurt me, I can't get over her one bit. I love her so much. You may call me crazy, but I am so inlove with this woman despite her betrayal against me. Me & her were together for 2 and a half years. She began crushing on a another guy a year into it, which caused us to have alot of arguments. These arguments led to her breaking up with me and dating this other guy 2 weeks later. I know that what she did was wrong. But I also know that the woman I fell inlove with is still in there somewhere. I do not know if this is a rebound guy or not (considering that she said she loved him and got super committed with this guy a week into the relationship) , but I know for certain that I love this girl to death. Yea, I am VERY angry at what she did. At times when I feel like crying, I just begin to think about how much she betrayed me and that she lost a very loving boyfriend. But other times I remember the good times we had and how much I absolutly love and adore her. I know that I must move on. Wether she comes back or not, I must move on because its for the better and crying everyday won't do anything. Its been 2 months since our breakup & a month and a half since she went out with this guy. It kills me everyday from morning to night. Sometimes to the point of full on breaking out in tears almost everynight. She tells me how much she loves him and that I should leave her alone. Yesterday was the start of my no contact Yes, I would LOVE her back. But in this circumstances, I don't know if that is possible. And there really isn't anything else to do but to move on. If she comes back, then she comes back. But if she doesn't, I'm hoping that I have moved on already and forgot about her. My question is.. How can I cope with this. How can I somehow stop loving her ? Stop thinking about her? Stop being SOOO attracted to her? And most importantly, stop wanting her back? Anything will help. Thanks guys. I don't really feel there's an exact thing you can do. You love this girl, your feelings will be there regardless of what she's done to you. Your just going to have to stick to the no contact and let time work itself. Healing is a process and there's really nothing you can do to rush that process. Try to find somethings to occupy your time and get your mind off of her. Focus on you and less on her. You know you were loving towards her, so don't dwell on what she has lost, and what you have gained. 1
Sparkle304 Posted August 22, 2013 Posted August 22, 2013 I completely understand how painful it feels. Trust me, I know. You are going to hurt - both physically (yes, you can actually feel the pain in your heart and stomach) and emotionally. You need to cry. You need to vent your frustrations and sadness. But do it here on LS or with your friends and family. Please don't make contact, it will only make you hurt more. Now brace yourself........ In a few weeks, you will have to look at the facts: you are creating an illusion of what she is and what the two of you could have been. Remember that it is an ILLUSION, as in not reality. For whatever reason, she decided to move on. You need to respect that and make a promise to yourself that her decision will NOT prevent you from moving on with your life. If you don't do this, you've just given her the power to enjoy her new relationship AND destroy any future happiness you may have with someone else. WOW! That's a lot of power you've given to someone who not only hurt you, but who isn't even a part of your life anymore! Sorry if that was harsh. You will get through this. Give yourself time. Our society has pressured us into moving too fast. Take your time. You will feel pain for some weeks and months to come, but even if you try to fight it, change will occur. However, it's completely in your control to determine if this change will be for the better. You can control how you react and deal with her decision. You are not powerless! 2
skydiveaddict Posted August 22, 2013 Posted August 22, 2013 She tells me how much she loves him and that I should leave her alone. Take her advice and never speak to her again. 1
Vinsanity1307 Posted August 22, 2013 Posted August 22, 2013 Hey man I feel your pain...I was with a girl for 5 years a nd she picks up and leaves and a week later is talking to her scummy ex.....no contact is a must....I'm sure you were a good bf to her...and the next few months will be tough....go to the g ym..you feel so much better...trust me.....I'm almost 7 weeks post break up and 4.5 Weeks no contact abd still love the her abd want her but think of her as a bad drug and your the addict..and every time you contact your taking a hit of a bad drug....for your fix if you will...tell your self your not a drug addict your stronger than that...the emotion of the loss of your gf triggers the same part of your brain as an addict to drugs or alcohol....Just keep saying your better than an addict 1
