Aren't people who use OLD desperate?

[henderson14]

I'm not talking totally desperate, but they have to be at least a little bit. You can at least agree that they are using it because they have tried and not had any success with any of the normal methods, and are actively looking for someone.

[phineas]

I'm not talking totally desperate, but they have to be at least a little bit. You can at least agree that they are using it because they have tried and not had any success with any of the normal methods, and are actively looking for someone.

 

aren't people who use online forums lonely losers?

 

I mean you can agree they are at least a little bit lonely because they are home on a sat afternoon posting on a forum called Love shack instead of out in the world living their life with all their friends & family.

 

And if they are trolling a forum on a sat afternoon?

They are totally a grown man and obvious virgin living in their mother's basement.

God, i'd hate to be one of those pathetic individuals.

 

Now, if you'll excuse me I need to wipe & flush & go back outside into the sun.

[StanMusial]

I'm not talking totally desperate, but they have to be at least a little bit. You can at least agree that they are using it because they have tried and not had any success with any of the normal methods, and are actively looking for someone.

 

I tried it out of desperation, to some degree. Like a Hail Mary pass on 4th down in the closing seconds of the game. The pass I threw was intercepted at the 1 yard line and ran back 99 yards for an opponent touchdown.

[SugarLips72]

Traditional method meaning what, bar hopping? Yes lots of winners there. Mostly guys wanting to get laid.

 

I have used online dating since I have kids, I work at home, I rarely go out and honestly I do not have a ton of adult interaction. I go to the gym...I go to work out not flirt I do my business and then go home.

 

 

I do not find many cute guys in the feminine hygiene aisle at the grocery store.

 

 

 

Do tell me if online dating is so bad...where can I meet guys at?

Lots of losers online too you really have to weed out the ones that are idiots.

[Joaquin]

Yes. Everyone is very cool about it but deep down I think they do.

 

It probably works against men the most. Woman want to believe their guy is desirable and has chosen them, and if he's online it unfortunately indicates he cant pull very much in the real world. How is that attractive.

[Atem]

I'm not talking totally desperate, but they have to be at least a little bit. You can at least agree that they are using it because they have tried and not had any success with any of the normal methods, and are actively looking for someone.

 

You obviously just want to get reactions out of people with this silly statement.

 

But, fine, I'll oblige - I use OLD quite frequently actually because of 2 major reasons:

 

1. Convenience - I travel A LOT because of my job and don't have too much time to go out and meet girls the "normal" way

 

2. Quality - I live in DC and her the girls who I've met through OLD have been pretty nice (both physically and personality-wise). Haven't found a girlfriend through OLD but it has brought me many fun outings and nights...

[sillyanswer]

You can at least agree that they are using it because they have tried and not had any success with any of the normal methods, and are actively looking for someone.

 

No, sorry, I can't agree with that either. There are plenty of people using it insincerely or as a joke or to boost their ego or to scam money from you or to 'prove' how much easier dating is for the other sex by making a fake profile etc.

[irc333]

I'm not talking totally desperate, but they have to be at least a little bit. You can at least agree that they are using it because they have tried and not had any success with any of the normal methods, and are actively looking for someone.

 

 

In the 90's it was considered desperate but now....it's become more acceptable...I mean, with all the Match.com/ E Harmony commercials publicly advertised on TV, it's very common.

[Emilia]

Yes they are. I used it mainly when I was unemployed and had to be careful with money and couldn't get out and about to meet people IRL quite as much. Chasing after strangers rather than create opportunities through a social circle is quite desperate yes.

[KathyM]

I think a lot of people find it convenient, and a good way to meet a lot of people that they wouldn't otherwise run into out in public or in their social circle. For many, it's just one way of meeting new people, and they use other, more traditional and non-traditional ways as well, such as through their interests and their social life. I know several people who have used it, and these were not desperate people by any means. They all had a lot going for them and could have dated through other means. This was just one of the more convenient means that enabled them to meet people they wouldn't have otherwise met.

[CptSaveAho]

Aren't people who use OLD desperate?.

 

Yes

 

aren't people who use online forums lonely losers?

 

I mean you can agree they are at least a little bit lonely because they are home on a sat afternoon posting on a forum called Love shack instead of out in the world living their life with all their friends & family.

 

And if they are trolling a forum on a sat afternoon?

