DollWelch Posted August 20, 2013 Posted August 20, 2013 I happen to FB search an old crush recently, out of pure curiosity and the fact that I haven't thought of it until now. I don't know why I did it exactly, but I did. And when I did, I was pleasantly surprised to see he hasn't changed much other than grow old, if only a little. I haven't spoken to this person in at least 6 years, and I'm not sure how I feel about making contact. I noticed that he and I share a mutual friend, surprisingly however I didn't expect this person to be a mutual friend. I am thinking of sending him a message to see how he's doing at the very least, but something tells me I shouldn't. Perhaps it is best to leave people from the past in the past. What do you think?
New User Posted August 20, 2013 Posted August 20, 2013 Unless there's some negative baggage between you two, I don't see any big deal in dropping him a line. The thing that I like about FB is that it has given me the ability to do just that- I've reconnected with people I haven't been in touch with for up to twenty years. I'd just drop him a line and see where it goes.
white Posted August 20, 2013 Posted August 20, 2013 Generally it is best to leave it. Nothing's the same and they're a different person. However if you're armoured against any possible backlash (up to and including being told by them you're an insufferable ****, or even worse, that they were totally into you back then but hey, sorry, they're married with 3 kids now) then go ahead. Nothing to lose.
KungFuJoe Posted August 20, 2013 Posted August 20, 2013 Like New User mentioned, as long as there is nothing negative...go right ahead. I "reunited" by pure chance with a major crush I had on a girl back when I was in high school. Four years had gone by since the last time I saw her and I didn't even know her name back then (at least we never exchanged names...I just got it from looking in the yearbook). We're currently married. 1
Author DollWelch Posted August 21, 2013 Author Posted August 21, 2013 Unless there's some negative baggage between you two, I don't see any big deal in dropping him a line. There is -I mean, there was history between him and I, many years ago. This is particularly why I am hesitant to contact him. The gest of it is back when he and I were getting to know each other, he developed feelings for me. He admitted those feelings to me, and I rejected him. I was young back then. Some time passed, and I contacted him; he was thrilled to hear from me. But he had already moved on with someone else and claimed that he was serious about her. I took it as he had built a life for himself, and so I let go too. I thought he and I could at least remain friends. That couldn't be done. I suppose I may be just rehashing the past. I don't know. From his pictures (sans wedding band), he doesn't look married with three children. But I could be wrong of course. I "reunited" by pure chance with a major crush I had on a girl back when I was in high school. Four years had gone by since the last time I saw her and I didn't even know her name back then (at least we never exchanged names...I just got it from looking in the yearbook). We're currently married. Congrats to you two! But, that is a rarity. I can't say I know people who had the guts to do what you did. I highly doubt he'll want to hear from me again given the history. Perhaps I take refuge in reliving what could have been in my own mind.
KungFuJoe Posted August 21, 2013 Posted August 21, 2013 Congrats to you two! But, that is a rarity. I can't say I know people who had the guts to do what you did. I highly doubt he'll want to hear from me again given the history. Perhaps I take refuge in reliving what could have been in my own mind. Take a look at what I posted in the "How did you meet your SO" topic in the General Relationship forum (at least I think that's where it was). What I didn't say in that topic was after I did end up bumping into her that fateful day at the gym...we ended up going out later that night (with a bunch of friends) and ended up having sex in my car that same night. She wanted to be with me, but I wasn't ready to leave my gf and I was pretty confused with it all having never been unfaithful before in my life. I didn't end up with her...she understood (obviously me having a gf was a pretty damn good excuse) but she had some pretty hard feelings for me and eventually, she wanted NOTHING to do with me. We kept in touch through a mutual friend but we were never friends and eventually, it degraded to a point where if she knew I was going to be someplace she would avoid being there herself. We didn't finally get together until three MORE years later...ANOTHER fateful night when my friend tricked her into going out with me (by not mentioning that I would be there). Once again, one thing led to another, we ended up having sex AGAIN that same night...and here we are today. So I say, you got nothing to lose...if it's meant to be, it will be.
ja123 Posted August 21, 2013 Posted August 21, 2013 Drop him a line!!!! You'll always be wondering "what if", otherwise.
Author DollWelch Posted August 21, 2013 Author Posted August 21, 2013 So I say, you got nothing to lose...if it's meant to be, it will be. Drop him a line!!!! You'll always be wondering "what if", otherwise. That is a wild romantic story KungFuJoe. I don't think mine can top that! I did it! I have been thinking about contacting him lately, taking into consideration what everyone said, and I finally did it. Now it is just a matter of time before he responds, if ever. You're right. Now I can't say I never made an attempt to contact him. I did, and whatever happens from here on out, I'm perfectly okay with it.
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