StanMusial Posted August 20, 2013 Posted August 20, 2013 I don't think its that easy for girls to find a decent guy on there either. Most girls I've known who have used it, it never worked out for them and they stayed single for a long time. I don't think it works for anyone really. I only know of one person who it has worked for out of many. Male or Female. It's not that popular where I live. I have a couple of buddies that tried it and I tried it. It's really hard to get any girls to respond. I have another female friend that tried it and she ran through guys like water. She was frustrated because she couldn't catch a bf and I told her to stop sleeping with these guys. That didn't go over too well LOL but a few months later she started talking to me again.
henderson14 Posted August 20, 2013 Posted August 20, 2013 (edited) And another thing. Your probably saving yourself time and effort anyways because every time I've met a girl it almost never goes to a second date. Most of the time there is no connection and I don't call them again. Then the few times I do feel something they won't call me back. While I'm typing this I'm waiting for a call back from the first girl I've met off OLD that I liked for a long time, while I'm having second thoughts about meeting a girl tomorrow. I feel like I'm not going to like her already. Its all pointless in the end. Edited August 20, 2013 by henderson14
TB Rhine Posted August 20, 2013 Posted August 20, 2013 Most girls' interests consist primarily of "shopping, traveling," and myriad other stuff they're looking for a guy to pay for. To the lady who talks about getting interest from younger guys irl as opposed to online - it's because online, they can see your age. For the most part women over 30 are invisible to men under 45, just as men under 30 are invisible to women 20-29 or so. All people care about online are your pics, and to some extent (in some cases) whether or not you flatter them. I've messaged a lot of women based on mutual interest - asking if they've read the latest book by an author we both like, such like that - and it rarely leads to a first reply, almost never to a second (lesson: dating isn't the TWoP message boards, guys). On the other hand, if I just message and say "You're cute - kudos," or something to that effect, my numbers improve somewhat. Finally, there are two kinds of chicks (for the most part) on OkC. One is chicks 18-25, cute, smiley and perky, usually in college or something like that. They're looking for a cute guy about their age to have fun with, and they are prime real estate, and get 5,ooo messages a day. Then you have the 28 yr olds and up, who have at least 3 kids, aren't nearly as attractive (or fertile) as their younger brethren, yet expect (and boy, will they tell you) a man who is: A) Stable and well established in his career, to pay for all that shopping and traveling they dream of doing; B) Will love her kids unconditionally, as they are HER WORLD, and they are A PACKAGE DEAL (in other words, prepare to put them through college); and finally C) Better not be looking to hook up, 'cause she isn't into that ****e. So, you know, pretty much forget about having sex with her, at least after the wedding night.
fortyninethousand322 Posted August 20, 2013 Posted August 20, 2013 To the extent that I've had success doing online dating (which I really haven't had much), it's been on Okcupid, not Plenty of Fish. On POF, I have had 3 women reply to my messages in 3+ years I've been on there. Some disappeared after I asked to meet up. Most of the time though, women don't reply at all. They don't reply much on Okcupid either, but at least the reply rate was higher than on POF.
MrTurk Posted August 20, 2013 Posted August 20, 2013 Women dont even LOOK at my profile on OLD. When I joined a site in the past....I purposely made my profile, and did nothing after that....I didnt look at anyones profile, I didnt email anyone, didnt do a thing for a whole month. Not 1 woman had viewed my profile in that entire time. So I then emailed a few local women....and boom- all of a sudden, every woman I emailed, showed up as viewing my profile. I asked some women about it.....and I got the response "making my profile was enough work on my part" It is totally illogical on behalf of women like that, to think that way. Why in the F*ck would you exclude yourself to only the men that email you??? Thats what I will never understand with women that refuse to approach guys in public. They are diminishing their chances at finding a good guy, or at least the type of guy they like/desire and instead only choosing from the small percentage of men that approach her. But most women would rather weed through idiots for years.....than ever, ever, ever approaching a man and risking rejection. .
henderson14 Posted August 20, 2013 Posted August 20, 2013 Women dont even LOOK at my profile on OLD. When I joined a site in the past....I purposely made my profile, and did nothing after that....I didnt look at anyones profile, I didnt email anyone, didnt do a thing for a whole month. Not 1 woman had viewed my profile in that entire time. So I then emailed a few local women....and boom- all of a sudden, every woman I emailed, showed up as viewing my profile. I asked some women about it.....and I got the response "making my profile was enough work on my part" It is totally illogical on behalf of women like that, to think that way. Why in the F*ck would you exclude yourself to only the men that email you??? Thats what I will never understand with women that refuse to approach guys in public. They are diminishing their chances at finding a good guy, or at least the type of guy they like/desire and instead only choosing from the small percentage of men that approach her. But most women would rather weed through idiots for years.....than ever, ever, ever approaching a man and risking rejection. . Because the more active you are the more you show up in the feed. Sometimes when I make changes I will get messages all at once.