They are totally a grown man and obvious virgin living in their mother's basement.

God, i'd hate to be one of those pathetic individuals.

 

Now, if you'll excuse me I need to wipe & flush & go back outside into the sun.

 

Way to avoid and deflect more but to answer OPs question... yes

 

Traditional method meaning what, bar hopping? Yes lots of winners there. Mostly guys wanting to get laid.

 

I have used online dating since I have kids, I work at home, I rarely go out and honestly I do not have a ton of adult interaction. I go to the gym...I go to work out not flirt I do my business and then go home.

 

 

I do not find many cute guys in the feminine hygiene aisle at the grocery store.

 

 

 

Do tell me if online dating is so bad...where can I meet guys at?

Lots of losers online too you really have to weed out the ones that are idiots.

 

Ummm, so you meet losers at bars and you meet losers at OLD, how about going to church? doing volunteer work? charity? sporting events? parks ? bookstores? starbucks ? concerts? I can go on forever,

 

The verdict has been out on OLD for a long time now... its essentially the concept of "Water seeks its own level" The sad part is people now adays are too lazy to go out and do any work. People make up all these excuses why to online date knowing that it sucks and the people on there suck.

 

I don't get it. Didnt Albert Einstein say “Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.” Yet people keep doing it.

[henderson14]

aren't people who use online forums lonely losers?

 

I mean you can agree they are at least a little bit lonely because they are home on a sat afternoon posting on a forum called Love shack instead of out in the world living their life with all their friends & family.

 

And if they are trolling a forum on a sat afternoon?

They are totally a grown man and obvious virgin living in their mother's basement.

God, i'd hate to be one of those pathetic individuals.

 

Now, if you'll excuse me I need to wipe & flush & go back outside into the sun.

 

 

Sounds like they are just insecure.

[henderson14]

Traditional method meaning what, bar hopping? Yes lots of winners there. Mostly guys wanting to get laid.

 

I have used online dating since I have kids, I work at home, I rarely go out and honestly I do not have a ton of adult interaction. I go to the gym...I go to work out not flirt I do my business and then go home.

 

 

I do not find many cute guys in the feminine hygiene aisle at the grocery store.

 

 

 

Do tell me if online dating is so bad...where can I meet guys at?

Lots of losers online too you really have to weed out the ones that are idiots.

 

OK. That means you have a degree of desperation because you can't find a guy in the real world and want one. It doesn't mean you are a looser.

[irc333]

Not sure where you got that idea....it was more considered desperate back in the 90's during the dial-up days, but now it's even being advertised on TV. It's more widely accepted these days.

 

ie - Eharmony, Match.com, Match.com stir events, etc.

 

I have known people who have met through chatrooms and through My Space back in the day

 

At church, volunteer organizations, you mostly wind up finding married people at those events or at least someone with a sig other.

 

 

Yes

 

 

 

Way to avoid and deflect more but to answer OPs question... yes

 

 

 

Ummm, so you meet losers at bars and you meet losers at OLD, how about going to church? doing volunteer work? charity? sporting events? parks ? bookstores? starbucks ? concerts? I can go on forever,

 

The verdict has been out on OLD for a long time now... its essentially the concept of "Water seeks its own level" The sad part is people now adays are too lazy to go out and do any work. People make up all these excuses why to online date knowing that it sucks and the people on there suck.

 

I don't get it. Didnt Albert Einstein say “Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.” Yet people keep doing it.

[Star Gazer]

I think a lot of people find it convenient, and a good way to meet a lot of people that they wouldn't otherwise run into out in public or in their social circle. For many, it's just one way of meeting new people, and they use other, more traditional and non-traditional ways as well, such as through their interests and their social life. I know several people who have used it, and these were not desperate people by any means. They all had a lot going for them and could have dated through other means. This was just one of the more convenient means that enabled them to meet people they wouldn't have otherwise met.

 

Convenience and "getting outside of my bubble" are the two primary reasons I use it. All the men in my social circle are attached.

[salparadise]

The verdict has been out on OLD for a long time now... its essentially the concept of "Water seeks its own level" The sad part is people now adays are too lazy to go out and do any work. People make up all these excuses why to online date knowing that it sucks and the people on there suck.

 

Translation: His pics don't pull, has trouble making sentences, can't get any decent women to respond to his messages.

