volley Posted August 18, 2013 Posted August 18, 2013 My ex and I were together for six years. The last two years were rough. We lost a baby at 16 weeks. I became very depressed for the last two years, he seen a person that wasn't myself and lost his love for me. I tried to get help but thought I was better. After he broke up with me I found this wonderful lady who helped me get through my depression and break up. Let me say I'm 100 times better , back to myself again but better. I love my ex so much and I believe he is my soul mate. What hurts is when he broke up with me he said will never ever be together again. I just think that's a crock of bs. Our relationship was so good until we lost the baby and he seen me go down hill. I think he is afraid that I will be that way again. I will so never be that depressed women. Anyways he had a fwb 3weeks after he broke up with me and I started dating someone 7months after our break up. He contacted me to hang when I was dating someone but I declined. After I broke up with thiis guy ,I contacted my ex and asked if the option was still open he said yes. We hung out a few times. He showed feelings towards I and me back to him. Then one day I asked him to hang and he said we are still cool friends but I need my space nothing personal. I assum he is seeing someone. So I am giving him his space. Placing the nc rule. My question is how long should I wait to contact him? I love this man so much and I want to be back with ad his gf. I believe he still has feelings for I and that's part of why he needs r ime tohimself. I meen I think he was going to propose to me a few yrs ago Just the hits of his family members but I think he is also scared to commit, he is 42 yrs old.
lastking Posted August 21, 2013 Posted August 21, 2013 Use NC but mix it up with LC (limited contact ) after a few weeks so that he knows that you still want to work things out.
Simon Phoenix Posted August 21, 2013 Posted August 21, 2013 Use NC but mix it up with LC (limited contact ) after a few weeks so that he knows that you still want to work things out. Bad idea. If he has any interest in working things out he'll let her know. She needs to go complete NC to settle herself and heal and allow him to settle himself. Plus, breaking NC after a couple weeks is useless. That's basically an extended business trip. He can't miss someone who doesn't go away. LC is a bad idea right now and is a bad idea until the dumper gets to the point where he or she is fine with however contact plays out. Otherwise it's just prolonging the pain of the initial breakup and adding confusion. I'd say three months NC minimum. 1
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