MrTurk Posted August 20, 2013 Posted August 20, 2013 Because the more active you are the more you show up in the feed. Sometimes when I make changes I will get messages all at once. It has nothing to do with being active. The women simply DO NOT BROWSE profiles.....they look at the guys that email them...PERIOD.
salparadise Posted August 20, 2013 Posted August 20, 2013 Ok, I'm convinced. I'm deleting my profile and letting the lovelies know that I won't be dating them because the men on LS say it's futile!
MidwestUSA Posted August 20, 2013 Posted August 20, 2013 Ok, I'm convinced. I'm deleting my profile and letting the lovelies know that I won't be dating them because the men on LS say it's futile! And I was just gonna ask what site and what's your handle? Heavy sigh. 1
sillyanswer Posted August 20, 2013 Posted August 20, 2013 It has nothing to do with being active. The women simply DO NOT BROWSE profiles.....they look at the guys that email them...PERIOD. Perhaps you need to reconsider your photo choices. 1
MidwestUSA Posted August 20, 2013 Posted August 20, 2013 Not sure if anyone has mentioned that POF is not a high quality site. Even having to pay a minimum to join match is a slight upgrade. I found POF to be full of guys (assuming women too) just looking for hookups or mind games. My two cents. 1
MrTurk Posted August 20, 2013 Posted August 20, 2013 Perhaps you need to reconsider your photo choices. Wrong. I've had plenty of women check my profile, my photos, and everything else. I'm not the problem, it's the stuck up mentality of women in my immediate area. Even a friend of mine that is very attractive, the pinnicle of tall dark and handsome, athletic, etc…. Even he says the women in our area are f'd up. He used to date women out of the area…and they would literally throw themselves at him. But the women around here act like none of us are good enough.
clia Posted August 20, 2013 Posted August 20, 2013 Is it just me or do you find anything sick about this? I mean, I scroll down tge page and as long as they are somewhat attractive, I will click on their profile. But then I READ it in order to decide whether or not to send a message. The girls that go by pictures alone seem like shallow morons. So you are allowed to weed out women based on their level of attractiveness (without reading their profile and scrolling) but women who do the same are "shallow morons"? Why are you allowed to filter yet the women you contact aren't? Don't you see how hypocritical that is? How many unattractive women with great profiles did you message?
Author 365daysgone Posted August 20, 2013 Author Posted August 20, 2013 So you are allowed to weed out women based on their level of attractiveness (without reading their profile and scrolling) but women who do the same are "shallow morons"? Why are you allowed to filter yet the women you contact aren't? Don't you see how hypocritical that is? How many unattractive women with great profiles did you message? Did you read what I said? I said if they are somewhat attractive, I click them an read their profile. Anyone that goes solely by looks and thinks "well, he is ok, but not great" and doesn't bother reading the profile are shallow. 1
clia Posted August 20, 2013 Posted August 20, 2013 Did you read what I said? I said if they are somewhat attractive, I click them an read their profile. Anyone that goes solely by looks and thinks "well, he is ok, but not great" and doesn't bother reading the profile are shallow. I read exactly what you said, and you restated it above. You expect the women to be at least "somewhat attractive" before you will even read their profile. That's the same thing you are accusing women of doing if they weed you out solely based on looks. You are doing the same thing in your original filter to decide who you might want to contact. The only difference is that they are scrolling through messages to do their weeding and you are scrolling through search results. For the record, I have no problem with people weeding based on looks. I just don't think you have any right to accuse women of being shallow morons when you are doing the exact same thing. 4
sillyanswer Posted August 20, 2013 Posted August 20, 2013 Wrong. I've had plenty of women check my profile, my photos, and everything else. I'm not the problem, it's the stuck up mentality of women in my immediate area. But you said that women don't browse. Now you're saying they do. Make up your mind!
Mascara Posted August 20, 2013 Posted August 20, 2013 I read exactly what you said, and you restated it above. You expect the women to be at least "somewhat attractive" before you will even read their profile. That's the same thing you are accusing women of doing if they weed you out solely based on looks. You are doing the same thing in your original filter to decide who you might want to contact. The only difference is that they are scrolling through messages to do their weeding and you are scrolling through search results. For the record, I have no problem with people weeding based on looks. I just don't think you have any right to accuse women of being shallow morons when you are doing the exact same thing. Exactly. Maybe they don't find you "somewhat attractive", so why are they obligated to consider you? Because you find THEM attractive?
Author 365daysgone Posted August 20, 2013 Author Posted August 20, 2013 I read exactly what you said, and you restated it above. You expect the women to be at least "somewhat attractive" before you will even read their profile. That's the same thing you are accusing women of doing if they weed you out solely based on looks. You are doing the same thing in your original filter to decide who you might want to contact. The only difference is that they are scrolling through messages to do their weeding and you are scrolling through search results. For the record, I have no problem with people weeding based on looks. I just don't think you have any right to accuse women of being shallow morons when you are doing the exact same thing. We could do this all day but if you are not going to read what I am sayin then forget it. SOLEY based on looks is shallow. I care far more about personality then looks. If you go solely by looks and do not read the about me section then you are shallow. Last time I am sayin it.
