lolakm Posted August 19, 2013 Posted August 19, 2013 So this guy and I have been hanging out for a while. He has taken me out to dinner, movies and stuff. *A few weeks ago he told me that he wasnt sure what it is that we had and I said me either and he kissed me. We are going to be hanging out again this week, but how do I prevent this from turning into a friends with benefits deal? I dont want him to see me as just some easy girl. But I also dont want to be like, hey be in a relationship with me, or be committed, bc im sure it might scare him away lol. So any suggestions on what I should/shouldn't dobor say? Thanks!!!*
Author lolakm Posted August 19, 2013 Author Posted August 19, 2013 I do like this guy a lot. And I love that ive been able to hug and kiss him. I just dont want to turn this friendship into a friends with benefits...I want it to turn into a relationship. But now that I kissed him before he's my boyfriend, I don't know how to get from point a to point b-point b being in a relationship. Hopefully that makes more sense
KatZee Posted August 19, 2013 Posted August 19, 2013 You don't say anything. Just keep it cool. Go hang out with him, but keep it OUTSIDE either of your houses. Go out on a date. Dinner, mini golf... something fun. You've already kissed him, I'm sure you don't regret it, so say nothing. To start being all, "omg am I a FWB now? What is this?" only makes you look insecure. You kissed him. Big deal. Keep going out with him, show him a good time, show him you're interested and it should naturally progress from there and him initiating any "talk."
Author lolakm Posted August 19, 2013 Author Posted August 19, 2013 Thank you! What you say makes sense, but im afraid ive made mistake lol the thing is...he asked me to hang out but at his apartment. He said he was going to cook dinner for me. And I said yes. :l What to do now? We have been seing each other for over a year, going out to dinners, movies and all that...so I didnt think dinner at his place would be a bad idea. Geez, do I just suck at dating? lol
Author lolakm Posted August 19, 2013 Author Posted August 19, 2013 How old are you? Kissing should not turn it into fwb...sex and fooling around does...not saying that you cant have sex and fool around prior BUT make sure you know where its going first. Im 23 hes 24. Ive only been in one serious relationship that was like 4 years...so im not good or experienced with dating lol
Author lolakm Posted August 19, 2013 Author Posted August 19, 2013 Jeez you are a year older than me lol...and i read your above statement...youve been seeing eachother for a year?! Im sorry you are definitely fwb....i would have the talk ASAP you should have had that a while ago... LOL! Well this whole time that we have been seeing each other we had never kissed! He hadnt even told me he liked me. We kissed for the first time about 3 weeks ago. It took him a good 6 months to even hug me...So its not like we have been making out this whole year that we've been hanging out. Haha
KatZee Posted August 19, 2013 Posted August 19, 2013 Thank you! What you say makes sense, but im afraid ive made mistake lol the thing is...he asked me to hang out but at his apartment. He said he was going to cook dinner for me. And I said yes. :l What to do now? We have been seing each other for over a year, going out to dinners, movies and all that...so I didnt think dinner at his place would be a bad idea. Geez, do I just suck at dating? lol Wait, WHAT? Were you guys dating? Or was it purely platonic? Maybe this is his way of stepping it up and showing interest.
Author lolakm Posted August 19, 2013 Author Posted August 19, 2013 Wait, WHAT? Were you guys dating? Or was it purely platonic? Maybe this is his way of stepping it up and showing interest. Im not sure what you would call it lol. We both new we liked each other, he had just never made a move on me...and so I wasnt going to be the one to do it. We never called it dates..we called it hanging out, even tho they were pretty much dates. And so now that he got the courage to kiss me...I dont want to blow my chances of him being my boyfriend just bc I kiss him without him being my boyfriend first. Because next time I see him, im pretty sure im gonna want to kiss him lol. After waitjng for so long for him to make a move...I want him. Hahaha I dont want to seem easy. So how should i go about telling him that? Or should I just not say anything at all, just not have sex with him?
Author lolakm Posted August 19, 2013 Author Posted August 19, 2013 Okay *phew* lol well in that case just carry on where you are, but after hanging out for so long you should be comfortable enough to ask him where he is going with this But how do I go about it without sounding needy??
Author lolakm Posted August 19, 2013 Author Posted August 19, 2013 Ah ok. Its scary to be that upfront about it. But I wi try it when I see him.
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