Soat Posted August 22, 2013 Posted August 22, 2013 I know that I shouldn't love my girlfriend anymore. But I do very much. No natter how much she hurt me, I can't get over her one bit. I love her so much. You may call me crazy, but I am so inlove with this woman despite her betrayal against me. Me & her were together for 2 and a half years. She began crushing on a another guy a year into it, which caused us to have alot of arguments. These arguments led to her breaking up with me and dating this other guy 2 weeks later. I know that what she did was wrong. But I also know that the woman I fell inlove with is still in there somewhere. I do not know if this is a rebound guy or not (considering that she said she loved him and got super committed with this guy a week into the relationship) , but I know for certain that I love this girl to death. Yea, I am VERY angry at what she did. At times when I feel like crying, I just begin to think about how much she betrayed me and that she lost a very loving boyfriend. But other times I remember the good times we had and how much I absolutly love and adore her. I know that I must move on. Wether she comes back or not, I must move on because its for the better and crying everyday won't do anything. Its been 2 months since our breakup & a month and a half since she went out with this guy. It kills me everyday from morning to night. Sometimes to the point of full on breaking out in tears almost everynight. She tells me how much she loves him and that I should leave her alone. Yesterday was the start of my no contact Yes, I would LOVE her back. But in this circumstances, I don't know if that is possible. And there really isn't anything else to do but to move on. If she comes back, then she comes back. But if she doesn't, I'm hoping that I have moved on already and forgot about her. My question is.. How can I cope with this. How can I somehow stop loving her ? Stop thinking about her? Stop being SOOO attracted to her? And most importantly, stop wanting her back? Anything will help. Thanks guys. I think my guide will help: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/breaks-breaking-up/418580-my-7-step-guide-breakups
Onward_Upward Posted August 22, 2013 Posted August 22, 2013 ...you are creating an illusion of what she is and what the two of you could have been. Remember that it is an ILLUSION, as in not reality. For whatever reason, she decided to move on. You need to respect that and make a promise to yourself that her decision will NOT prevent you from moving on with your life. If you don't do this, you've just given her the power to enjoy her new relationship AND destroy any future happiness you may have with someone else. WOW! That's a lot of power you've given to someone who not only hurt you, but who isn't even a part of your life anymore! Pure Gold Sparkle ...
Coping Vortex Posted August 22, 2013 Posted August 22, 2013 I know that I shouldn't love my girlfriend anymore. But I do very much. No natter how much she hurt me, I can't get over her one bit. I love her so much. You may call me crazy, but I am so inlove with this woman despite her betrayal against me. Me & her were together for 2 and a half years. She began crushing on a another guy a year into it, which caused us to have alot of arguments. These arguments led to her breaking up with me and dating this other guy 2 weeks later. I know that what she did was wrong. But I also know that the woman I fell inlove with is still in there somewhere. I do not know if this is a rebound guy or not (considering that she said she loved him and got super committed with this guy a week into the relationship) , but I know for certain that I love this girl to death. Yea, I am VERY angry at what she did. At times when I feel like crying, I just begin to think about how much she betrayed me and that she lost a very loving boyfriend. But other times I remember the good times we had and how much I absolutly love and adore her. I know that I must move on. Wether she comes back or not, I must move on because its for the better and crying everyday won't do anything. Its been 2 months since our breakup & a month and a half since she went out with this guy. It kills me everyday from morning to night. Sometimes to the point of full on breaking out in tears almost everynight. She tells me how much she loves him and that I should leave her alone. Yesterday was the start of my no contact Yes, I would LOVE her back. But in this circumstances, I don't know if that is possible. And there really isn't anything else to do but to move on. If she comes back, then she comes back. But if she doesn't, I'm hoping that I have moved on already and forgot about her. My question is.. How can I cope with this. How can I somehow stop loving her ? Stop thinking about her? Stop being SOOO attracted to her? And most importantly, stop wanting her back? Anything will help. Thanks guys. Its been 9 months for me and it doesn't get any easier trust me. You have to start looking at things form other angles. For instance she may still have a place in her heart for you...BUT she no longer respects you. Once they lose that respect for you and give it to someone else, its over for good. Just think about that for a minute. Think about a time where you lost respect for someone. Try to see it through those eyes. She doesn't care about you, she won't talk to you, she doesn't care what you are doing she doesn't respect you anymore. Think about there was a time it was your calls she took, it was you she wanted to see it was you who she thought was the greatest guy in the world. That respect is gone.
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