VanCal Posted August 16, 2013 Posted August 16, 2013 Feeling pretty crap today, work is slow and i can't stop thinking about my ex. im struggling to get in the right mind frame today, as much as i try not to think about it i can't stop hoping that she will come around, but i know she doesn't care! any advice on how to kill hope? i dont want to feel this way anymore! ive read pretty much every article on google about letting go lol.. why can't i just let go..when will this ride finish? 2
Kimmie80 Posted August 16, 2013 Posted August 16, 2013 I am in the same crappy boat I have researched EVERY possible article out there and I am getting really sick and tired of crying every day, every night when chances are, he is not even thinking of me He walked and Im left heartbroken and lost. I was giving up so much to be with him. I even have it marked on my calendar the last time we had contact. Its been 28 days so far. It sucks and hurts just like it did on day 1. Hang in there. It can only go up from here, right?
Author VanCal Posted August 16, 2013 Author Posted August 16, 2013 Thanks you hang in there too.. 28 days of NC doing great! do you lead a busy life? i try to but it seems there's not enough things to do in a day and when things are going slow that's when i think about it the most. i just want to be over these on and off days, i know taking one day at a time, but i wish it was 6 months down the track already!! lol
Kimmie80 Posted August 16, 2013 Posted August 16, 2013 I am trying to keep busy. I am raising 4 children, so that alone is a busy job lol. I attend school full time as well as work at a school board. I find it the hardest after class, sitting alone at home while the kids are at daycare. Im suppose to be doing homework and studying but I find myself online searching for answers and wanting to hear from other people who have gone through similar situation. The nights are also very hard for me. I use to listen to the radio to help me fall asleep, but now I no longer do. There just always seems to be a song that comes on that reminds me of him. I sound so silly grieving over someone I was with for only 2 months, but man, we hit it off and if felt so special. We can do this!! Good things come to those who wait 2
richard9 Posted August 16, 2013 Posted August 16, 2013 Time and no contact. And memories and hope fades. Its a long road im on around 11 months, lost track tbh. The only way to speed up recovery is to socialise with friends and be with family. If like me you are alone, self development through fitness, learning and meditation / spirituality. 4
Vinsanity1307 Posted August 20, 2013 Posted August 20, 2013 I am on day 27 of no contact and am still holding onto false hope. I do not know what to do either...Everything reminds me of her and that thought she will come back..so i know how your feeling....Just stay strong and if you need to talk dont hesitate ..gl
Petunia20 Posted August 20, 2013 Posted August 20, 2013 I'm on day 45 of NC. Some days are easier than others. I would also like to stop feeling like there is hope that he will return. I try to put myself in that situation and wonder if I could forgive. That thought alone hurts so I go back to trying to accept that he wont return. Talking to friends helps a lot. I've found that some of my friends are tired of hearing the same thing. So I try to write it down. It also helps me to think that I really dont know whether they're happy in their lives and that they might not be. Then I go back to thinking that it's not as bad as I let it seem. I think a lot! lol 1
donella99 Posted August 20, 2013 Posted August 20, 2013 im just going thru the same thing. i want it to end soon, life is hard when you are thinking about an ex 24/7
todreaminblue Posted August 20, 2013 Posted August 20, 2013 Feeling pretty crap today, work is slow and i can't stop thinking about my ex. im struggling to get in the right mind frame today, as much as i try not to think about it i can't stop hoping that she will come around, but i know she doesn't care! any advice on how to kill hope? i dont want to feel this way anymore! ive read pretty much every article on google about letting go lol.. why can't i just let go..when will this ride finish? i dotn think you should kill hope that you have ever, i think you can redirect it,channel it, and turn that hope to something that you have always dreamed of that doesn't involve the ex that you are holding hope for......is there anythign that you have hoped or dreamed about that doesnt involve your ex? an aspiration or a plan or a place you have always wanted to see that you left to hibernate and fall asleep to not come to pass over an ex?.....deb 1
Author VanCal Posted August 20, 2013 Author Posted August 20, 2013 I was NC nearly 5 weeks and i couldn't resist and broke it. my ex was upset that i didn't want to be friends.. so she was pretty much cold and indifferent when i called her, she thought it was best we stopped talking. she acted so immature on the phone. it didn't put me back to square one, i thought it did, it made me sad for the next 2 days (when i posted) but it definitely killed a lot of the hope one week NC (again) now i stopped thinking of her 24/7 and actually starting to realize my relationship wasn't that great with her. i hope this is the beginning of a breakthrough because ive been feeling good these past 3 days straight. i got up cleaned my house and did the shopping lol haven't done that in 2 months. im starting to feel some motivation to do stuff again. i start pre season training tonight for soccer, looking forward to that! maybe i needed a bit of rejection to knock those rose tinted glassed off. fingers crossed. hope everyone feels better soon! 1
todreaminblue Posted August 21, 2013 Posted August 21, 2013 I was NC nearly 5 weeks and i couldn't resist and broke it. my ex was upset that i didn't want to be friends.. so she was pretty much cold and indifferent when i called her, she thought it was best we stopped talking. she acted so immature on the phone. it didn't put me back to square one, i thought it did, it made me sad for the next 2 days (when i posted) but it definitely killed a lot of the hope one week NC (again) now i stopped thinking of her 24/7 and actually starting to realize my relationship wasn't that great with her. i hope this is the beginning of a breakthrough because ive been feeling good these past 3 days straight. i got up cleaned my house and did the shopping lol haven't done that in 2 months. im starting to feel some motivation to do stuff again. i start pre season training tonight for soccer, looking forward to that! maybe i needed a bit of rejection to knock those rose tinted glassed off. fingers crossed. hope everyone feels better soon! I am glad you are more motivated van cal, most often, its the little things we do that can move us forward, that it becomes a natural progression of the little things we haven't done or wanted to do that motivate us to keep stepping a walk on the beach, a clean room, a spotless sink even,baby steps but steps none the less, i hope things continue to look up for you ....best wishes...deb
Hoaks Posted August 22, 2013 Posted August 22, 2013 I have this too . It sucks so bad. 24/7 for the last 2 months non stop thinking about her and living in hope. I hate it, feels like it will never end. I just want to forget. Waking up every day thinking this is the day she will reach out. It's like ground hog day every day
Brown-Eyez Posted August 22, 2013 Posted August 22, 2013 I sound so silly grieving over someone I was with for only 2 months, but man, we hit it off and if felt so special. I am in exactly your same miserable boat From how I understand it when the relationship is so new and full of potential the loss of it is even a harder blow because of our idealizing..just tell my heart that anyway. I'm only in Day 12 NC and feel like $hit most days...I would like to contact him but I just ask myself, "what's the point?" There are no miracles. I'm getting by with nicotine & caffeine & some beer, sometimes I use a cold remedy for sleeping which helps. I'm probably gonna give up the cigarettes because they aren't even as satisfying anymore. I'm reading alot of self esteem books, dating books and how to live life more consciously but truly I'm just waiting for this awfulness to dull. Once I get myself back and have energy & life again, I'm gonna invent a remedy which cures heartbreak in 7 days or less (weak smile).
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