BradJacobs Posted August 20, 2013 Posted August 20, 2013 Use it to find flings and casual sex. Stop looking for a girlfriend online.
henderson14 Posted August 20, 2013 Posted August 20, 2013 It has nothing to do with being active. The women simply DO NOT BROWSE profiles.....they look at the guys that email them...PERIOD. Well I have women message me. I've had about 10 in the last month. Of course I live in Chicago where there are more people on the site. I'm sure most of them message me because I'm pretty tall because a lot of the girls are taller. I also don't have lame pictures with me alone or with my shirt off or in front of a mirror. I'm actually doing something or with friends or something. But like I said, even if you did get their numbers they might flake. Then the ones that don't flake there will just be no chemistry or she will be nothing like you thought. Your not missing anything.
henderson14 Posted August 20, 2013 Posted August 20, 2013 I read exactly what you said, and you restated it above. You expect the women to be at least "somewhat attractive" before you will even read their profile. That's the same thing you are accusing women of doing if they weed you out solely based on looks. You are doing the same thing in your original filter to decide who you might want to contact. The only difference is that they are scrolling through messages to do their weeding and you are scrolling through search results. For the record, I have no problem with people weeding based on looks. I just don't think you have any right to accuse women of being shallow morons when you are doing the exact same thing. I don't get the confusion. He said he has a minimum standard for looks like most people do. Maybe they have to be average looking, but there are also other things he probably looks at. He is saying that it is shallow to pick people only based on if they are the most attractive and not look at any other things and weighing those with it. And there is no way women choose only on looks. Thats something guys do. Women look at job, education, height and then maybe looks. If the guy is a doctor they are going to give him a lot more leeway on looks.
Author 365daysgone Posted August 20, 2013 Author Posted August 20, 2013 I don't get the confusion. He said he has a minimum standard for looks like most people do. Maybe they have to be average looking, but there are also other things he probably looks at. He is saying that it is shallow to pick people only based on if they are the most attractive and not look at any other things and weighing those with it. And there is no way women choose only on looks. Thats something guys do. Women look at job, education, height and then maybe looks. If the guy is a doctor they are going to give him a lot more leeway on looks. I don't think that's true about looks being least important to girls. They are openly very specific with what they want to see in a picture. No shirtless pics (which I can understand), but also, pictures where you are active, you have to be smiling, no beers in the picture, good quality, etc. These are things GIRLS have admitted on various forums that I have seen.
New User Posted August 21, 2013 Posted August 21, 2013 One thing that always seems pretty striking about these threads is how differently people perceive the entire OLD experience. Some of y'all seem to bleed anger towards the opposite sex here, and I can't help but suspect that anger comes through in your OLD experiences too. I can definitely say that most of the negativity towards OLD I've seen in this and other threads hasn't been my experience at all with it. When I'm active on it I have women message me first fairly frequently. My profile indicates I'm a blue collar guy and in my main picture you can't even see my face. I probably break just about every rule out there with the rest of my profile and pictures, but I still haven't had this horribly negative experience that many of you talk of. Sure- I've met a few duds and no, I haven't met anyone for a serious relationship off of it. I have expanded my social circle, had some fun and met some cool gals I otherwise wouldn't have. I'm guessing that the one advantage I have is that my profile- by pretty much all accounts- is unique (or at least unusual). If a bald construction worker in his mid 40s is getting more responses to his profile from (attractive) women than you are, chances are that you are doing something very wrong. I can promise you that none of the gals that either contacted me first or responded positively when I contacted them would have described me had you asked them what they were looking for. Contrary to what some of y'all wrote here, they read my profile and thought it was funny. Hope that those of you that are having problems figure something out- or just get off of it if you're worried about it being destructive to your very soul or any nonsense like that.
MrTurk Posted August 21, 2013 Posted August 21, 2013 Wrong. I've had plenty of women check my profile, my photos, and everything else. I'm not the problem, it's the stuck up mentality of women in my immediate area. But you said that women don't browse. Now you're saying they do. Make up your mind! Allow me to explain....local women never look at my profile. But I had plenty of women that live outside my area....look at my profile at my request....to give me advice and opinions.
white Posted August 21, 2013 Posted August 21, 2013 words What site do you use? Why's your profile so funny? Do you live in an urban US area or anywhere else in the world? What exactly is the wrong thing we poor benighted imbeciles might be doing? You need to put your money where your mouth is and give specifics if you don't want to come off as antagonistic. If it's always so striking how different your experience is, maybe you should pay it forward and enlighten everyone.
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