volley Posted August 16, 2013 Posted August 16, 2013 (edited) my ex boyfriend and I were together for six yrs, he is know 42 and I'm 27. With the age difference it worked out pretty well. We had a good relationship. I supported him while he contracted over seas for a yr and then he came back home. Found out we were pregnant in 2010 unexpected . We both didnt want children, but things happen. We lost the baby at 16 weeks due to some serious complications. After that 2011 &2012 I was a person that had postpartum depression. I emotionally ate , became very lazy, didn't want to hang with friends, became very insecure with myself and body, sexually unactive. Very moody.Etc. I tried to get help then thought I was better and stopped going for help. Until one day I came home he said we are done I have no love for you any more. He stated that will never get back together.to me I thought that was so harsh . He had a fwb 3 weeks later for 8 month. I started to date7 month after we broke up. Got into a relationship. Then my ex and I ran into each other we talked he asked me if I wanted to hangout and I said I couldn't cause I was with someone he said ok. He said to me I have beautiful hair I said thanks and laughed. I thought that was odd for him to say. He told me he and his girl split. A week later I split with my guy. I asked my 1st ex if the option was still open and he said yes. We went out a couple of times . The last time went to dinner and we back to his place. He was very flirty. We cuddled on his bed and ppflirting then I kissed him and then I said I can't do that. I left a week went by and I asked him to hangout he said he had a lot on his plate and he need his space nothing personal. Oh I forgot to say after we broke up I got some amazing. help And I am back to my normal self but improved.so I am giving him his space cause i think is right and out of respect. Also i think he might have another fwb. He states he wants to be friends with me and we are trying.I love this man so much and I would love to be back into his arms as his gf. I know deep down he loves me more than a friend. I know we could have a second chance of being together and have something so beautiful. We are two great ppl and I had the flaw of being depressed and making him see a person th at I wasn't to make him fall out of love . How long should I wait to ask to hangout agaon? Its been a month with nc. Does a guy really mean never going to be together again ? It just seems so harsh whenare relationship was good. Beside the last two year. I feel like he said that because he seen the worst in me and thinks that will happen again . How do I get him back? Edited August 16, 2013 by volley
HumptyDumpty Posted August 16, 2013 Posted August 16, 2013 He states he wants to be friends with me and we are trying Wow, first of all: paragraphs! Some space makes things already much easier to read! Now, I picked out the answer to your question! He wants to be friends. Not get back together. No FWB. No, he stated "friends"! You need to learn to take the information given as it is. There's no more searching to be done, you have to act from there! Ok, so, don't expect anything there! You need to be sure that you can give him this friendship! Are you over him? can you be happy for him when he's having one-night stand every night? If tomorrow he has a girlfriend? that right now he's f* another girl he loves to pieces? If not, you need to go NC until you're emotionally fine with those aspects! Once it's done, you can be a good friend with him. Nothing more! Of course, once you're fine with those aspects, you both could try again in the future! When you've both healed, both single and you're able to restart a new relationship based on this new friendshippy-thingy! But don't count on this! You're only friends! Respect it! Enjoy the time as it is and don't overthink the situation! PS: friends don't have sex with each other! Always keep this in mind, he's a male, we never know
Author volley Posted August 17, 2013 Author Posted August 17, 2013 Humpty dumpty- sorry about the no paragraphs thing. Thanks for the info. I will stay in nc with him until he contacts me. I think I need some more time to heal. I always wonder what these women look like and when I find out they look so crazy and ugly and not for him. I'm like really you can do so much better. You had somone that is very gorgoues and know has her head on her shoulders etc. I did everything for him.I just hope he misses me and sees he messed up and had a good thing and will want to come back.
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