kgregory922 Posted August 19, 2013 Posted August 19, 2013 Where to begin .. I have a lot going on in life at the moment... My husband is going through something. He has had a rough life... abandoned by mother at a young age, Air Force ER medic, war, Oklahoma bombing, he was married for 19 yrs to a bi polar woman with a god complex. He has many demons, every so often it all comes to a head and he becomes cold, emotionless, Jekyll and hyde behavior, wants to be alone, wants to run, starts lying and being deceptive.. I don't know who this man is. My husband, the man I love is loving, warm and funny, he is my best friend and we have a blast when were together.. I miss all this. I have a 14 yr old autistic daughter from a previous marriage. We have both been through a lot with her and it has been very stressful. She hates him, doesn't want him around, doesn't want to share me. She becomes compulsive and consumed with wanting to get "rid of him" .. we are in the process of finding placement for her so that she can grow and mature. Her obsessive relationship with me is exhausting and im tired... I have no family, neither does my husband, we have no help. (please do not judge or criticize my decision for placement, please do not say I am choosing my husband over my daughter, that is not what this is about ..No one has walked in my shoes) her official diagnosis is Autism, ODD, PDD-NOS, OCD, Anxiety, Sensory stim, MR and seizure activity. Anyways ... My exH is not involved in her life. My husband has 2 children from previous marriage, they are older and live in Utah, we are in Florida. Hes having a meltdown, an emotional something .. maybe a crisis, I don't know ... Just need someone to talk to
Faith13/2 Posted August 19, 2013 Posted August 19, 2013 Seems like you have quite a lot going on all at once, I can relate. Times get stressful and it's always good to have someone to vent to. Don't worry I have no judgement to be passed I have also heard the "choosing a man over your kid" lecture before. Everyone has a reason for their choices whether people choose to understand that from your position or not, is another thing.
Author kgregory922 Posted August 20, 2013 Author Posted August 20, 2013 Thank you I am just so hurt and confused.. I feel like my life is falling apart and I am so scared. I try to stay strong when he's around, I don't want him to see me crying all the time .. its just so hard to keep everything in, his words and actions are so cold, he is distant.. I just keep asking myself .. Why me? What the hell did I do to deserve all this? How come it has to turn to ****? I am a good person with a huge heart, I don't want to keep hurting, I am so tired of crying..
Faith13/2 Posted August 20, 2013 Posted August 20, 2013 And you shouldn't have to. Sometimes (at least for me) all I want is for my SO to just hear me out with some consideration. It's like some people just don't understand that sometimes we just need an ear to listen, even if they don't have an answer to what's being said. I couldn't imagine being in a situation with a "disabled" child(sorry if that's not the correct term you would use) and feeling as if I had no one to speak to or understand. Sadly someone can only seem strong for so long til they do crumble, especially if they are carrying the burdens of many, and not just their own.
imtooconfused Posted August 27, 2013 Posted August 27, 2013 I am just so hurt and confused.. I feel like my life is falling apart and I am so scared. Your husband needs professional help, but more importantly you need professional help, independently. Can you go to the VA? If you work, perhaps there is an Employee Assistance program? Getting help from an on-line forum is good, but it sounds like your situation has more complications than most people on this site have experienced.
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