mcfcjay Posted August 20, 2013 Posted August 20, 2013 Okay, so me and my ex were together for 3 years, we broke up for 4 months or so during that 3 years and got back together, she done nothing sexual with any other lads just kissed a few and i was okay with that. Now we have been split up for 2-3 months, first few weeks basically still together, still meeting sleeping together etc then alot of stuff went on and her mum started hating me, she changed her number and blocked me on facebook and went completely cold on me. I wasnt to fussed at the time, but then i found out she was meeting someone else, i spoke to her recently on a friends fbook and we started speaking eventually she agreed to meet me as im soon going to afghan and we probably wouldnt ever see each other again as she planned on working abroad next year. We met up, everything was great we had a laugh had a drink then both went to see our seperate friends, we agreed to meet up later that night, by this time i still didnt have her new number as she always refused to give it me, but she text me that night and we met up in town both drunk and it was like we was the perfect couple again, we ended up going home together and having the most amazing sex and she said it was the best shes ever had and you could tell that it was!! We had a talk about our relationship and she even ended up crying! But i think it was due to the alcohol surely? Anyway she went home the next day and so did i, i texted her a few times and got one word answers and she went completely cold again!! The other night she told me she liked the guy she was meeting more than me, shes meeting him this weekend i begged her not to but she is doing it anyway, im heartbroken!! I know she would never ever admit if she has feelings for me as she is incredibly stubborn!! Is there any chance of me getting her back?
Author mcfcjay Posted August 20, 2013 Author Posted August 20, 2013 Any suggestions on what i should do????
LostOne1 Posted August 20, 2013 Posted August 20, 2013 Move on dude... I was in your spot a year ago and I feel so stupid chasing after a girl... A GIRL!... there are over a billion women on earth! Going after one is not worth messing up your life, mind etc... She doesn't want you dude... let her go and stop chasing her. How would you feel if some girl was bothering you all the time and you didn't like her at all? You'd get annoyed and that is what you're doing now. Just go no contact and don't talk to her at all. No text, calls etc.. Act like she died and you cannot talk to her. If she contacts you avoid it. She has moved on and the faster you let go the faster you will heal. I'm at 1 year with my BU and I'm super good and happy now. So there is hope mate, but it isn't with this girl. Trust me when you get back on the dating scene in 8 or so months. It will feel better to know you can find someone who won't leave you and will love you for you. So let her go and move on as hard as it sounds and is to do. But do it man, this is coming from a guy who went through almost the same thing you did.. Don't mess up like me.. learn from me. Just move on and take life as a new adventure now without her. This is the time you'll learn to love yourself a lot more trust me on it! 3
Author mcfcjay Posted August 20, 2013 Author Posted August 20, 2013 Worst part is i ended it, she tells me she was in bits when i ended it but somehow i cant see it if she moved on this quick!! Do you think she will come back in a few months or so trying to contact me? By then id hopefully be over her fully and be able to just ignore her man love is cruel! Wish i could reverse a couple of months and stop myself from ****ing it up! Why would she meet up with me and act so in love again if she isnt even interested thats what i dont get if a girl i didnt care about was bothering me i wouldnt meet up with them let alone sleep with them and cuddle all night and act madly in love :S:S shes ****ed my head right up!
Author mcfcjay Posted August 20, 2013 Author Posted August 20, 2013 Any women with a insight as to why she would do this!! I was the second person shes ever been with, took her months to become sexually active with me!
