dnyfk33 Posted August 19, 2013 Posted August 19, 2013 I met a guy on an online dating website. I've been chatting with him through email. And I just wanted to know if you guys thought he was interested, based on the situation, and if so in what? Friends? FWB? Relationship? Details: He responds to my emails frequently, usually within a couple hours, and with great detail. I tend to discuss multiple points in one message and he'll take the time to make sure he addresses all of it. Now he lives one state away, but he's going to be moving to my area. He suggested that we hang out after he moves and gets settled. I told him it sounded like a good idea. But after I said that, I noticed that I am the one who's mostly asking questions about him. He did ask a couple, but basically if a topic we're discussing teeters off, I have to be the one to ask another question to continue the conversation. As it stands now, I gave a one word reply to one of his answers, because I really didn't have much to say to what he said, and I've been waiting to see if he'll try to start up the conversation again by asking me a question. He's been online multiple times since I've sent that message and has not sent anything. So what do you guys think? When he said hang out, was he thinking in terms of friends? FWB? Relationship? I would think the fact that he responds frequently and asked me to hang out means that he's interested but why does he never initiate the conversation?
Stefanie Posted August 19, 2013 Posted August 19, 2013 I think it's too hard to say what he wants specifically. But I can see that his interest clearly died down after he knew you were just as or even more interested than he is. The tough thing about dating is that there always needs to be a bit of mystery before you fully open up to each other. That way you remain interested and curious. It seems like you two had shared a lot with each other over email and now he has nothing left to wonder about you. My suggestion is either: - Wait until he tries to contact you and answer in a mysterious way. Reply after a while but don't share too much or answer fully. Seem busy and not too keen. Or; - Contact him for some reason and tell him only half of something exciting that might spark his interest again. Make him want to contact you and find out more. This might be a new job or a place you visited with a nameless, genderless, 'friend'. It is possible he's looking for FWB or worse, but given he was genuinely interested in knowing you, he could also be looking for something serious and he was considering you. Just remember to retain some mysteriousness.
Author dnyfk33 Posted August 19, 2013 Author Posted August 19, 2013 (edited) We haven't really shared that much of anything about each other. We haven't been talking for that long and we've only discussed shared interests, no real details about our own lives. It was only after i suggested that he watch a specific movie, that he responded by suggesting we watch it together after he arrives and gets settled. TBH i felt it was early for him to suggest that, but i figured just because I say it was a good idea, didn't mean I actually had to do it. And by the time he moved, we'd either still be talking and then I could confirm it was a good idea, or we wouldn't be talking anymore, and there was no harm in me agreeing it was a good idea. The thing is I've also seen that he's visited my profile everyday since we started talking. And he continued to even after he asked me to hang out. The activity sort of stopped after I gave him that one word reply. Could it be maybe he thinks I've lost interest? Since I usually give like multi paragraph long responses, and all of a sudden I respond with a single word? Edited August 19, 2013 by dnyfk33
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