forgetmenot75 Posted August 23, 2013 Posted August 23, 2013 Haha you are just so sweet but I doubts he changed his schedule for you. I'm sorry to say this, but even in the case he's extremely shy, he should gave started some conversation if he was interested. You seem to created an imaginary world, and reality is different. You know nothing about him, he might has a girlfriend, or wife, who knows! Don't continue with this imaginary thing, it's preventing you from having real relationships with real men. 1
Author Ciel0 Posted August 23, 2013 Author Posted August 23, 2013 (edited) @Stefanie I've caused myself a lot stress thinking about all the "what ifs" . It often seems to be so different than what I expected! Thank you so much for your advice and I hope everything works out for you! Oh, thought I should mention that I get an odd vibe from some of his coworkers... It's hard to describe, it's almost like they're thinking "Oh, it's her.". The guy I like gives of some pretty mixed signals: some days he's sweet, other days he seems avoidant. I admit I've acted this way too though, I can barely glance at him sometimes because I feel so nervous. (The last time I saw him I hardly even looked at him....I felt guilty, like I was being rude ) Edited August 23, 2013 by Ciel0
Author Ciel0 Posted August 25, 2013 Author Posted August 25, 2013 I wanted to add that I would be ecstatic to simply be his friend (that's how I wanted it to start off anyway), since I know the day will come when he will be gone and I would be hurt. I just don't know how to be more forward without him suspecting romantic intentions. .
Stefanie Posted August 25, 2013 Posted August 25, 2013 History has shown me that it's impossible to simply be friends once you've been seriously romantically interested in someone. You'll always view them as a potential partner. That aside, I'm sorry if it feels like you're getting negative reactions from other cafe staff. At this point, I think things aren't looking too great. But it seems like you're young, so I can assure you there are plenty of chances to meet people you're just as attracted to. In the meantime, I suggest you just put yourself out there and meet heaps of people. Male or female, it helps you gain communication skills and makes you less nervous when you do meet a guy you're really attracted to. Also, don't be afraid of just making the first move. These days, some guys really admire a girl for initiating contact or flirtation. I was the first to talk to that guy I spoke about earlier and I think I threw him with my confidence and made him curious. Part of building that confidence is not fearing rejection and the only way I've learned to not fear it, is to get it. A lot. Think of it this way: if you make a move and he responds well, good for you. If he doesn't, his loss. If you don't make a move at all, you'll never know and regret it anyway. So, don't narrow yourself down to one guy just yet. You've got a lot of lovin' ahead of you. 1
theonlyjuan Posted August 25, 2013 Posted August 25, 2013 Well I am a guy and a complete flirt but it comes naturally, for some reason. I have a story that will help you, kinda lol. Because of my crazy fitness diets I get low sugar levels, so my hands shake a bit. I was chatting to this girl I used to like and she asked me to hold her phone while she put her jacket on, she noticed that my hands were shaking. She said " Why are you shaking " I said in a jokey/flirty way " It's because I like you and you make me nervous " It was a lie but she found it funny and had the idea that I liked her planted in her brain. She wasn't 100% sure I liked her but it defiantly made her think I did. Eventually one day she asked me if I did like her I don't know if this thread has moved on from your original question, I couldn't be arsed to read it all. If you are still stuck on your original question just have fun with it, like I did. Treat things with a bit of humor and you will be surprised how easy they are. 1
Author Ciel0 Posted August 25, 2013 Author Posted August 25, 2013 (edited) The negative reactions could simply be imagined, I do have the tendency to over think things. I get vibes that one of his coworkers likes me, however, I think he charged the full price for drink that was supposed to be cheaper that day . I suppose this will never go anywhere if I don't get bolder. I thought of saying "Hey, nice to see you." real impromptu . @theonlyjuan, That's a great idea! If he ever asks I may do that (if I'm brave enough ) Edited August 25, 2013 by Ciel0
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