barky2 Posted August 20, 2013 Posted August 20, 2013 Do me a big favor....take a damn breath. Did you? OK now read on. None of us knows if she's coming back. Nor do you. You cannot make her. Nothing you do will make her. If you somehow conive her back, shell leave again. Go strict NC and get you damn mind right for a little while. She doesn't need space....YOU DO. Chasing a girl is cute in the beginning....after a breakup its a big turn off. Any woman would agree. Just chill. Let her be. But don't sit there on your thumbs....the world is a beautiful place when you open your eyes and stop living for someone else. Barky 2
Author mcfcjay Posted August 20, 2013 Author Posted August 20, 2013 I cant help it man all that runs through my head is her meeting this other guy!! If only i knew wether she still felt anything for me whatsoever :*(
barky2 Posted August 20, 2013 Posted August 20, 2013 If your focused on if she's meeting other people, than your not focused on yourself. I heard that once, and once you take a step back.....you realise the truth behind it. I had to deal with my ex having a bf. When I changed focus, it didn't bother me. Sure I loved her. But I need to FIX me and what was wrong with me so WHEN she did come back, I was in the best position. If she came to your door step and saw you right now dude, shed be turned off...if you were happy and experiencing life and doing you..its attractive to women. Think about what attracted her to you...get that guy back...while your MAINTAINING NO CONTACT PERIOD NO EXCEPTIONS. You'll be fine, I promise dude. Barky 1
Author mcfcjay Posted August 20, 2013 Author Posted August 20, 2013 Worst part is i go afghan for 7 months, she would have been the person i would have wanted to talk to all the time!! But during the relationship she treated me like crap!! We split up once and got back together after 5 months, but during that time she met another guy, when we got back together around 2 month in i found out she had been texting him and had him saved under a girls name on her phone!! Theres a couple other incidents along the same lines, she swears shes never cheated, im the second person shes ever bin with and it took me 3 months to even get sexually active with her as she wanted to wait! I smash myself in the gym every day, thinking of her seems to help me thrash myself in the gym more, im never in the area she lives in as like i say ill be off to afghan and unless she spies on my fbook she will never see what im up to, although ATM she has me blocked, and if she unblocked me id block her as it would kill me to see a picture of her with another man!! Cheers for the sound advice, NC starts now, as weve been talking the past coupleof days, shes still a bit distant.
barky2 Posted August 20, 2013 Posted August 20, 2013 Worst part is i go afghan for 7 months, she would have been the person i would have wanted to talk to all the time!! But during the relationship she treated me like crap!! We split up once and got back together after 5 months, but during that time she met another guy, when we got back together around 2 month in i found out she had been texting him and had him saved under a girls name on her phone!! Theres a couple other incidents along the same lines, she swears shes never cheated, im the second person shes ever bin with and it took me 3 months to even get sexually active with her as she wanted to wait! I smash myself in the gym every day, thinking of her seems to help me thrash myself in the gym more, im never in the area she lives in as like i say ill be off to afghan and unless she spies on my fbook she will never see what im up to, although ATM she has me blocked, and if she unblocked me id block her as it would kill me to see a picture of her with another man!! Cheers for the sound advice, NC starts now, as weve been talking the past coupleof days, shes still a bit distant. Cut contact now ....r u serious? Your going to Afghan I'm guessing in the military? You want this girl to be on your mind while your getting shot at? You need to go NC 100% INDEFINITELY until you arrive back home. Dude. Stop and think. You don't want to be over there and have her in the back of your mind. Good friend of mines wife left him for a Jody...he was stationed over there for another 2 years while he had to witness her being with someone else. Not paying attention IED blew up and got shrapnel in his arm....true story. Get your damb mind right and leave this girl in the dark before you go man...this girls no good and will never commit to a relationship long term with you. Re read your post...its month this month that. You deserve better. Barky
Author mcfcjay Posted August 20, 2013 Author Posted August 20, 2013 yeah i go in october, and im only home one more time for two weeks, making it nearly impossible to gether back anyway, your right i should forget about her, its hard as **** but it has to be done, ive always wanted to learn the guitar, and i have one sitting in my room, i suppose nows the time to begin the bettering myself period with gym, tan, and learning the guitar. I think she will regret not giving me a second chance when im back, as ill be back tanned, muscly and loaded, all of which she wont get to enjoy i think she will probably try get in touch with me then but im not going to think about it. What did you do when you thought about contacting your ex during NC? Its whenever im not doing anything that i think about her!! I was meeting and sleeping with another girl for a few weeks which made me forget about my ex, but i knew it was nothing serious. Im just after a good looking girl i can talk to whilst im out there to be honest!!
barky2 Posted August 20, 2013 Posted August 20, 2013 yeah i go in october, and im only home one more time for two weeks, making it nearly impossible to gether back anyway, your right i should forget about her, its hard as **** but it has to be done, ive always wanted to learn the guitar, and i have one sitting in my room, i suppose nows the time to begin the bettering myself period with gym, tan, and learning the guitar. I think she will regret not giving me a second chance when im back, as ill be back tanned, muscly and loaded, all of which she wont get to enjoy i think she will probably try get in touch with me then but im not going to think about it. What did you do when you thought about contacting your ex during NC? Its whenever im not doing anything that i think about her!! I was meeting and sleeping with another girl for a few weeks which made me forget about my ex, but i knew it was nothing serious. Im just after a good looking girl i can talk to whilst im out there to be honest!
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