[HoneyBadgerDontCare]

Yes

 

 

 

Way to avoid and deflect more but to answer OPs question... yes

 

 

 

Ummm, so you meet losers at bars and you meet losers at OLD, how about going to church? doing volunteer work? charity? sporting events? parks ? bookstores? starbucks ? concerts? I can go on forever,

 

The verdict has been out on OLD for a long time now... its essentially the concept of "Water seeks its own level" The sad part is people now adays are too lazy to go out and do any work. People make up all these excuses why to online date knowing that it sucks and the people on there suck.

 

I don't get it. Didnt Albert Einstein say “Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.” Yet people keep doing it.

 

I would say, for men, it's broken down for to 2 types of guys:

 

1) Guys that don't have time to date IRL or work in a male-dominated field

2) Guys that are desperate

 

For girls, it's also broken down into 2 types of women:

 

1) Women looking for sex from the best looking guys that they can't meet IRL

2) Women that have entitlement issues and think they're hotter than they actually are

 

Of course, these 2 types of women frequently overlap.

[StanMusial]

Translation: His pics don't pull, has trouble making sentences, can't get any decent women to respond to his messages.

 

Not necessarily.

 

I just did a search on POF. Criteria, 5 mile radius of my zip code, 30 to 45 age range.

 

Females: 274

Males: 600+

 

With those odds, you'd have to be desperate. If I actually narrowed it down to women I think I would like in reality, the number would be much lower. Maybe it would be different somewhere else, but I doubt it would be much better.

[sillyanswer]

Convenience and "getting outside of my bubble" are the two primary reasons I use it.

 

I definitely get to meet people I wouldn't have been able to meet through my social circle, so I agree about the bubble thing.

[sillyanswer]

For those who have tried online dating and have a view about the level of desperation of the participants (themselves excluded, perhaps) I wonder if there's a strong negative correlation between dating success and desperation perception.

[Art_Critic]

Of course not.. but it would seem that people who have not been successful with it or don't believe in it are the ones who seem to think people who do it are desperate.. the opposite is true for the people who have been successful with it or use it hoping to find the one...

 

When I was single.. I used OLD as my lifestyle didn't allow me to be in the same spots as available women...

I worked a lot of hours, didn't date employees of mine and on the weekends spent my time in a cabin in the mountains...

I also had many hobbies, woodworking and others that didn't lead me into dating type social gatherings...

 

I had many relationships brewed from OLD and many lasted a year or so.. I also met my wife on match.. our son is 5/12 years old today, was I desperate.. not in the least... but I was successful in finding someone.. my wife through OLD and since I have a son born from OLD then my whole future was formed because some guy or girl created match . com and I joined...

 

It did have to learn how to make OLD work for me.. it wasn't easy and you have to wad thru many roadblocks such as prostitutes using OLD, or people who were married or not honest in the profiles they posted in order to make the best of my time I spent forming emails or creating my profile but it was all worth it.. to me...

[salparadise]

For those who have tried online dating and have a view about the level of desperation of the participants (themselves excluded, perhaps) I wonder if there's a strong negative correlation between dating success and desperation perception.

 

Desperation is a loaded word. It's understandable that people who have little success would characterize it that way. To me it's the land of opportunity. Right now I have conversations ongoing with several nice women, all of whom are attractive, adventurous, educated, interesting... and interested. I wouldn't even become aware of several such people in a year's time otherwise. These women don't hang out in bars (or churches) with a sign around their necks saying "I'm available, I'm interested in you, talk to me, ask me out." Online they do. If that's desperate, then sign me up!

[tbf]

you have to wad thru many roadblocks such as prostitutes using OLD

Was this a Freudian slip?

 

My dating style prior to getting remarried, was through organic real life meets. OLD was unappealing since it was full of strangers where there isn't even the opportunity to gauge chemistry and body language before a meatspace date. No thanks.

[Star Gazer]

Not necessarily.

 

I just did a search on POF. Criteria, 5 mile radius of my zip code, 30 to 45 age range.

 

Females: 274

Males: 600+

 

With those odds, you'd have to be desperate.

 

For who, you? As a man?

 

Doesn't this again smack of, "Those who don't have success with OLD find using it to be "desperate" whereas those who meet lots of great people through it don't"?

[Art_Critic]

Was this a Freudian slip?

 

hahaha... I guess it could be... cold medicine.. I have a cold